Page 40
It turned out that Sullivan’s was only too happy to find them a quiet, dark corner for their late dinner.
Zach ordered them a bottle of wine, claiming that even someone without a decent palate would enjoy it. Gavin made a face but found himself lighter than he’d been even an hour ago, sitting on his couch and wondering if this was when the other shoe finally dropped.
Zach was right, it had just been an off game, and they’d still won.
He could relax. That was not only allowed; it was encouraged on dates.
“Hey, thanks for suggesting this,” he said as Zach examined the menu, even though they both knew what he was going to get.
A steak, practically still mooing. Baked potato.
Sour cream, but no butter. Roasted Brussels sprouts.
And if they had something decadent and chocolate on the dessert menu, he wouldn’t even try to resist.
They’d shared so many dinners, nearly just like this one, not just since Zach had come back to Portland U, but even when he’d been his player, it was kind of amazing that Zach hadn’t smacked him upside of the head and told him that they were already dating before this.
“You’re welcome,” Zach said. Under the table, his foot nudged Gavin’s. “You deserve to be wined and dined before you get dicked down.”
Gavin flushed. They hadn’t done anything like that yet—unless they counted Zach pressing on his taint when he’d blown him last night. He had a feeling Zach wouldn’t count that.
It was hard to be disappointed, because even the handjobs and blowjobs they’d shared were so damn good. Hot and overwhelming and intense every time, like the moment they got their hands on each other, it was too hard to not get carried away .
Zach gave him a steady, incendiary look. “Or maybe before you dick me down.”
Gavin shifted uncomfortably, all too aware of how hard he was in his slacks. All because Zach had said dick twice and then looked at him like that.
“That . . .” Gavin’s voice was rough, and he cleared his throat. Tried to clear his mind. He’d worried he wouldn’t be able to clear it after the game, but it turned out that hadn’t been very hard for him—or for Zach. “Uh, yeah. That um . . .both ways.”
Zach chuckled. “Good. Me too. Now what are you getting?”
His doctor had whined about his cholesterol last time he’d had a physical, so he decided on the sea bass.
After they ordered, Gavin searched for something they could discuss that wasn’t hockey or how badly he wanted Zach’s foot to travel all the way up his leg, to where his cock was still pulsing against his zipper.
His brain grabbed the first topic it could find. “That was weird, tonight, when Morgan came by the locker room,” he said.
Zach shot him a semi-agonized look. “Do we have to talk about him on our date?”
“You really don’t like him.” Gavin was still surprised by this. Not that he’d really believed Zach liked Morgan, but that his dislike was so pronounced, yes.
“Is it about . . .” Gavin dropped his voice. “Hayes?”
“I’m not supposed to talk about it,” Zach said. But he sounded like he wanted to.
“Honestly, I didn’t even know they knew each other that well,” Gavin said .
Zach shot him a look. “Are you kidding me? You were there, front and center for it.”
It took a moment, but Gavin realized what he was talking about. “Are you talking about the Four Nations tournament? That was five years ago.”
“Oh, I know,” Zach said, rolling his eyes.
“Did they—” Gavin stopped suddenly. The memories were five years old, but he could remember some things—and one thing in particular.
One early morning, when he’d come out of his room to go for a run, and Morgan had been there, in the hallway, even though Gavin knew his room was two floors up.
Morgan had brushed it off, claiming that he’d had to check in with a teammate about their upcoming game that afternoon, but Gavin realized that Morgan had never said which teammate it had been.
“Yeah,” Zach said. “And Hayes would hate that I’m telling you this, but we’re . . .well, we’re . . .” He pursed his lips and blew out a short breath. “We’re together now. So you should know. Or know it all. It fucked Hayes up. It’s currently fucking Hayes up.”
“After five years?”
Zach sighed. “Is there a statute of limitations for loving someone who doesn’t love you back?”
“No wonder you looked like you wanted to kill him,” Gavin said. “Well, we knew Morgan was an ass.”
“Yep, we sure did, and Hayes knows it too,” Zach muttered, picking up his wineglass and taking a long drink.
“Probably better than anyone else,” Gavin guessed, and Zach nodded .
Their salads arrived then, and they were quiet for a long minute, eating.
“I thought I might end up like him,” Zach said out of nowhere, while they were waiting for their main dishes.
“Like Hayes?”
Zach nodded. “In love and no chance of it ever being returned.” He flushed then, like he’d just realized what he’d said. “Shit, I didn’t mean—”
But it wasn’t surprising. Gavin knew what it was like when you were with someone when love and desire were intertwined, and nothing about this thing with Zach felt casual.
