Page 45 of A Fate of Ice and Lies (Fated #1)

I lifted my hand in the air with my middle finger raised in her direction.

“For the record, I think any male who calls a female hysterical has already been driven to madness.” Brenton shot me a small smile that quickly fell away.

“Why are you here?” I asked, exasperated.

I both wanted him to leave and needed him to stay.

He was Elias’s friend, the only link I had to him that I trusted.

Where Everly had betrayed me and George had killed, Brenton was Brenton.

He was both silly and sincere, and that same instinct that told me not to trust George told me I could trust Brenton.

He shrugged a single shoulder. “We’re friends. I try to be there for my friends when they’re hurting.”

I wasn’t sure how to answer. Wasn’t sure what to do about the tears that welled and threatened to fall.

“Is it all right if I give you a hug?” he asked.

Biting on my lower lip, I nodded. Then I was in his arms, crying so hard my shoulders shook. He let me, staying as silent as he’d been throughout the night.

I was grateful to him, knowing if I broke like this in front of Ryenne or Donnie, they’d worry. They’d be there for me as they’d been countless times in the past, but they’d be concerned. As it was, they had enough to fret over.

I straightened when I heard the crunch of footfall on snow behind me. Spinning around, I found Everly and George watching me from a few feet away. Quickly, I brushed my tears away. Everly had the decency to bow her head when I glared at her.

But it wasn’t anger that rolled inside me. Not really. Her deception hurt. But worse than that, I wasn’t sure if the friendship we’d formed was real. If any of it was real or simply born from her loyalty to Elias.

Nonetheless, the only thing I let her see was my anger. It was the only thing I could trust her with.

George’s hand went to Everly’s shoulder, where he squeezed, but she shrugged him off. For a beat, hurt crossed his expression before he replaced it with a bored look.

“None of you are welcome here.” I inched my clothes up to reveal the gun I holstered to my waist. Although I was certain they could hear the way my heart crashed inside me, I kept my voice level.

My hands shook, though, at the way I forced myself to stare them down.

At the words I forced myself to say. “You’re trespassing on my property.

I will only ask you once to leave. After that, I shoot.

” I forced ice into my veins, forced all that hurt to turn into a fury I almost believed.

“I do hope you’ll stay.” Lie. Everything was a lie.

I didn’t want them to stay any more than I wanted to hurt either of them.

“I haven’t done my target practice today. ”

When Everly stepped forward, I grabbed my gun and pointed it at her. My friend. Someone I had trusted into my home.

Tears stung my eyes, and I bit the inside of my cheek to keep them away. I couldn’t stop the way my hand trembled. The way the gun weighed heavier than ever.

George angled his body to stand in front of her. When he bared his teeth at me, I tilted the gun up to point at his head .

I held in my anguished sigh, but I didn’t want to do any of this. I didn’t want to threaten them or be this version of myself I knew I’d come to regret. But I needed them to leave. All of them, including my friends still sleeping in my house.

“I’m a good shot, George.” My hands continued to shake in rhythm with my blaring heart. A throb started at the base of my neck and spread to my temple. I could do this, though. Needed to, in order to get them off my property and away from my home. “I wonder, how did you kill Javier’s father?”

He flinched. Again, pain crossed his features with his eyes dulling before they returned to their natural light brown. His cheek twitched, but he remained quiet and still.

I took in his tall stature, that resolute look on his face, and I went for what I was certain would be the ending blow. “You strike me as the kind of piece of shit who would make an innocent man suffer.”

This time, Everly snarled at me.

“Teddy,” Brenton said softly, lifting his hands. “In the time it’d take you to shoot one of us, we’d be able to take your gun from you and splay you on the ground.” He said it with such kindness that it made my head reel.

One of us. He’d stayed with me as my friend but was one of them. My breath hitched. I knew they could hear it. Could smell my terror. But I wouldn’t waver. Not to them.

