Page 42 of All The Way Under

“And even though he couldn’t say it, I know what he meant to say.

You would tell them that you’ve never seen me more myself, and at ease than I am when I’m with Catherine.

You would tell them you’re not sure how, but she’s made me better than I was before.

You know that she gets me in a way that no one else has.

And Catherine,” he says, turning to look at his bride.

“Brody was going to tell you that he likes you because you terrify him. In only good ways, though.”

The audience laughs.

“That your twin flame sarcasm is a love language, and you share a mutual understanding that eye-rolling is a valid form of communication. He would say that you’re already family, and we’re better for it.

On behalf of my twin brother and my favorite grump, let me say,” Nolan says, picking up a glass of champagne and handing me one.

“Here is to finding someone who makes your stubborn heart feel safe and to the people who love us even when we freeze at the mic. To Catherine and me, and to Brody, thanks for standing up with me today. Cheers.”

We clink glasses and take a sip. I can’t help the traitorous tears forming in my eyes. Nolan is the only person who has been saving me my whole life. I hug him, but then I take the mic.

“That was exactly what I was going to say. More or less. Thanks, brother.”

I pause, the crowd shifts, but I forge through the nerves because my brother paved the way for me.

“But I think I’ve got a few words left in me after all. Catherine, I expect you to keep him in line, and Nolan, good luck.”

The guests laugh.

“Nolan talked about love and people getting each other, but he didn’t talk about timing. Timing is something that you can’t fake. It’s either right or it’s abysmal. If you can’t fake it, maybe you can fix it or try again. It’s been a hard, life-altering year, but it had to happen.”

I shrug to control my shaking.

“I’m not here asking for anything crazy, like I’m sure my parents and Nolan want from me. This isn’t a grand gesture. I am asking, S.W., if maybe we can start over. As friends. Two people who once meant everything to each other, and who might again. One step at a time. That’s it.”

I raise my shaking glass.

“To fate. To timing. And to second chances, if we’re brave enough to ask for them. I love you, Nolan.” I say it out loud for everyone to hear.

The spotlight dims, and I can see my parents smiling.

I set the mic down on the table, and I leave the room.

Returning to my seat isn’t an option when I’ll have to face her.

I grab another beer—a mistake—and head back to the deck and walk down it as far as I can.

Past where the lights from the restaurant cascade out.

Hidden in the silence. The way I’m intended to be. The ocean hums softly.

I don’t turn when I hear the click of her heels.

Her voice is soft. “So…you want to be my friend, huh?”

I swallow the last of my beer and set the glass on the rail.

“It was either that or pretend that seeing you didn’t wreck my entire emotional stability. I couldn’t even give a damn speech.”

She lets out a laugh. The kind she does when she’s trying not to cry. I don’t dare turn to look at her or risk losing all control.

“You surprised me in there. That wasn’t the Brody from a year ago.”

“The Brody from a year ago let you walk away without a fight.” I pause. “The new improved Brody taught himself how to fight something other than bad guys, and also how to sail.”

She blows a breath from her nose.

“You learned how to sail? Like not pretending to sail so you could get captured and make it look real? Like, sail, sail?”

“I mean, I knew the basics when I got captured, but I still crashed into docks. I figured if I ever met another woman who was obsessed with sailing, I should probably brush up.” Another long pause. “You know?”

She reads through my bullshit jokes easily.

“You didn’t need to change for me. You know that, though. It was me who was required to change because of the family I was born into.”

Now I’m certain she’s crying, and I can’t ignore that. I turn, and her face is illuminated by twinkling fairy lights that someone inside turned on. My family truly did orchestrate an intervention and knew every move I’d take. Got to love them and hate myself for being so predictable, I suppose.

“You never needed to change. I wasn’t brave enough. It’s really that simple. I was always going to worry you only loved me because I saved you. Our time in the jungle wasn’t normal or reality. It fast-tracked our feelings, or that’s what I told myself, anyway.”

God, I missed looking at her face. Her lips. Eyes that scream adoration. Forever.

“I changed because not having you wrecked me in ways I didn’t know were possible. Sailing helped me figure out who I am when I’m not running from what I feel.”

Silence stretches on, and I’m a fool for thinking I could be her friend. I want to kiss her right now and never stop.

Saylor tucks her blonde hair behind her ears. An invitation?

“Here’s me being brave enough to ask for a second chance when I botched the first.” I grab her hand, and I feel it throughout my whole body.

“Saylor, will you go on a date with me? A real one. No timelines. Or media. Or guards. Or looking over our shoulders. My boat isn’t as nice as yours, but she’s fucking fast.” I grin.

“A sailboat date. No pirates.” I shake my head. “Just us.”

Saylor studies me, really stares. I know she’s looking for a tell, and I know she’d see it if I were trying to hide something. She smiles real and slow.

“Only if you let me captain the boat. You have to be my first mate.”

“Deal,” I say, too eagerly. “But I’m bringing the snacks. Fancy ones. Friendship-level snacks, at least, because that’s what we are.”

“Yeah, sure. That’s what we are,” Saylor says, raising a brow.

She squeezes my hand, and it electrifies me, making my heart knock against my chest and my mind race.

“Good. Good. Nice talk,” I say.

“It’s a date, Brody.”

“I have to know. Did my dad actually pay you ten dollars?” I ask.

Saylor tilts her head and looks up through her lashes, smiling.

“I didn’t take money from your dad, but I did promise to make you jump.”

“I am going to kill them all,” I blurt, noticing them all standing in a large window overlooking the dock, staring at us.

I give them a thumbs up. Mission complete.

Those fuckers have the audacity to cheer.