He didn’t think he ever could have done casual.
Could he say it back yet? Gavin didn’t know, but he could at least reassure Zach.
“It’s okay.” Gavin reached across the table and took Zach’s hand, squeezing it. “I care about you, too. A whole lot. I’d never have done this otherwise.”
Zach’s embarrassment finally seemed to fade. “Yeah?”
“This isn’t just some flash in the pan thing for me. I’ve only ever wanted to be with two people, and you’re one of them, Zach,” Gavin said quietly.
In fact, the last thing Zach looked now was embarrassed. His flush seemed to be more of the “incredibly turned on” variety. Gavin was a fan.
“I feel like I’ve wanted you most of my life,” Zach agreed, squeezing his hand back. “This is like a dream come true.”
And it wasn’t a lie, not even stretching the truth for Gavin to say back, “For me, too.”
They did manage to finish dinner—only because Gavin teased Zach about needing to eat his protein so he’d have enough energy for later—and Zach even bypassed the dark chocolate mousse on the menu, giving Gavin a long speculative look as he told the waiter they had dessert waiting for them at home.
“So you’ve got something decadent and delicious back at your apartment for me to eat for dessert, huh?” Gavin asked as they walked out into the night air. It was cold for January, and their shoulders brushed together as they turned down the sidewalk towards Zach’s place.
“I think I can come up with something,” Zach said, the look he shot Gavin both earnest and scorching.
Gavin’s mouth went dry.
When he’d ever let himself consider what dating Zach would be like, he’d never imagined it would be like this. Easy and fun and intense and so hot it was a miracle Gavin’s brain didn’t just melt.
But it also wasn’t much different than what they’d been doing before.
Sure, the flirting was new—or not new , but neither of them were shying away when it got to be too much—and the sex was definitely new, but other than that, the dinner tonight could have been like a dozen others they’d shared in the last few months.
He told you, you just didn’t want to listen.
“Hey,” Gavin said, hesitantly. Zach liked it when he used his words. He liked it when he used his words. “I think . . .I think you might’ve been right.”
Zach smirked. “You don’t want to save that for later? Sounds like pretty hot pillow talk. ”
Gavin had no doubt that at some point in the evening, Zach would have him babbling out much dirtier things. And not only would Gavin not feel a hint of shame, they’d both probably enjoy it a little too much.
“No,” Gavin said, “this isn’t about sex.
” He flushed. Ironically he could dish it out in the bedroom, once they were both naked, but right now?
Walking down a street where anyone could see them and hear them?
Just the word made him hot under the collar.
“It’s about . . .well, the dating thing.
I’m glad you told me the truth. I think it probably sucked to do it, but you were right.
We were already dating. I just didn’t know it yet. Or I didn’t want to acknowledge it.”
“Yeah it did suck,” Zach agreed, his gaze warm on Gavin’s face. “But it’s okay, because you listened. Eventually.”
“Eventually,” Gavin muttered.
“Hey, before you say anything about yourself that you’re gonna have to take back—don’t,” Zach said, nudging him with his shoulder.
Gavin kind of wished he could reach down and squeeze Zach’s hand. But the publicness of the situation made it impossible, at least right now. At some point, they’d tell Sidney and, to a lesser extent, inform the team, and maybe he’d never be out out, but he wouldn’t worry about holding Zach’s hand.
“I just wanted to say . . .I’m glad we did this all those times before. All the breakfasts and lunches and dinners and film sessions. And glad we did it tonight, too.”
“Felt different and also the same, yeah?”
Gavin nodded .
They reached Zach’s apartment building and Zach motioned to the stairs, a knowing glint in his eyes as Gavin walked up them, Zach close behind.
“You’re totally staring at my ass right now,” Gavin said, cheeks flaming, wondering exactly what Zach was thinking. What he was planning .
“It’s an ass worth staring at,” Zach said frankly, no shame whatsoever.
Gavin liked him that way. It was why he trusted him to always get Gavin out of his head. To stop worrying and agonizing and just enjoy .
“Yours is pretty good too,” Gavin murmured.
“Glad you like it.” Zach sounded downright smug now. “Wanna see it a lot more?”
“ Yes ,” Gavin said, and that was all he got out before Zach was unlocking the door and pushing them both inside, pressing Gavin up against it.
Table of Contents
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- Page 40 (Reading here)
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