Page 31 of Bloodbane

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

Another Life

{ G R A Y S O N }

With a firm hand atop the blanket on Ruby’s chest, I pin her to the mattress, thwarting her efforts to sit up. I’m not surprised when it doesn’t dissuade her. I’m not sure I’ve met a more stubborn human. My lips fight to twitch up, but I train my face into a neutral expression.

“Stop fussing. I need to remove your cannula, and then you need to rest.”

“Fine.” Ruby huffs out a breath but follows the order, relaxing back down onto the bed. She fidgets with the fraying end of the blanket. “Why was Thayne here?”

The question is expected but grates at me nonetheless. Buying time to quell my irrational response, I busy myself unhooking Ruby from the machine and sealing the small wound left behind with a drop of blood. The mark that remains is a stark reminder of my inescapable legacy—leaving scars, some more visible than others.

“Grayson?”

“He came to ask for my help and offer his in return.”

“Well, that’s as clear as mud. Please tell me you haven’t reverted to cryptic crossword mode while I was visiting Death’s door,” Ruby groans, squeezing her eyes shut before rubbing the back of her hand across them.

I lower myself onto the edge of the mattress, careful not to touch Ruby. With the tryst from mere minutes ago fresh in my mind—even if cleaned from my skin—my thoughts, memories, and plans are a shifting kaleidoscope of confusion. Images from last night expand like glittering fractals in my mind, and Ruby’s gasped moans and desperate pleas mix with Thayne’s: a soundtrack of forbidden pleasure thrumming through me. Undeserved pleasure I shouldn’t have taken. The Fates must be pleased with themselves for the strings they’ve plucked to tangle me up in twin traps of temptation.

I should have fought it last night, knew as much before I succumbed, but the flames of desire were fanned by jealousy, and I had wanted to claim Ruby, to be the source of her pleasure… just as Thayne had been. Despite knowing her desires were fueled by the filth in her blood, I had almost claimed her body. I’d wanted to feel her wet and willing, feel her needy little cunt open for me. Wanted her writhing on the wooden counter, crying and shaking and begging—coming apart—for me. The sun taking the moon’s place in the sky had done nothing to dull that desire: I want her still. The allure of her body draws me almost as much as her blood, but it’s selfish desire only. Ruby isn’t a pawn to be used, nor a prize to be won.

I lift the corner of the well-loved blanket, trailing my fingers across the threadbare texture. “There’s been some dissent in the shifter ranks,” I offer finally. “The bastard that attacked you has left the pack and started his own. Thayne believes an attack is imminent. He asked us to stay with him until the full moon.”

“Us? As in both of us? Why? Who’s the target of the attack? What do you need his help for? Jesus, how long was I out?”

The rapid-fire questions have a small smile blooming on my lips. Ruby paints a beautiful picture reclined in bed: cheeks rosy against the white linen, dark hair mussed, bright eyes brimming with curiosity. I could imagine lazy mornings just like this, in another life. The thought of Ruby in my bed, sleepy and sated after a night of overwhelming pleasure, has an almost forgotten warmth thawing my cold chest. And maybe this other life would deliver Thayne back into my arms too—not because he needs to be there, but because he wants to.

“—rth to Grayson? Hellooo?” Ruby snaps her fingers in front of my face.

The blanket falls from my fingers. Perhaps in that other life, that would be my reward in Valhalla, but here and now, it’s simply a useless fantasy. I’ll be in Nástrond long before such ridiculous flights of folly come to pass. Dreaming of things that can never be will only make leaving all the harder when the time comes. And it is coming. As is the fight.

“He isn’t sure of the target—him, his pack, you, or me. But as this new faction can shift at will, Thayne’s afraid the strength of his pack won’t hold if the mutt attacks before the full moon.”

“He’s worried about me?” The pink of Ruby’s cheeks deepens into a pretty red.

I ignore the uncharacteristic jealousy burning up my throat.

“Of course he is,” I murmur. “Judging by how he looks at you, I’d say he’s already halfway to head over heels. You can’t say you’ve not noticed?”

