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Timothy’s eyes flash with surprise. I’ve never disagreed with him.
Why not? I was happy with Bo and I argued with him all the time. Maybe Abigail’s right about what I’m like with Timothy.
“I like Victoria,” I continue before he can say anything. “Abigail is so close to the school she works at and Tema has her friends. I have friends there.”
I have two—an older woman who works in the office that I take breaks with and another mother I met through Tema’s school.
“You can make more friends,” Timothy points out. “It would be so much better for me in Vancouver. And Abigail isn’t planning on living with us after we get married, is she?” Timothy laughs likeit’s all a joke. Like separating from my best friend would be an easy thing to do.
He laughs like I want to move in with him. Like I want to marry him.
A huge wave crashes against the pier, splashing icy cold water against my jeans, and the front of Lyra’s jacket. I jump back.
That might have been the wake-up call that I needed.
Because I don’t think I ever have wanted to marry Timothy. Not really.
If I did, this wouldn’t be so difficult—I would have showed up with divorce papers and a custody arrangement for Bo. I wouldn’t be dithering about if I still had feelings for Bo. If I wanted to truly have a life with Timothy, I would be having it already.
Bo would be part of my past, and I wouldn’t be wondering where he fits into my future.
Another wave crashes, but it misses me.
“Hettie?” Timothy finally realizes I’m not laughing. “Abigail’snotgoing to live with us, is she? I mean, I like her and everything, but after we get married, I’d like some time for the two of us. But maybe she can stay close by, watch Tema for us so we can do newly married people stuff. Doesn’t that sound nice? Give you a bit of a break.”
“Timothy…”
“What? You have to admit…” He continues on with the reasons we would need our privacy, but I tune him out because all I hear is Timothy planning thingswithoutTema.
He said he’d take care of her, but he never said he wanted to.
Timothy has never given Tema a bath or asked to help put her to bed. And while not all men are hands-on fathers, he has never once asked about my daughter since I’ve been gone.
“I don’t think I want to marry you,” I whisper.
But Timothy doesn’t hear me and keeps going on about the benefits of making a move.
I have to agree with him there because maybe I was just looking for an excuse to come back. And Timothy gave me a great excuse.
“Timothy,” I interrupt. “I need to say something.”
“Yes, but this place—” Something in my expression finally manages to silence him, and he heaves a sigh. “Really?”
“I think maybe—”
“You’re staying with the prince, aren’t you?”
The fact that he doesn’t even let me say it really irks. “I don’t know if I’m staying with Bo, but I think it’s best that I stayhere. In Laandia. With my family.”
“You hate your family,” he counters.
“Well, maybe it’s time that I stop feeling that way.”
“You tell me you’re staying for your family while the prince is putting you up in a castle? Don’t tell me that’s not the reason.” For the first time since I’ve met him, Timothy sounds angry.
And for a moment, I want him to be angry because it’s a sign that he cares.
But the anger is quick to fade from his eyes, leaving resignation, and it happens too fast for my liking. “Listen, Hettie, you figure things out. You need to do what’s best for you, and I’ll do the same. I thought we would be good for each other—I could help you with your career and you can help with my business—but I can see that’s not going to be enough for you.”