“It’s that easy for you, huh?” I asked, my voice small, not trying to hide the way it trembled this time. “To murder an innocent human?” I held George’s eyes until he looked down.

I hurt him purposely. There wasn’t any room for the guilt that rose and rose, threatening to suffocate me.

With my gun still pointed at George, I walked toward him. When I stood in front of him, I lowered my gun to my side.

“Would you make my death swift?” I asked him .

His throat bobbed, and he kept his head downward.

It was nothing compared to the shame that filled me. But this was it. How I got rid of the fae from my personal life.

“Or will you draw it out?”

I offered him my gun, and without looking at me, he took it. Seemed to weigh and examine it.

“Go ahead and kill me, then,” I dared, knowing he wouldn’t.

That despite him killing Javier’s dad, he wasn’t evil. Maybe he wasn’t bad either.

I remembered the way Elias had asked him if he’d taken care of the male he thought had tried to kill me. Only in fae talk, take care of apparently meant kill. So he had. He’d killed an innocent man they thought had hurt me and tried to kill me.

George tipped the barrel of the gun down, his shoulders hunching with the gesture.

A cold breeze brushed over us, but it was nothing compared to the chill that had settled in my bones overnight.

“I thought the man had tried to kill you.” It came out hoarse as if he’d screamed until his voice gave out.

“As Elias’s mate. . .” He shook his head, and I took a step back when he peered up at me with despair swimming behind his eyes.

“His death was quick. He felt no pain. I don’t relish in killing others, but I will do what I must for the people I care about. ”

Everly stood beside him, then brushed a finger across the back of his hand. When he inched closer to her, she stepped away but kept her hand a breath away from his.

It was all too much. Hitting me at once, one emotion after another.

“Leave,” I said.

I wanted everyone gone .

“Elias wants us to bring back the first journal you wrote in when you started having these dreams and to search your house for a relic that holds soul magic,” Everly said.

“And what Elias wants trumps what I want?”

“I’m sorry,” Everly said. “We only want to make sure you’re safe.”

Yes, guard the defenseless human. Lie and kill for her. All in the name of protection.

It was exhausting. Disgusting.

I wouldn’t have it anymore.

Elias promised to train me to fight, but we’d never had the chance. Or never paved time aside. Other things had felt more important. Like spending time with him, where he could unwind and not worry about all the responsibilities he shouldered.

“You two can search the house once everyone wakes up,” I told Brenton and George. I turned my attention to Everly. “You want to make things right between us?”

“Yes.” It came out low and almost hopeful.

“You will teach me to fight,” I told her. “Elias promised to teach me how to kill your kind. He said I’d never be stronger or faster than fae, but he’d teach me where to strike to kill. You’re going to teach me instead.”

Her smile was cautious with a hint of pride.

“You want to start now?” she asked.

Taken aback by how quickly she agreed, I asked, “How are you so eager to teach me to kill you when I’m this pissed at you?”

“It’ll take you a while to get to the point where you could kill any of us,” she said, her brows drawn together. “I’m hoping you don’t hate us as much by then. ”

That was the thing, though. I didn’t hate them. I wasn’t even pissed at them.

It was just easier to pretend I was than admit to the pain they’d caused me.

“If you’ll let me, I can help train you too,” Brenton offered with a sheepish grin. “We’re still friends, right?”

A part of me wanted to be spiteful and refuse him, but he’d come last night to check on me. Had stayed and offered quiet comfort. So I nodded to him, and his smile grew.

When I spoke, I directed my words to Everly. “This doesn’t make us friends.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to take it easy on me,” she said. “Don’t expect me to take it easy on you either.”

She gave me a careful smile, and I could’ve sworn I saw vengeance there. A promise for punishment. Maybe it was for what I’d said to George. Maybe for the way I’d hurt Elias.

Either way, I’d take it. I’d learn so I’d never be helpless again. So no one would ever kill another in the name of protecting me. My heart was broken— crumpled beyond recognition— but I’d rise again despite that writhing pain.