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Now she’s snorting. “I’ve heard the birdies. You having lunch with her.”

“Of course we’re going to have lunch sometimes.”

“How about going to the symphony?”

I sit up straight. “How did you know about that?”

“Mutual friend saw you guys there that night. In the Mathisons’ box.”

“So? She offered to take me, and I like the symphony.”

“Kathleen Marguerite Allen,” Eve says with that mother’s disdain, “I know you ain’t dating her, so…”

“So what?” I need to be careful with the defensiveness, but I can’t help it!

Eve turns her lips up into a rueful smile. “Are you fucking Ira Mathison?”

“What!”

“You heard me. You’re getting all flustered talking about her. People are seeing you together when two weeks ago you wouldn’t have been caught dead spending more time than you had to with her. Plus, uh, mutual friend says you two were…um… quite cozy in that booth.”

All the color drains from my face.

“You like oral sex at the symphony, huh?”

“Get the fuck out of here.” Although I intend my tone to be exasperated, it comes out embarrassed. Like me.

“No way.” Eve laughs, knocking over her popcorn bowl. Thank God it’s empty and thank God she didn’t knock over the wine. “No way.”

“Shut up.”

“So it’s true? You’re fucking Mathison?”

More like she’s fucking me right now, but I’m not going to tell Eve that. “It’s a casual thing. We’re not even dating, let alone in a real relationship.” No way in hell am I telling her about the kink thing. It’s bad enough she found out about us fooling around like this.

“She’s a–”

“I know what she is!” Why is my voice projecting? Why am I getting worked up like this? Shit, Kathleen, get it together! “Do you have kinky sex with every person you fuck? No? I didn’t think so. It’s not like that.” I’m really into this whole lying thing.

Then again, I tell myself, it isn’t like that every time with Ira. Last week we made pretty amazing love… shit, there I go calling it that again. What is wrong with me?

“Well, far be it from me to tell you what you are or aren’t doing in the bedroom.” Eve picks up the empty bowl, including some tiny kernels that managed to make it onto my carpet. “Although I hope you know what you’re doing. At some point, she woman is going to try it with you, and she may not realize she’s putting her silicone dick up on the guillotine for it.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice.”

“Speaking of which…” Eve looks way too comfy on my couch. Sure, she’s oozed all over it more than once in my life, but there’s something extra mischievous about it this time. And it’s all directed at me. “How is it?”

“How’s what?”

She scoffs. “You know what I’m talking about. How’s she in bed? Just because she’s the opposite of my type doesn’t mean I’m not curious. I hear things! Hell, we date the same women!”

I shake my head. She’s kidding herself if she thinks we’re having this delicious kind of girl talk. She will never, ever let me live it down if she found out that…

“I’ve heard two stories about Ira’s prowess over the years,” Eve says with a languished sigh. “Some say she can only do it with a prosthetic. Others say it’s just for show. So? Which?”

Normally, I would love to engage in sex talk with my best friend. But I don’t feel like it. Probably because this is a lot more personal than someone I picked up at the club and took for a ride for an hour until they couldn’t go anymore.

Eve’s stare bores into me. I’m not getting off this couch until I divulge something to her. Great. Time to play a game I have no interest in playing.