“What?” Ruby squeaks. “Um, ah, no,” she stammers. “That’s not… I isn’t… we barely know each other!” She clamps her mouth shut, staring into space for a long moment before her brows draw together and she turns shrewd eyes on me. “Wait. How do you know what Thayne looks like when he’s in love?”

Checkmate. I would applaud Ruby’s clever volley if not for the memories slicing through me sharp as glass shards. I can’t bring myself to admit the truth: to say I know every one of Thayne’s faces, every one of his sighs and laughs and moans, to confess that I’d thrown it all away for nothing. I don’t have to. Despite my silence, Ruby’s eyes edge wide as she breathes out a soft gasp, understanding alighting her eyes before burning into unabashed curiosity. But I can’t give answers that I don’t understand myself. Finding out Thayne is a shifter should be the final nail in a coffin that ought to have been buried years ago.

And yet…

“You should eat. You’ll need your strength.” I frown at my words: an echo of Thayne’s. “I can make you something…” I trail off as I stand, recalling Ruby’s empty refrigerator. “Healthy hangover eggs? Or I can run into town and fetch you something.”

Taking advantage of my new position, Ruby sits up, ignoring my disapproving scowl. “I’m not hungry, but now you mention it…” Darkening eyes journey down my body slowly, pausing on the borrowed sweatpants for long enough that I almost look down to check my hasty job with the hairdryer hasn’t left any damp patches. Finally, her eyes lift. “You’re looking very… healthy. ”

At my raised eyebrow, Ruby flushes and shakes her head as if to clear it.

“Uh. I mean… is that… did my blood do that?”

“Quite the opposite. I haven’t been that ill for a few decades.” I can’t stop my wry smile as horror blooms over Ruby’s face.

“I’m sorry, I—oh, ow !” Ruby squeezes her eyes shut, a hand flying up to clutch at her head. She sways slightly before sagging back against the headboard, throwing her free hand onto the mattress to steady herself.

I reach out a hand instinctively but curl my fingers back in on themselves and recall my arm to my side. This protective streak Ruby rouses in me must be quelled. No good can come of breeding too much familiarity, of allowing her to get used to me, or worse, come to depend on me.

“Are you alright?” The question is perfunctory—I’ve already sought out her heartbeat and breathing, checking for irregularities. Though her pulse is faster than I’d like, it’s within the normal human range of stable.

“Yeah, fine, just got a little light-headed and kind of…” A strange look flits across Ruby’s face before her lips draw up slowly. Seductively. “You know what, I think I am hungry after all, but it’s not food I want in my mouth right now,” she says before her tongue swipes a shiny trail across her lower lip.

Heat bites at my skin as she wraps her fingers around my wrist. I resist the urge to jerk my hand away. Ruby’s vitals may not be cause for concern, but her too-flushed cheeks, beads of sweat dotting her brow, and glassy eyes mean I’ve missed something. I’ve gotten too close and lost perspective. Again.

“You’re not fine—you’re burning up.”

“I’m good,” Ruby insists, tugging on my wrist, trying to pull me closer as she kicks off the blankets draped over the bed. “But I’ll be even better if you cooled me down, especially if it’s from the inside out…”

I hold my position while my mind races. The transfusion must have failed. But why would the symptoms resolve before returning? Did I miss some lycan blood? It could have corrupted the fresh blood,

Ruby climbs onto my lap and too-warm arms encircle my neck. Tremors skitter through her body before feeding into mine. The odd scent simmering on her skin is unfamiliar and bitter. Everything had been for naught. Ruby is going to turn.

Heat brands me in failure as I pull her into my arms. She leans into the embrace, nuzzling against my neck, whimpering softly. There has to be something else I can do, something to keep Ruby human…

“Oh, god, you feel amazing,” Ruby sighs, dragging her cheek against mine before claiming my mouth, licking at me, moaning like I’m her favorite flavor.

