Page 30 of A Wager with the Matchmaker (A Shanahan Match #3)

30

Nothing at Oakland was the same without Alannah.

Kiernan reclined on the blanket and peered up at the stars, the trill of the crickets his only company. He shouldn’t have come out, should have stayed in his bedroom. But he’d ventured to the field anyway, hoping to think, hoping to find peace, hoping to figure out what to do next.

The lantern light glowed on the book he’d brought to read. But he hadn’t opened it and hadn’t enjoyed the beauty.

He’d thought staying away from Alannah would help him gain perspective and figure out what to do next. So he’d returned to Oakland three days ago. Instead of the distance helping, he was growing more restless, and the ache inside his chest was sharpening.

Should he ride to town and talk to her again? But what could he voice that he hadn’t already said? He’d told her he loved her, wanted to be with her, and that nothing else mattered. If he manipulated her into being with him, she’d only come to resent him and their marriage. And he didn’t want that.

No, she needed to want the match as much as he did, or it wouldn’t work.

Besides, he figured if he stayed at Oakland, he’d draw less suspicion to the city house. Not that the Farrell gang was suspicious. Like everyone else, they believed that Torin was buried in Wayfair Cemetery. Besides, they were too busy dealing with the charges of vandalism and arson to his brickyard as well as the charge of murder.

Of course, he hadn’t been able to press charges against Shaw specifically, since no one had seen him at the brickyard the night of the attack. But the investigator Kiernan had hired was compiling evidence that Shaw had been behind everything. It would only be a matter of time before the gang leader was arrested.

Regardless, Kiernan didn’t want to take any chances that Shaw would learn where Alannah was staying, at least not until after the man was safely behind prison bars.

As much as Kiernan hated to admit it, if she refused to marry him, then maybe she would be the safest going to California with her brother. There she could take on a new name and identity, and she’d be far, far away from the Farrell gang.

He closed his eyes against a sudden rush of pain in his chest at the prospect of her leaving and not being able to see her ever again. He couldn’t bear it.

“I see you can’t stay away from Alannah’s and your secret meeting place.”

His eyes flew open to find Zaira smiling down at him.

She was wearing a nightgown and wrapped up in a robe. Her single red braid fell over her shoulder, making her look younger than her nineteen years. But she’d proven herself to be a mature and capable woman this past week in her quick thinking, daring deeds, and compassion for Alannah.

He’d been tempted a time or two to tell her about Torin still being alive, but already too many people knew, and he didn’t want to risk anything, not until Torin was out of the city.

He’d learned that Enya’s husband, Sullivan, was due back in St. Louis any day. Until he arrived, there was still time for Alannah to change her mind. And if she didn’t, would he be able to let her go with Torin?

He wasn’t sure he could.

Zaira’s smile faded. “Sorry I’m not Alannah. I didn’t mean to disappoint you.”

Were his emotions that readable? Kiernan pushed himself up until he was sitting, then patted the spot beside him. “Join me.”

She hesitated a moment before she lowered herself. She tucked her legs up and wrapped her arms around them, staring into the distance at the dark woodland that bordered the meadow.

“Don’t worry.” Zaira bumped his shoulder with hers. “You’ll be able to sit here again with Alannah someday soon.”

He’d explained to his family that he was keeping Alannah at the city house in order to hide her. He hadn’t told them she’d rejected him again and wouldn’t be coming back. He could at least admit it to Zaira, couldn’t he?

He released a tight breath. “Alannah doesn’t want me, Zaira.”

She snorted a laugh. “Oh please. I was there when you kissed in the shed. And Alannah wants you as much as you do her.”

“I’d hoped to make the announcement of our match tomorrow at Liam and Shelia’s engagement party. But before returning to Oakland this week, I asked her to marry me. She said no.”

“How did you do it?”

“Do what?”

“Propose.”

He furrowed his brows. “What difference does it make?”

This time Zaira released a full laugh. “It makes a big difference, silly. You have to show her she’s more important than anything else, that you’ll sacrifice everything for her, and that you’ll go to the ends of the earth to be with her.” She sighed blissfully.

Kiernan slanted her a look. “You’ve clearly been reading too many romance novels.”

With a quick shrug, her lips turned up into one of her impish smiles.

Even if Zaira was being overly romantic, what if there was more he could do?

The honest truth was that he would do anything and sacrifice everything to be with Alannah.

He sat up straighter. What if he really did sacrifice everything to go to the ends of the earth with her? He’d already started the process of selling his glass factory. And with the loss of his business, he’d proven that he didn’t have what it took to become a savvy and prosperous businessman like Da.

It was time to admit he’d failed in his ventures. He wouldn’t live up to his da’s reputation and wouldn’t make the Shanahan name successful in his own right.

His mind began to spin. He’d sell his portion of the brickyard to Liam, give him full ownership. He’d take any profits that were left after helping with the repairs and follow Torin and Alannah to California. He’d wait for Alannah to be ready for a relationship with him. He’d spend his life waiting if need be. And when she was finally willing to have him, he’d be there.

He scrambled to his feet. “I have to get her a message as soon as possible.” Did he dare visit her tonight and tell her not to leave St. Louis with Torin, not until he had the chance to get his affairs in order?

Zaira stood. “I’m going into the city tomorrow morning. I can deliver a message to her.”

He started to shake his head, needing to see Alannah and speak forthrightly for himself. But he stopped himself. With how he’d failed to convince her so far, maybe he had to prove himself first. “All right. I’ll give you a note to deliver.”

He smiled wryly. He’d been wondering why Bellamy had given Alannah his list of requirements for a wife that day at the pond. He’d been frustrated that Bellamy hadn’t just destroyed it.

Now he knew why the wily matchmaker hadn’t. Bellamy had saved it to spur Kiernan into confessing what he really needed—a new list of requirements for a wife.

It was time to do what Bellamy had wanted all along.