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“In the beginning, she was the best mommy ever. We used to do everything together. Hell, I don’t know when Joe Lee came around but as far back as I can remember, he was there. We had pictures with him from when I was a baby, so I guess he’d been there from the beginning.
Up until he touched me, Joe Lee and I never had any issues. He used to take me to the park to play. We traveled as a unit and everything. When the switch up happened, Gema said Joe Lee brain was poisoned and that’s what made him do those things.”
“Poisoned how?”
“Joe Lee got bipolar disorder.”
“’Oh…” I hummed. “Wow… Yeah I wouldn’t have known that.”
“Nobody does. He takes medicine for it. So yeah, Gema said his mind was poisoned and that caused him to flip the way he did.”
“I don’t think that’s one of the characteristics of bipolar disorder, Talitha.”
“I know that,” she tittered. “Another one of Gema’s analogies. Joe Lee just rotten at the core. His mental condition has nothing to do with him sneaking into my bedroom at night, putting his hands on me. His ass had been around me for years, ain’t no telling how long he’d been watching me.” She shrugged.
“Your uncle that lives out of town?”
“Meat? What about him?”
“Why isn’t he more involved?”
“The fat muthafucka don’t come home. Lowkey, I think he’s embarrassed of all of this.” Her hand waved through the air. “Meat act like he had a bad life. Gema and Papa Joe worked they ass off to provide all of us with stability. Granted they might not have had much but they made do with what they did have. Meat went off to college and never looked back.”
“Your family is uh–” I paused to try and figure out how I wanted to put it without unintentionally offending her.
“Fucked up,” she chimed in, finishing my statement for me.
“I wasn’t going to say fucked up but different, for sure.”
“Yeah, that’s us… the Howard’s. What you see is what you get.” Her shoulders lifted passively.
“So other than what happened to you, you’ve had a rather fair life?”
“If you wanna call spending years sitting on a couch talking to a therapist fair, then I guess I have.”
“Given everything that you’ve endured, fair would be the best way to describe it. Could it have been better? Of course, however, we can’t control the mess that we’re born into.”
“And I really was born into some shit. Parts of me wished they’d let her get rid of me. Then maybe she wouldn’t hate me as much as she do.”
“She doesn’t hate. That’s easy to tell. I picked up on it the first time I saw her. She’s jealous of you, and jealousy is an ugly trait for someone to carry.That’sthe reason she mistreats you.”
“Hate… Jealous. In my eyes, it’s all the same. If I was to die right now and Gema was unable to make any decisions on my behalf, I’m positive my Mama would have them folks cremate my ass and toss my ashes out on the side of the road.”
“You do know that you don’t need her.” A part of me felt like Talitha sought validation from her mom. Like deep down inside she wanted her to notice the sacrifices that she made and offer some type of appreciation. That jealousy and resentment she held toward her wouldn’t allow her to show anything remotely close to love.
“Of course, I know I don’tneedher. Is it hard seeing and talking to her knowing she has this strong disdain for me, and I’ve never done anything to deserve it? You are absolutely fucking right. I don’tneedanybody. I’ve long realized that, Law.” Closing the container, she tossed it in the trash before suggesting. “My need for people vanished the day she took his word over mine.”
Making her way back to the bed, she sat on the side and grabbed her phone off the nightstand. Her eyes danced across the screen a few minutes before she blew out a yawn. “I’m going to bed. I wanna be at the bank as soon as they open.”
“I’m right behind you,” I let her know and tossed my own container away.
“You got everything?”
“I sure do. Since I have no plans on coming back here after Gema is home, I decided to return the key. I won’t needit after what I have planned for them.” Talitha’s alarm went off at eight on the dot. After getting breakfast, the two of us got dressed and headed down to the bank. While she handled her business inside, I called my assistant to check on everything. I didn’t want Talitha to feel like I was hovering, so I let her do her own thing.
When she walked out of the bank, she had a few of those blue leather bags they used to pass out back in the day and her face had the biggest smile on it to date.
“Which is what?” I asked after slipping in the car beside her.