It’s only when her hand moves down to palm at the borrowed sweatpants—rubbing over my fattening cock just as Thayne had done not an hour before—that I break the kiss with a hiss. I cup her jaw gently and pull her back, ignoring the plea in those lust-darkened eyes.

“This isn’t a good idea.”

Ruby cranes her neck forward, trying to recapture my lips, her fingers scrambling up my scalp, locking around long strands, attempting to tug me forward.

“What are you talking about? It’s the best idea I’ve ever had,” she counters, trying futilely to overpower the hold on her. “I want you, Grayson. I’m literally aching with how much I want you.” She rocks her hips, grinding down, chasing pleasure without awaiting permission. “I’m so empty. I need you.”

The old curses spill from my lips as I release Ruby’s jaw to grip her waist, stilling her motions. Seizing the opportunity, she lurches forward, clamping her mouth on the crook of my neck, teeth scraping over me uselessly—our earlier positions reversed. The threads of my restraint unravel as the warm, wet tongue slides over my skin. My cock throbs in anticipation. I can smell her cunt, wet and needy. Dark voices crowd my head, screaming for me to take, to claim. I could give pleasure beyond all she’s known. Would that not be an even trade?

“I need it. Need you inside me.” Ruby’s voice is stretched thin, brittle with desperation.

My fangs draw down.

“Please, Grayson. Fuck me. Please .” Tears slip down Ruby’s cheeks as she claws at me.

The bitter scent burns sharper now, turning my gut. This isn’t Ruby’s choice—it’s compulsion. The ache of forcibly retracting my fangs dry is enough to break the bloodlust roaring within.

I lift Ruby and set her down on the nest of blankets at the end of the bed. She stares up at me reproachfully, blinking wetly.

“No! No, Grayson, Please. You can fuck me and feed from me, I’ll be so good for you, I promise.”

I have acquired more than my fair share of willpower in my long years, but even I have limits. Ruby’s outstretched hand closes around thin air as I move to stand next to the bed.

“You’re burning up. We need to cool you down,” I explain softly, soothingly. “And then…” And then, what? How can I offer comfort when I’m in uncharted territory? Enemy territory. Will she stay like this until the full moon? Will she get better or worse?

Before Ruby’s gasp has fully filled her lungs, I’ve removed her sweat-damp clothes, leaving only her underwear to protect her modesty. The unfamiliar scent I had picked up earlier floods the room, no longer dampened by the thick fabric.

“Grayyyy, ” Ruby draws my name out like a prayer, rocking her hips into empty air.

My cock strains in its fabric prison, throbbing, leaking. Taking her would be easy but selfish pleasure only. She needs more than I can give. She needs…

I growl low in my throat.

“I need you to stay there, right there. Do you understand? I need to go and—”

“No! I can’t wait, I can’t,” Ruby cries, a breath away from a sob.

“Everything’s going to be fine. I’ll be back before you know it, with… help.”

Ruby’s only answer is a pitiful whine, her hips working in small abortive thrusts against her hand as she seeks to find her own pleasure.

The sight is almost enough to break my resolve, but after one last look down at the bed, I rush from the room, down the stairs, and through the door. The fresh blood in my veins has done its job already, and I speed from the house, letting my nose set my course. I’m a hundred yards clear of the house when Thayne’s voice stops me dead in my tracks.

“Where are you going?”

I choose to ignore the dark tone of suspicion coating Thayne’s words.

“To find you.”

“Why? And why—” Thayne leans close, dragging in a long breath “—do you smell like you’re…” He leans back, eyebrows tugging together, eyes turning stormy.

“Like I’m what?”

“Like you’re in heat.” Thayne sniffs at me again, pressing closer this time, tracing the scent down my neck.

I jolt as Thayne’s tongue traces the path Ruby’s cheek had taken only moments before. My cock twitches traitorously. Groaning, I capture a tight fistful of Thayne’s hair and jerk his head back. My eyes fix on the inviting arch of Thayne’s neck, my fangs aching, throbbing in time with my cock. I drag my eyes away before releasing Thayne’s hair.

“It’s not me. It’s Ruby.”