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Emotion burns my eyes for an entirely different reason. It means the absolute world to me that my parents stepped in to make Ashley feel safe and comfortable when I couldn’t. They’re starting to come around and it matters.

It matters so, so much.

“Thank you.”

“Go see your girl. We’ll talk in the morning and get everything sorted out. I love you, Gavin.”

“Love you, Dad.”

Mom and Ashley are sitting on the bed in the guest room with their hands wrapped around steaming mugs of tea, talking in hushed voices.

When Ashley spots me, she jumps up and sets the mug on the dresser, immediately running into my arms.

“I was so worried,” she says against my throat. “Did you get him?”

“No. But I will.”

Mom rises from the bed and gives both of us a hug before saying good-night.

“I’m so sorry about Scout,” she says. “We loved him so much.”

I nod, not able to get any more words out tonight. My heart has been through the wringer, and all I want to do now is crash.

After Mom leaves the room, Ashley says, “This is all my fault. Do you hate me?”

“Not even close, babe. Not even close.”

“But Scout is dead and it’s because ofme.”

“It isn’t,” I insist. “It’s his fault, whoever he is.”

“They want to scare me out of the state and it’s working,” Ashley says, with tears in her eyes. “Not that I was staying long-term anyway, but now I want to leave sooner than planned.”

“Terrible idea,” I mutter against her lips.

“I’m scared.”

“I’m here, babe. Don’t be scared.”

She peels my clothes off and then loses her own, taking my hand and leading me into the ensuite bathroom.

We stand under the hot water of the shower for a long time, just holding each other. My mind is racing, but my body is exhausted from walking miles through the snow and then the subsequent adrenaline crash.

Her hands are all over my body, massaging the soap into my skin and shampoo into my hair while I just stand there with my eyes closed, appreciating her.

If only this night could wash away.

“You’re so good to me, babe,” I groan.

“That’s because I love you,” she whispers, but I can barely make out her voice over the water falling on top of us.

There’s no way I heard her right.

I’m emotionally wrought and heard what I wanted to hear.

Needed to hear.

My entire body tenses and my eyes pop open, suddenly wide awake and very alert.