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Mabel kept herself out of trouble—for the most part. Same as Earl. Tommy got out and Hank… Hank probably has a finger in most of the criminal activity between here and Mary’s Harbour but at least he keeps it quiet.
Reggie was smart and funny, always teasing and cracking jokes. He had options and wasted them all.
And I have to pay for it.
I wouldn’t if I went back to Victoria.
My life in Victoria is many things: difficult, lonely, freeing, fun at times. It would have been a very different story if Abigail hadn’t come with me; it also would have been very different if I hadn’t discovered I was pregnant six weeks later.
Having my grandfather there was a lifesaver since we lived with him for the first two years, but he’s an introverted artist preoccupied with colours and landscapes from Laandia. He helped financially but didn’t do anything for a social life.
I’ve loved being away from the shadow of my family, but is that worth being away from my home? And keeping Abigail from her family? I told her so many times that Tema and I would be fine, but either she doesn’t believe me or the ties that keep us together are as strong for her as they are for me.
If Abigail had moved home, I might have followed her.
But I would only be running away, same as before. Then, I thought it would be too hard to keep seeing Bo, so I left. And now? Will it be too difficult to deal with Reggie and his eventual troubles? Should I leave again?
I don’t think so. Maybe that was me eight years ago, but I’m different now. I’ve changed, and there’s no sense hiding from my family or the press—or how I feel about Bo.
Because I do feel about Bo. I feel a lot.
He lights up something inside of me, like a pilot light that’s been dormant for years. He sees me, sees all of me. All the good and all the bad. Bo always said he loves me and doesn’t care about my family, and he proved it by marrying me.
What would happen if I finally believed that?
Or if I stopped caring what anyone else thought about them? Because I am not my family. I’m not my brothers, or my mother, or my uncle who can’t keep his mouth shut even when he doesn’t have a clue what he’s talking about.
I am me—a mother. The mother of a princess, the third in line to the throne of Laandia.
I’m a wife. And because of that, I’m a princess in my own right.
I’m a lot of other things, but they are the most important at this moment.
I walk the length of the pier twice before I pull out my phone.
But I don’t call Abigail to check how things are going.
“Hey!” Timothy smiles as soon as he sees me on the screen. “It looks cold there.”
The wind skips across the water, creating waves that crash into the pier. Occasionally I get splashed, but I keep walking. I’m wearing Lyra’s jacket that is much warmer than the one I brought with me, and I pulled on a toque when I got to the water.
“It’s March, so it’s still pretty cold, but today, you can kind of feel thatspring is coming.”
Timothy frowns. “Your nose is really red, so it doesn’t look like there’s much spring there yet. We’ve already got flowers out here.”
“I know.” British Columbia is a beautiful place to live. It has the water and the mountains, and Victoria has a small-town vibe despite being the capital. It’s been a good place to run to, but—
“You’re just the person I was thinking about,” Timothy says.
“Yeah?” For a moment, my heart gives a squeeze and I wonder if I’m doing the right thing.
“Yeah. I got a new listing and I think it’s perfect for you. A two-bedroom condo in West Van overlooking the water. There’s a school nearby—”
“Vancouver?” The squeezing of my heart stops abruptly. “I don’t want to move to Vancouver.”
“We talked about how it would be better for my career to get off the island,” he reminds me.
“Youtalked.”