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“You’re definitely good for him. Me? I don’t know.”
“What do you mean? You were the only one on his side for years.”
She shook her head again. “After I asked him to keep a secret that alienated him. All of it because of a man who didn’t treat me like I was worth anything. God, I should have listened to Mirabelle when she told me who he was. Maybe then I could have ...” She trailed off, eyes back on the ground.
“Could have what?”
“Given Cain the family he needed.”
“Butyou’refamily to him.”
“Not the kind he deserves. I hurt him in the end.”
“You made a choice that hurt him, yes. But you’ve also done good things. Like standing up for him in front of Kerry. Watching Eric when he asked you to. Being here for him whenheneeded it.”
“But—”
“No, Jackie.” I turned to her and grabbed her hands. “Family isn’t being perfect all the time. Family is messy. We hurt each other. We make stupid choices, but in the end, we’re here for one another. And that’s what you do.”
“I ... You’re right. Mirabelle must have taught you that.”
“Not in words. She’s a good mom, but ... she’s not perfect. None of us are. But if you’re here and supporting Cain and Eric when they come down those stairs, you’re doing exactly what you should be.”
She smiled at me, her eyes watery. “You are one smart girl, you know that?”
“You should have seen me when climbing on the roof to get Hennifer. I wasnotsmart then.”
“Still.” She pulled me into a tight hug. “I’m happy Cain has you.”
“He always will,” I said, and I meant it. More than he could ever know.
“Have you talked to her? Your mom?”
My stomach fell. “Not really. She said she didn’t wanna watch me make a choice she couldn’t support. And I’m obviously still making that choice.”
“A choice she couldn’t support? It’s not like you’re staying with your abusive ex.”
“I think Strawberry Springs feels similar to an abusive ex to her. She doesn’t see it like I do.”
Jackie’s shoulders drooped. “I suppose I’m a bit at fault for that.”
“She’ll come around.” I tried to smile, but it didn’t reach my eyes. “Hopefully.”
“You have me if she doesn’t.” Jackie’s hand landed on my shoulder. “She might be stubborn, but you’re her daughter. She has to still care.”
I opened my mouth to say I hoped she did, but Cain camedown the stairs carrying Eric, who had tear-stained cheeks. Both Jackie and I jumped into action, trying to offer support.
Eric was a resilient kid, and by the end of the night, he was smiling again. He said he didn’t want to go, but he would if he had to.
Cain, on the other hand? He was miserable, and I hated to see it.
Hated it more than anything.
34
CAIN
Strawberry Springs Neighborhood Watch