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He isn’t the detriment to my life he thinks he is, far from it.
And he didn’t die.
Freddy didn’t kill Phoenix like my sister.
Gripping his arm tightly, I tell him the truth. “I saved you because I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
“Angel.” He says my nickname like a prayer, his voice shaky, pleading.
Then he leans in and presses his lips to mine. The barest touch. It’s so tender it’s almost too much.
My heart squeezes so tightly in my chest it steals my breath.
“I’m so sorry, Phoenix. I’m so sorry.” The pain behind my rib cage is almost unbearable, the weight of this entire situation, of my life for the past few years, squeezing my soul mercilessly. “I want to tell you, I really do.”
Phoenix pulls me back, and I relax in his warm embrace. With my head against his chest, I cry until I have no tears left.
Soft murmurs filterinto my sleepy state, but the voice is still too far away to make out anything.
I swallow, immediately regretting it with my dry throat. The sound I make is something I’d imagine a dying frog makes.
“She’s awake. I’ll call you back.”
The voice is louder now. Clear and urgent. Phoenix.
I squint at him through one eye, grateful when there’s only a dull thrumming in my skull this time.
Phoenix leaves his spot by the window and makes his way toward me. “Sorry if I woke you up.”
“Water,” is all I manage to get out.
But he beats me to it, already holding a straw cup in his hand.
“Let me get you up first.” He pushes a button on the side of the bed, and the upper half quietly whirrs up until I’m almost sitting.
When satisfied, he lets go of the button and lifts the cup to my mouth.
“Slowly. Just a few sips.” His gaze is on my mouth as if he’s ready to yank the cup away if I try to empty the whole thing in one go. “I already got a scolding from the nurse because I didn’t get you any water earlier. Trust me, we don’t want to get on her bad side any more than we already are.”
One corner of his mouth ticks up, but it’s more grimace than smile.
The water soothes the ache in my throat, and I keep drinking until Phoenix pulls it away with a chuckle. This time, it’s genuine, and I automatically smile back as warmth spreads behind my rib cage.
There’s a knock at the door before it opens, but my brain is still stuck on how Phoenix and I just smiled at each other.
Really smiled at each other.
Like we used to.
“I told you to let me know when she wakes up this time.”
The firm voice drags my attention to the nurse walking toward me. She appears to be around my parents’ age, but despite the sternness in her voice, she gives me a warm smile.
Her name tag says Cynthia.
“How are you feeling, sweetie?”
I take a moment to do a self-assessment. “Okay, I guess?”