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“Men are simple,” she begins. “They have the ability to be brilliant—Enlightened—but they are easily distracted by needs and desires woven into their biological nature. They are ruled by their bodies. It’s what’s kept them alive and evolving since the beginning of time. That instinct, that drive for creation, is what built Serendee. But it must be harnessed. Regressive thoughts are always seeking to take over. That’s why Anex leads these men. He is there to keep them on the path. To help them follow The Way. But Anex cannot do it alone.”

“He needs us,” a girl near me murmurs.

“Yes,” Nadine says with a serious expression. “Our leader needs you to do your part to keep your men healthy, happy, and productive. For the Betterment of Serendee.” She walks around the fire pit, making eye contact with each one of us. I remember her doing this in school. Back then it always felt personal. Now it just feels intimidating. “They will need to be fed, which I assume you are already doing. They will need you to use your ears—tolisten. Communication is good, but our roles are specific in Serendee. Anex’s commands are what keeps our community running smoothly. He doesn’t need your input on duties and jobs. He needs you to run interference with those needs and desires.”

Everyone here has lived with their Ordered for months now. It’s doubtful that anyone is unclear about what she is speaking of. It’s not forbidden to lay with your Ordered, not after the ceremony declaring intentions. My fingers reach instinctively for the leather bracelet that I’d worn after Rex and I went through the process. It’s gone. Stripped from me like everything else.

A girl across the firepit named Deena looks at Maria, eyes darting down to her belly. “What was it like?”

Maria blushes, but she’s unable to pretend otherwise, the evidence of fornication pressing at her abdomen.

“It was fast,” she admits with a shy smile. “Hurt a little, but you get used to it.”

“Did it feel good?” one of the girls asks.

“It didn’t feel bad.”

“Then it sounds like he didn’t do it right,” someone whispers, loud. Too loud.

Nadine shoots her a glare. “Maria’s pleasure isn’t a priority.”

“Why are you asking me?” Maria says cheeks dark red. “Imogene is the one with experience of having been withfourmen.”

Every eye in the room swings to me, and I busy myself by taking a sip of tea. It’s bitter, but warm, and I take another drink. Maria’s outburst about me isn’t new information. They were all there when my Collateral was exposed for the entire community to hear. When Anex lied about instructing me to train with Rex’s friends to prepare myself to be a better mate. He hadn’t been specific though, just that what I’d done had been enough to send me to Reeducation.

Nadine’s eyes narrow. “Stories from the Fallen shouldn’t be used as an example.”

“Telling her story is part of the purification process. She must purge her past Regressions,” Margaret says, eyes twinkling in the firelight. “Tell us, Imogene, what was it like to allow four Regressive men to have their way with you? To let them defile you in any way they want outside the sanctity of Anex’s Order.”

My gaze holds Margaret’s, fully aware of what she’s trying to do to me. She’s always trying to break me down. Tear me to nothing so that I’ll relent and become the passive mate Anex wants so badly. She wants me to tarnish the memory of my men, betray them in front of the masses to belittle what we had.

I lift my chin. “No.”

“No?”

“No. I’m not going to tell you about my relationships.”

Margaret’s eyebrow raises. “I remember you coming to me, eyes red from crying all night after being forced to your knees by Rex.”

I remember that day, too. Clear as crystal. Rex had forced me to suck his cock at the club. I’d been humiliated. Naïve. Margaret had been an ally then—or pretended to be. She’d soothed my sore eyes and talked me through the pain. She gave me advice. Clearly all of that was a set up. Everything is a set up—probably including this.

“Rex is—was—my Ordered. I was only pleasing my future mate.”

“What about the desires you have during Corrections? When you found pleasure while being strapped by Levi? Or when Levi couldn’t finish the job, he sent Elon in to finish it.”

I see the jaw drop on a girl across from me, and the person sitting closest to me shifts away. I inhale in an attempt to steady myself. I look around the room at the innocent, naïve women who have no idea what they are getting into. No more than I did.

“Fine, you want to know? I’ll tell you.” I straighten my back. My tongue feels loose and I’m tired of hiding who I’ve become. “At first, it was a challenge, because the men assigned to train me were raised as the Chosen. Part of Serendee led by a man who believes all this nonsense Nadine is spewing. About serving men and meeting their needs and desires to keep their Regressive thoughts in line.” I roll my eyes. “Men are horny, plain and simple. They want to get their cocks into something warm all the time. They want to get their cock intoyouall the time.”

“Imogene!” Maria gasps, but I’m too busy thinking about Rex hurting me that first time. And how Silas took the time to take care of me and educate me about all of this confusing stuff. How to enjoy it. I think about that first kiss with Elon and the relief he gave me after Corrections with Levi. And Levi… well, he showed me a side I didn’t know existed.

“Having a man worship you is fantastic. Havingfourmen worship me was fucking outstanding.” Around the fire, wide eyed girls listen to my every word. Even though I know I should stop, I can’t seem to do it. “For the record, that is what it’s called. Fucking. They fuck you with their cocks, burying it deep into your pussy. If you’re lucky it’s big and thick and yeah, it hurts like hell the first time, but after that…” God, I miss them. We didn’t get enough time together before we’d been torn apart. “…it’s good. Complicated and really, really good.”

“Imogene,” Nadine says, “I think that’s enough.”

“Agreed.” I stand, done with this little circle of truth. “I hope your men treat you right.” Blood rushes to my head as I step forward and my eyes swim. The teacup falls to the floor, shattering into a million pieces. “Wha—?” I ask, but the words get lost. The faces around me blur, and the last thing I remember is reaching out to steady myself and the world turning black.

Open your eyes.