Page 152

“Marriage? You strike me as that sentimental?”
I was lying, of course. I had Emmy’s engagement ring in my pocket right now. However, I was barely comfortable acknowledging my emotional need for Emmy to myself. Admitting it to someone else was completely intolerable.
Katya laughed out loud. “You’ve got to be kidding me, Ivan. You’d have to be blind not to notice your feelings for Emmy. I thought marrying would be the least intense option for you, since I doubt she’d allow you to become surgically attached.”
I snorted. “I’m not quite that bad, but I get your point. I don’t want to upstage your day with any announcements.”
Her eyebrows popped up in surprise. “Announcements? You already asked her?
“No, but I bought a ring for her.” I reached into my pocket to show her the small, velvet box.
Katya brought her hands to her mouth, her eyes glistening again. “You’re carrying it around? Oh my god, that’s so sweet. You love her so much.”
My face felt hot. “Jesus, Katya, don’t say that shit,” I grumbled with discomfort.
She walked closer to me and grabbed each of my hands in hers. “Look at us, Ivan. Look at what we’ve overcome. We have each other, we have amazing, loving partners, we have supportive friends who are like family. Mom would be so proud, so overjoyed at what we’ve created.”
A ball of fire lodged in my throat as I struggled to contain the emotions Katya’s words evoked. But she was right. Our mother would be filled with delight and satisfaction at what we overcame to allow love into our lives. Back into our lives because we had love once. Her love. We’d had a memorial for her and Nikolai’s mom, recovering their bodies and burying them properly. It had been a rough day, but now I felt like I could actually remember her without the weight of pain and anger that typically accompanied memories of her. I could remember the woman I loved and not be crushed by her loss.
“Yes,” I rasped out. Eager to change the topic, I asked, “Are you ready to go?” After this emotional moment with my sister, just hearing Emmy’s music made me eager to see her again.
“Yes, I’m ready,” she said, slipping her arm through mine. I felt a quick moment of resistance, but it quickly faded. I had come so far regarding touch since I’d started letting Emmy introduce it to me again.
As I walked my sister toward her soon-to-be husband, I realized it wasn’t just her celebration, but mine as well. I was surrounded by my friends, my family and the love of my life.
Life used to be an endless, empty void filled with obligations to the Bratva while holding on to pain, bitterness and trauma. It was now filled with Emmy’s harp music, her beautiful face, her loving touch, the laughter of our family and friends. My life was full almost beyond comprehension, beyond my wildest imagination.
As we turned the corner, she came into sight. My Emmy. My neposlushnaya devochka. Her beautiful face was full of bliss and joy as she plucked Pachelbel’s Canon in D on her harp, overjoyed to be part of my sister’s wedding. God, I fucking adored her.
As I walked Katya down the aisle, I should have been looking at Drago, but I couldn’t look away from Emmy. The ring box burned a hole in my pocket, and I knew sooner, rather than later I’d be asking her to marry me. In fact, I might not make it through the fucking ceremony the way I was feeling.
We arrived at the altar, and I turned and gave Katya a kiss on the cheek. “Congratulations, Katya.”
Katya leaned in to give me a hug. “Thank you. I can’t wait to have a new sister,” Katya said, as if my intentions were plastered all over my face.
“I can wait until after your wedding,” I grumbled, belying my previous mental musings.
I held out my hand to Drago, which he readily shook. “Take care of her.”
“Always,” he replied solemnly.
With a nod, I stepped back and watched my sister marry the head of the Chicago Bratva, knowing that I would have Emmy at this altar before too long.
I could hardly wait