Page 37 of 500 First Editions (The Romantics #3)

HAVEN

Let’s talk intimacy.

I know what you’re thinking. Finally . We’re going to talk about sex. Making love. Getting lucky. Knocking boots. Fucking. Banging.

Hate to break it to you, but intimacy and sex aren’t always synonymous.

The kind of intimacy we’re talking about isn’t something you can bang out in a night.

It’s the kind of connection that you’ve spent the last six weeks cultivating.

A feeling of closeness and intrinsic trust you don’t even have to think about.

By now, I hope that you have laid the groundwork for open and honest communication.

Talking is one of the greatest forms of intimacy. It seems obvious, but spending time talking to your partner about your hopes and fears, your dreams and goals, and what keeps you up at night is imperative. You should also discuss what you want your life together and individually to look like.

Now, I know what you’re thinking—seven weeks is pretty fast to start talking about the future. I’m not saying you need to be talking rings and wedding dates and his-and-hers hand towels. But now is a good time to ask those questions.

Happily ever after looks different for everyone.

Some people want the white dress and big wedding. Some people don’t believe in the institution of marriage. Do you both want kids? Is living close to family something that’s important to you, or would you like to move somewhere new? Are you fulfilled in your jobs? What brings you joy in life?

Plan a night with no distractions, where the two of you can share the things that you typically keep secret. Don’t treat it like an ambush. It’s important to remember that, for your partner to feel comfortable opening up to you, you have to open up to them.

Being vulnerable with someone is uncomfortable, especially in a relationship. It seems counterintuitive, because your partner should be the one person you can be most open with. But most people don’t want to appear weak in a relationship. They want to maintain the high ground.

Intimacy is closeness. You’re not running a gauntlet, trying to outmatch each other. It’s not about seeing how big of a return you can get with minimal effort. Partnership is about mutual effort, investment, and outcome.

This challenge isn’t for the faint of heart. Spending an evening talking might seem like a cake walk, but if you really want to have true intimacy with your partner, talking is the minimum.

Anyone can talk. Sharing is where it gets hard.

Turn off your phone and get rid of the distractions. It’s time to empty your emotional bank account. Are you ready?