Page 51 of Write Me For You
June
M y hand shook as I wrote the two words that I wasn’t sure I would ever get to— The End .
My hand fell to the bed, and I sucked in a much-needed breath from my oxygen mask.
Turning, I ran my hand over the place where Jesse used to sleep.
Two days—he had been gone for two days and I didn’t think it was possible to miss someone so much.
I barely slept, I couldn’t eat, and my body had begun to fail.
His cap rested on his pillow, the scent awarding me with a miniscule amount of comfort.
But I had worked hard to get our happily ever after finished.
I smoothed my hand over the notebook, and a sense of accomplishment washed over me.
“I’ve done it, baby,” I whispered into the empty room.
“I’ve given us the happily ever after that I promised us.
” I closed my eyes and could see his wide smile. I could feel him lean in and kiss me.
I’m so proud of you, Junebug.
My parents had just gone out to get a drink, and as I felt myself begin to sink into the mattress, I hoped they’d come back soon. My breaths were coming slower, but I smiled as I saw Ginger move to the fence near our porch.
The stars were shining in the sky, and the night was still. A perfect Texan night. My bedroom door opened, and my mama and daddy walked in. I didn’t know what they saw when they looked at me, but they rushed to my bedside.
Mama sat on mattress beside me. Tears filled her eyes.
“I’ve finished,” I said, voice barely audible.
Mama nodded, placing her hand on my notebook and leaning down to kiss my head. “I love you,” she whispered.
Daddy sat down too. “Is there anything you want, darlin’?” he asked.
I looked at the beautiful horse outside again. “Can you take me to see Ginger?”
Daddy stared at me a touch too long. He knew what I was saying—that I wanted to say my goodbyes.
“Of course,” he said, voice gravelly. Daddy scooped me up in his arms and placed me in my wheelchair.
Mama opened the doors, and I let the warm Texas breeze wash over me.
It felt like silk being brushed over my cheeks.
Daddy pushed me out to the porch, and I glanced at the egg chair that held so many memories.
If I closed my eyes, I could feel the back-and-forth sway of Jesse and I wrapped in one another’s arms, sharing our dreams. Sharing our words and drawings…
Sharing our hearts.
Ginger whinnied at the fence, and my daddy pushed me toward him. As I reached the fence, Ginger bent his head over, and I lifted my hands and ran them down his face. “Thank you for being here for me,” I said, and kissed him on the head. “I’ll miss you.”
I patted Ginger until my arm ached and I had no more strength. With a final kiss to the beloved horse, my daddy helped me back into my chair.
“Wait,” I said, and held up my hand. I pointed up at the star that I now felt belonged to me and Jesse.
My parents were quiet for a spell as we watched it sparkle, until my daddy said, “We’ll always look at that star and know it belongs to you and Jesse, darlin’. We’ll search for it every night for the rest of our lives to keep you close to our hearts.”
Imagining my parents doing that, from our beloved home, filled me with happiness. But then, “I’m tired, Daddy,” I said, and heard his quick inhale.
My mama took my hand, and we walked silently back to my bedroom. Daddy lifted me from my chair, and as he placed me down on the bed and tucked me under the covers, I took hold of his hands. “I love you,” I whispered. “Thank you for being my daddy.”
He lowered his head and his shoulders shook.
I turned to my mama, who was lying on the edge of the bed beside me. I pushed a strand of hair from her face. “You’re the best mama I could have wished for. Thank you for loving me so much.”
Mama shook her head. “You have been a dream.” She kissed my head. “Rest easy, sweetheart. You deserve some peace.”
I smiled and let sweet numbness wash through me.
My eyes grew heavy, and I began to feel the tempting pull of sleep.
But just as my eyes closed, I caught sight of the picture of Jesse and I on the porch, our dream etched out in charcoal.
My heart swelled, knowing that I’d given that dream to the Jesse and June in our Happily Ever After.
Out there, in that universe, we were living that dream.
My breathing got slower and my eyes drifted closed. I held out my hand as I sank further and further into painlessness, only to feel a familiar hand wrap around mine.
He squeezed it twice.
And my heart swelled with happiness.
He had kept his promise.