Page 11 of Blake University HBCU Chronicles: Azari & Chozen

“ I really hope I’m feeling okay when homecoming rolls around. I want to experience that at an HBCU. Just from watching YouTube videos, I know it’s gonna be fire,” I said to Chozen on our way to the doctor’s office.

“Yeah, me too. I really want to experience that with you. It’s only a couple of weeks away, right?”

“Yeah. Just from watching all the hype, them dancing to Lil Jon, Ying Yang Twins, and ‘Swag Surfin’’ videos from last year got me hype about this year. I need my body to cooperate.”

“We gon’ pray that it will.”

I was doing my best to stay in good spirits before my appointment, and I was doing my best to keep Chozen’s mind off it too.

While he was trying to hide it, I could tell he was just as worried as I was.

I appreciated his strength in this moment, but I refused to let him suffer in silence, even if it was only for a few hours.

Turning to him, I grabbed his hand. I closed my eyes for a moment, because even just that slight shift of weight on my hips was damn near debilitating.

“Chozen, it’s okay to feel nervous or scared.

I know this isn’t a normal situation. You don’t have to hide it from me.

I feel those things, and it would make you inhumane to not feel it too.

You don’t have to be a pillar of strength. I get it, baby.”

He glanced at me then brought my hand to his lips and kissed it.

I wanted to make love to him so bad. I was willing to endure the pain just so I could feel him inside of me.

This man was the real deal and the full package.

He was sweet, caring, loving, and a protector.

I could see that side of him when Fabian brought his stank ass to my place earlier.

The frown on his face said that just that quickly, he didn’t play about me.

I couldn’t imagine he possessed a confrontational or violent bone in his body, but had Fabian gotten out of pocket, I would have seen it front and center.

“I am worried, but not without hope. I have hope that you will come out of this shining bright. I’m just nervous about what you may have to go through to get there.

I don’t ever want you to think I’m not strong enough to handle what you’re going through.

I just hate to see you in pain. Even when you think you’re hiding it, I can see it.

I will always be your pillar of strength, no matter how weak I may feel.

That’s what a man does. I know if there ever came a time where I needed to lean on you, you would be there, showing strength you may not even have.

Let me be that for you, baby. Although we’ve only known each other for a short while, I will sacrifice myself to make sure that you’re good. ”

My eyes nearly rolled to the back of my head.

I needed him so badly, and I’d be damned if I was going to go another day without him.

I did my best to squeeze my legs together to control the stirring I felt below, but the friction against my clit only made it worse.

He glanced at me and asked, “Are you okay?”

I shook my head, keeping my eyes closed. When I felt the car come to a stop, I opened them to see we were at a traffic light. Chozen was staring right at me, and his eyes were filled with concern for me.

“I’m not hurting any worse, Chozen. I’m somewhat embarrassed to say now, for some reason.” I lowered my head and closed my eyes yet again. “I want to experience you sexually, Chozen.”

My body had begun trembling with nervousness, and that alone was irritating my hips. His hand slid across my cheek, then he grabbed my hand, pulling it to him. When I felt the material of his slacks, I gripped the hardness that I felt as he emitted a deep groan.

“I wanted you from day one, Azari.”

My exhale after what he said indicated I’d been holding my breath without even knowing it.

I opened my eyes and stared at him as he drove through the green light.

His skin had a slightly red hue, but the bulge in his pants was what was calling my attention.

Jesus Christ. Hopefully they gave me some strong pain meds, because my mouth was nearly salivating like those vampires’ mouths were in the movie Sinners.

He glanced at me, and a slight smile formed on his lips. “If I didn’t know any better, I would think you wanted to do something in this car.”

“It’s a shame you don’t know any better.

I would do it in a heartbeat as soon as you parked in that parking garage, if I were physically able to.

I do want to experience you soon, Chozen.

” I took a deep breath and chose to voice my thoughts.

“There may come a time when I can’t. I don’t want to wait that long to experience all of you.

