Page 21

Ayana shakes her head, “Not where my family is from. We actually have pretty temperate weather due to the high altitude.”

Paisley hums her understanding as Jade reminds us that we need to get moving.

We’re halfway down the sidewalk when someone screams my name. Not recognizing the voice, I spin to see who it could be, just as something is splashed in my face. The action catches me off guard, so my mouth is open, and I swallow before I can attempt to spit.

Liquid slides down my forehead, dripping into my eyes, forcing them closed as I gag.

“Murderer,” someone shouts, and my heart rate kicks up.

No… no… no… this can’t be happening.

I try desperately to wipe at my skin, but I’m completely drenched.

“Killer,” another person screams as the revolting scent of blood fills my nostrils. I immediately breathe out to expel what I had accidentally inhaled in my shock.

I freeze, unable to get my brain to send the signals to my feet to move or speak to defend myself.

“Do your friends know the survival rate of being associated with you?”

But what are you defending? You killed her.

“Hey,” Camiel shouts. “What fuck is wrong with you? Is this fucking blood?”

I don’t hear anything after that. My feet finally move, and I take off, refusing to look back as I ignore my name being called and all the people standing around gawking.

When I look up, my hand is on the doorknob of my building, and I swear I see Colter and Cooper, but a sea of students laughing forces me forward.

Absentmindly, I dash up the stairs, entering my suite. Tears stream down my face as I strip out of my clothes, tossing them in the trash. I don’t know what type of blood this is, so I hop inthe shower and turn the water to damn near scalding, refusing to leave until every crevice is clean.

“What did you expect, Eva Rose?” I huff, scrubbing my body raw.

“Eva,” Jade calls, but I can’t answer. The pain is roaring, forcing me into silence.How can it be so loud and so quiet at the same time?I only know one way to find my voice again.

I hear Jade bickering with Camiel before the door to my bathroom opens. “Eva, it’s Cammy. We just want to—fuck I don’t know. Asking if you’re okay is a dumb-as-shit question.”

She’s not wrong there.

Sticking my hand out of the shower, I give her a thumbs up.

“Are you sure?” Camiel probes, and I stick it up again. She sighs and says, “Fine, but I’ll be back after class.”

I still don’t speak, but as soon as the door clicks shut, I fall to the floor and sob. I cry until I’m hiccuping, and my throat becomes raw.

How do they know?

I am grateful to the shower for hiding my cowardice, but it’s not enough.

Standing, I turn off the faucet, step out of the shower, and grab my towel. Then, I move on autopilot until I’m in front of my desk.

Yanking it open, I reach into the far back, pulling out the box of mechanical pencils where I keep my razor blade before flopping onto my bed, not caring that I’m still soaking wet.

I roll the towel up and expose my left hip, pausing momentarily to study the healed scars, focusing on the most recent thin, short line that matches with so many others. They almost look the same color as my skin. It’s funny the parts of your body that can regenerate repeatedly.

How I wish like hell the gaping hole inside my chest could heal itself.

My fingers tremble until I feel the cold touch of the razor pierce my skin. The kiss of the cool metal against my hot flesh is euphoric, and I hum, lost in the nothingness… in the void where nothing can touch me.

The weight of everything slips away, and my eyes roll back, allowing the pain of today to bleed away.