Page 16

Charles had shown me a secondary staircase at the end of our hallway, ostensibly for the servants but ill-used because it ended in a dusty sitting area.

I slipped on my shoes and headed down these steps, making my way through the sitting room and out to a small hallway that took me directly to the garden.

Rudolph clearly knew the path I would take, because as I emerged into the night, he was already waiting for me.

I noted, with some surprise, that he was barefoot, and wondered if he and Arthur had done this same thing countless times before.

“So,” Rudolph said as I fell into step beside him, following him towards the entrance to the gardens. “Did Felix sate your curiosity?”

I had always heard the dangers of estate gossip, but to bear witness to it taking place so quickly was a genuine surprise, my gaze flitting to Rudolph briefly before I looked away once again. “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that you found out so quickly.”

“I’m quite good friends with one of the maids,” Rudolph said, and there was a note of apology in his voice that was quite foreign to me. “When she mentioned he’d visited you so late, I could think only that you had asked him.”

“How did you know?”

“I am in the public eye far more than I can stand,” Rudolph said.

“There have been times where I’ve worn a new hat or spoken a little too loudly in a pub and it has ended up in the newspaper.

It has made me all too aware of eyes upon me and excellent at reading the thoughts of those who are looking.

And you… I’m afraid to say that your eyes are quite expressive for a man in such a precarious position. ”

It was what Felix had said too. I was obvious in my gaze, but I didn’t know how to stop it.

I couldn’t understand why I was so different from other men, why I could be so easily caught.

“Has Arthur noticed?” I asked, the words sticking in my throat, and Rudolph breathed out through his nose, a single, stifled laugh.

“You could have your lips on Arthur’s and he would still doubt your intentions,” Rudolph said, and his blunt acknowledgment of the sexuality that I had long tried to keep to myself sent a small, thrilling jolt through my body.

“No, he has not noticed. And I hope Felix’s words haven’t made it so you want to bring it to Arthur’s attention, either. ”

I looked at him, searching his face, but as he was sidelong to me it was difficult to read what was written there. “I wasn’t planning on saying anything,” I said.

“No, but as easy as it was for you to figure out myself and Arthur’s relationship, I figured out yours and his.

At dinner tonight, and in the hours after, he could not take his eyes off you, regardless of who was speaking to him.

He is already fascinated. You need not say a word, and yet his feelings will only grow, and it is not safe for him to allow himself to have that sort of relationship again. ”

Something twisted in my chest, a simultaneous pang at the thought that he may already feel the way I felt and a realization that Rudolph was telling me this for some greater purpose. “You think he would be in trouble?”

“You’re looking into the case,” Rudolph said, looking at me. “Tell me, Thomas. You know he was blackmailed. Do you have any idea why?”

“I thought it was because of you,” I said.

“There’s ninety minutes unaccounted for on the day of the poaching accident where you and Arthur were in the library together.

I thought that may have led to the blackmail, but Felix told me tonight that you and Arthur were no longer lovers when the blackmail began. ”

“We weren’t, but the evidence of our relationship remained, and James had his suspicions.

The legal proceedings allowed the lawyer access to Arthur’s library, and I understand he found letters that Arthur had kept.

” I felt sick, but Rudolph continued, his head tilted back slightly to face the moon.

“We had not signed them with our names, but they were… explicit enough that anyone could make an educated guess.”

“How did the blackmail end?” I asked, and Rudolph laughed again softly. “What?”

“It was Ida,” he said. “She got it out of me, found out the truth, and she took responsibility for the letters. She claimed that Arthur was the intermediary between her and another man, and that he had held on to the letters so no one would suspect her of no longer honoring their betrothal. As a result, they had to publicly renounce their engagement.”

Horror twisted up inside me at the revelation and I stopped in my tracks.

For a woman in Ida’s position, a marriage was the most important thing she could hope for, and to have to rescind her engagement to save her brother was terrible.

Rudolph came to a stop as well, turning to look at me with his hands in the pockets of his trousers.

I looked at him, a knot of emotion in my chest. “Louis Garretty did all this? Just to blackmail Arthur?”

“Arthur is extremely wealthy, with a huge amount of influence,” Rudolph said.

He took a step towards me and for the first time, I realized that the way he was looking at me was familiar, a hunger that I recognized all too well.

“Eyes are always on him and he’s unable to avoid that sort of scrutiny.

It makes him a poor choice for a lover.”

I looked up at him, searching his face, and realized exactly what was happening. “You’re not jealous of any feelings I might have for Arthur.”

“No,” Rudolph said. “I don’t have any illusions that Arthur and I will ever become lovers again. The blackmail was the final nail in the coffin.”

“But there’s a reason you’re warning me about this,” I said, and stayed stock-still as Rudolph closed the distance between us, resting his slim fingers on the side of my throat. “You’re jealous of Arthur.”

“I can easily see why he would be smitten with you,” he said, and that same damned thrill went through me.

Despite the heat of Rudolph’s fingertips on my skin, I could think only of Arthur, of the idea of him being attracted to me, although I didn’t see it that way myself.

He was opening up to me, of course, becoming more comfortable, but smitten seemed far from the truth.

“You are terribly handsome, and your unwillingness to speak with deference is refreshing for men like Arthur and myself.”

“You’ve known me for less than a day,” I whispered, his thumb pressing against the soft underside of my chin, pushing my head back. “How could you possibly know?”

“Arthur will never be able to love a man without inhibition,” Rudolph murmured.

“He will do his duty and he will marry a woman and you will be left behind. All I ask is that you give me the summer. Do not be so hasty in your choice. I’ve told you everything I know, so there is nothing you can leave out of your decision.

I may be two weeks behind in terms of courting, but I would be a fool to give up. ”

Any rebuttal died in my throat as he kissed me, his fingers still on my chin as he pressed his lips to mine.

His mouth tasted of tea and the brandy we had been indulging in after supper, but there was an undercurrent of his own taste running beneath it all, especially as his tongue slipped over my lower lip, attempting to coerce me into opening my mouth.

The kiss was far from chaste, and I am ashamed to admit I leaned into it, a distinct lack of sex in the preceding months opening me up to the sudden affection.

He pulled back slowly, chasing my mouth for a few more lingering kisses before he let go of me, his dark hair wreathed by the moon behind him.

“We have the summer, Thomas,” he said, and my name on his lips tugged at my stomach as though an invisible string had just been tied to the both of us.

“I hope you consider it. I’ve laid everything out for you.

” He took a step back, looking up at the estate. “All I want is a chance.”

With that, he began to walk back towards the manor, leaving me alone in the night air to contemplate what had just taken place. I had not anticipated Rudolph’s actions in the slightest and, unexpectedly, they had left me feeling far more curious than I had thought possible.