I’m more than sure he will give me pain meds. ”

“I’ll give you whatever you want, Az. I’ve told you that. I surely don’t have a problem with that. I would love to give you more if you let me.”

I frowned slightly. I knew he meant things of monetary value.

The last man I trusted refused to offer monetary help, but then his bitch ass wanted to offer that very thing when he saw Chozen.

I knew better than to compare him to Fabian’s trifling ass.

Taking a deep breath, I asked, “What type of ‘more’ are you speaking of?”

I needed specifics. However, at this point, I would probably allow him to do anything except move me away from my family. This man had gained my trust in such a short amount of time. He glanced at me as he turned into the parking lot of the doctor’s office and headed to the parking garage.

“I want to take care of you and Xavier. I want to relieve all of your financial responsibilities, baby. Y’all can move in with me.

Taking care of you would be taking care of your family too.

It would relieve stress and everything. I mean, I know I haven’t even met Xavier yet, but given my situation, I wouldn’t have the least problem with taking care of a child that isn’t biologically mine.

I just want to do the most for you, baby. ”

The tears fell down my cheeks as he parked.

This was so damn fast. I knew he was financially capable of taking care of us, without a shadow of a doubt, simply because of who he was connected to, but the last thing I wanted to feel like or be perceived as was an opportunist. Once he parked, he turned to me and grabbed my hand, awaiting my response.

“This is so fast. I just don’t want to be perceived as a user. What would your family think of me? They would think it was too soon for something of this magnitude.”

“Is that your only worry?”

I took a deep breath and nodded. “Although it is soon, I trust you, Chozen. I know you have our best interests at heart. You’ve been there for me from jump. You literally carried me in your arms to class. How could I not trust a man like you?”

He bit his bottom lip, then leaned over the seat and kissed me tenderly.

As he was pulling away, I grabbed his braids and pulled him back to me.

Sliding my tongue to his seemed to be his undoing because he grabbed my neck, tilting my head back, and licked me from the base of my neck to my ear, then brought his tongue back to mine.

I couldn’t help but release a moan into his mouth.

My pain wasn’t a priority anymore. All I could think about was him sliding his dick inside of me.

He slowly pulled away and released a guttural moan.

That shit was so damn sexy. “Let’s get to your appointment before we both be orgasming in this car.

Damn, Az. Your words did something to me.

I swear I’m gon’ fall in love wit’chu . .

. even sooner than I anticipated. Just knowing you’re so receptive to me got me on the mountain top. ”

I smiled at him as he got out of the car and went to the trunk to get my scooter.

I hated this shit. I wished I could walk next to him, hand in hand.

Despite my physical limitations, this man wanted to love me and make love to me.

I was so blessed to have him. Having him in my life only added to it.

Like he said, his presence relieved so much stress for me, even before this conversation.

His spirit was so light and joyful. I couldn’t be in a funk for long when he was around.

He opened my door, and I did my best to stand on my own, but he wrapped his arms around my waist and helped me.

When I was standing, I puckered my lips, causing him to chuckle.

He lowered his head and kissed me, then helped me to the scooter.

I was hurting, but I knew I would manage as long as my mindset was right.

I was the happiest I had ever been, and my soul was at peace in the midst of uncertainty.

I knew it was because I knew that no matter what news I got, I had my family and Chozen.

When we got to the doctor’s office and I’d signed in, we sat in the waiting area.

Chozen sat in the chair next to me and held my hand.

“Chozen, I want you to know that I’m feeling so much peace right now.

While I never like to base things of that nature on another person, I have to attribute that to you. You calm my spirit.”

He kissed my hand and smiled at me. “After our talk in the car, the last thing I’m feeling is peace. I’m antsy.”

I giggled. I almost didn’t recognize my laugh. My face was hot, so I was definitely blushing. He slid his thumb over my cheek and just stared into my soul until the nurse called us to the back. I swallowed hard and said, “Let’s get this over with.”

He stood from his seat and said, “Let’s.”