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“I’m sorry,” Colter says, meaning every word. His anger is not aimed at her or her words. It’s for the destructive butterfly that has sliced us open, leaving us to die under the rays of the sun at Furnace Creek.

She wipes the tears building in her watery eyes. “It’s okay,” she sighs. “I understand the pain and anger.”

Guilt gnaws at me. I hate to see my mom anything but happy. And hurting Eva—that’s a bridge with all the warning signs not to cross. Or your hairs standing on edge, telling you not to enter the dark woods on a cold rainy night. Both would be no-go zones to most, but it’s all green lights ahead for us.

I pause, weigh the collateral cost of this path to revenge. They do say when you seek revenge, dig two holes. I can only pray that at the end of this, we don’t lose our mother.

Shaking my head clear, I refocus my attention to the screen.

My mom grabs a tissue and wipes her nose before she gives us a plasticky smile. “Okay, I need to pack.”

“Where to this time?” I inquire, steering the conversation away from the choppy waters of despair.

Her face lights. “Sumba.”

“Why Indonesia?” Colt questions.

“Girls trip. Time for some relaxation.”

A genuine grin lines my face. “Well deserved, Mom. Have fun.”

“Will do, Sweet-ah-roo.”

“Oh God. It’s time to go. She’s rhyming now, Coop.”

Laughing, she affectionately says, “‘Uhibuk 'akthar min alqalb.”

I love you beyond the heart—a phrase we use to say goodbye, especially after a difficult or hurtful conversation.

“‘Uhibuk 'akthar min alqalb,” Colter and I say.

He ends the call, sighing as we spin to face each other. “We need to move this plan along, Mom is beginning to get suspicious, and we can’t have everything we’ve planned for the last few years go to shit because our mother has a soft spot for our sister’s killer.”

He’s right. Mom would throw more than a fit if she gets even an inkling that we’re out to hurt Eva. She’d undeservingly rally around her, shielding her from all harm. The idea of that burns a hole in my gut.

Standing, I grab my hoodie and stride for the door. We can’t let that happen.I can’t let that happen. This is a blood debt, and Eva will pay in blood. She doesn’t get to wriggle her nose, as cute as it may be, out of this.

“Where are you going?” Colter growls. “We have important shit to do.”

Without looking back, I retort, “To turn things up ten notches.”

37

eva

“Where the helldid you disappear to Friday night?” Jade asks as we leave practice.

Fixing my bun, I reply, “I got so messy, I needed to go home and shower.”

She hums, but her side-eye lets me know she’s not buying my bullshit. Well, too bad for her because I’m not telling them I was fucked in the best way before being robbed of the best orgasm. I will take this to my grave.

“At least she texted before she ghosted this time,” Paisley snarks. “Where does your delectable ass keep disappearing to anyway?”

“You love my ass, Pais?” I tease, rubbing it against her thigh. It’s a maneuver to redirect the conversation away from anything Jacobi-related.

I can’t share anything about my relationship with Colt and Coop.

Is it a relationship? What the fuck am I even doing?I internally groan at my confusion. I’m surrendering to the brothers of the best friend I killed.