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He chuckles quietly, pulling out a condom and lube from his bedside table. My eyes fall on them, and I bite my bottom lip. “When was the last time you got tested?” I ask.

He smirks. “About two weeks ago, which is about the last time I had sex with someone else. All clear.”

Two weeks ago. Harrow. The parking lot. My pulse stutters at the realization, but I force myself not to feel jealous of whoever it was.

“Didn’t mean anything, Alex,” he says, his expression shifting like he can read my thoughts.

I fight off the jealous and smile. “Same,” I say. “I’m all clear, I mean. It’s been uh—a while.”

Try eight months and, sadly, none of them ever measured up to being with Rowan.

He grins widely.

I glare at him. “Don’t get excited. I’ve been busy.”

“I’m sure you have,” he grins, coming over to me and knocking open my legs with his knees. He rubs his thumb against my rib cage, just over the tattoo. I watch him warily, but all he does is hum before pushing me back on the bed.

He looms over me, his hair falling around him. I take in a sharp breath, staring up at him in some sort of veneration. He’s stunning.

“Seeing your tattoo just reminds me of all the terrible things you let me do to you, Lexie. All to make me happy.”

He smiles like he’s won some sort of game, and this is his prize, and then his mouth is on mine before his lips travel down to my throat. I groan, bucking up my hips in an effort to meet some sort of friction, but Rowan holds me down, his lips tracing a line down the column of my neck, sucking hard enough to leave marks. I groan and feel his smile against my skin.

He palms my dick, and I grind up. He glances down and grins. “You can get yourself off like this if that’s what you want.”

It’s tempting and I can’t stop circling my hips just to meet the friction. “N-no, I want you. I want you inside me. Please.”

He laughs, leaning down to whisper into my ear, “Since you asked so nicely.”

Goosebumps lift on my skin as his tongue trails down to my bare chest, sucking on my erect nipple. I groan, my hands raking through his hair. It feels so good. I could come like this, rubbing against him as he nips at my nipple. All I want him to do is flip me over and have his way with me, but I don’t dare move.

Finally, he moves away from my chest and then his hand grips my dick before he sinks down on it. I gasp, but I don’t care how loud I am. It’s been a while since someone has sucked my dick and Rowan is so good at it.

Blood rushes down, heat coiling at the pit of my stomach, completely draining from my brain and all I can think about is him, watching his head bob up and down in perfect rhythm.

“Fuck, that feels so good. Please don’t stop,” I murmur, my eyes closing and my head falling back.

I barely notice when he stops, only realising that he’s coating his fingers with lube a few seconds later, like I’m experiencing a delayed tape of my own life.

“You should see how good you look like this, Lexie. So fucking wrecked and I haven’t even done anything.”

I feel the cold touch of lube against my skin. I hiss and he takes me in his mouth again. His finger sinks into me as he continues to swirl his tongue against my tip.

Unintelligible words leave my mouth as he moves slowly before sinking another finger in. “Please, please, Rowan. I can take it.”

He does something with his tongue, and I curl into myself, my back arching off the bed. Rowan pulls off, that triumphant grin still on his lips as his fingers still move inside me, working me open.

“I’m ready, please,” I beg.

“You sure?” he asks.

I nod so quickly my neck might snap off. Rowan smiles darkly, pulling his fingers out completely and I hate how empty I feel. My dick lies neglected on my stomach and I’m tempted to reach for it and stroke myself to orgasm, but it won’t be half as good as I know he’ll make me feel.

“Do you want me like this, Alex?”

I nod, not trusting myself to speak. He stands, pulling off his sweats and his boxers, and I look at him, my mouth watering at the sight of his naked body.

He kneels on the bed, his presence commanding as he cages me beneath him, his arms bracketing my sides. For a moment, all I can do is stare into his eyes. Midnight blue. A starry night brimming with secrets—hidden constellations no one else will ever chart. I want to map them. I want to know him, all of him. And more than anything, I want those eyes fixed on me, just like this.