Page 31 of Wrap Around (Forbidden Goals #7)

GIDEON

"Because she accepted me."

No matter how many times I repeat his words over and over in my head, I can't make sense of them.

"Because she accepted me."

What does that mean?

"Because she accepted me."

Does he mean that she knows he likes men?

Are they about to tell me they have an open marriage?

Because, zero judgement, but that is absolutely not going to do anything to make me feel better about this situation.

They can do whatever they want, but I'm not going to be in some kind of throuple situation with my sister and her husband. That crosses a line for me.

The more I think about it, the more I'm positive that's the only thing it could be.

The entire six-hour flight home, I stew in silence, thinking about how I'm going to be able to beat the ever-loving shit out of Silas without making my sister feel like I'm judging her.

Because, honestly, I'm not. She can be with whoever and however many people she wants to.

I could not care less about my sister's sex life.

I really, really don't want to know about it at all, actually.

But Silas thinking it's okay to try and juggle us both is pissing me off. In fact, I have a strong feeling that Lily won't be okay with it, either. Maybe she's fine with him liking dick, but I don't think she'd be okay with him liking my dick specifically.

Oh, God. What if he wants us to have some kind of three way with him in the middle? Or what if he wants to go back and forth, and just hop in my bed after he's been in hers?

Gross.

I spend a good amount of the flight scowling at him and imagining all the ways I'm going to kick his ass.

The one good thing about this scenario is that I feel positive it'll put me right off of Silas Caldwell.

This is about to be the quickest way to fall out of love, because I won't be able to look at him.

It won't be enough to move three thousand miles away to a different country.

We'll need to be on different continents.

Only, it won't be because I'll be too heartbroken to watch them move on with their lives.

It'll be because I'm so disgusted and enraged that I might become capable of murder.

Poor Lily is going to have to find her baby a new daddy, because I will fucking end him.

Am I overreacting? Maybe. But if I can get the worst-case scenario worked out in my head beforehand, maybe I won't land myself in jail or make my sister feel like shit for her shitty taste in men. That we apparently share.

What the actual fuck is happening?!

The closer we get to home, the more agitated I become. Which is how I end up drinking two double scotches in the last half hour before landing .

This, of course, means I can't drive myself home or back to Lily and Silas' house.

I'm in control of my faculties enough to know this isn't a good idea tonight.

While, yes, I'm likely to just work myself up even more, I need at least a night to process and come to terms with this, so I don't throw a nuclear tantrum and murder my brother-in-law in front of his wife and child.

I try to call for a rideshare to take me home. I'll get a ride back to my truck tomorrow and then head over to face my fate after I've calmed down.

Silas is having none of it, though. That bastard has the audacity to laugh at me as he steers me to his stupid car.

"Why the fuck do you drive this piece of shit Subaru, anyway?"

"Because I decided to put a large down payment on a nice house with my signing bonus," he says, gesturing at the houses around us as we pull into their neighborhood. "We put the rest in savings and investments in case I don't get renewed."

I decide not to remark about how surprisingly spacious it is inside. Considering the size of the car, I assumed I'd be cramped, but I might actually have more legroom than I do in my truck.

"You invest?"

"Technically, Lily does. You realize that your sister is basically a genius, right?"

"Can't be too smart if she let herself get knocked up by your dumbass," I mutter, but it comes out louder than I intended. I nearly get whiplash from how hard Silas stomps on the breaks. The tires slide on the slick road before coming to a halt.

"If I ever hear you say something like that again, I don't care how much I love you, I'll break your face. And if she hears you say it, I'll cut your fucking tongue out and display it as a warning. "

My head rears back in disbelief. I've never, in my whole life, heard Silas talk to or about anyone like that. And considering he just spent an entire weekend trying to convince me that he loves me, I'm more than a little afraid.

"I didn't mean it," I say, feeling incredibly sober all of sudden.

In fact, if my churning stomach is any indication, I might have moved on to the hangover phase already.

"It was a bad joke. I'm sorry." My eyes ache with how wide open I'm holding them, afraid to blink the wrong way with him looking at me like that.

"Lily is incredibly sensitive about that particular topic, and for good reason. Never joke about it, please." He waits until I nod my agreement before he continues onto their street and pulls into the drive.

I think about what Lily had told me before, about how uninformed she'd been about sex and how babies were made.

At the time, I'd overreacted and thought it meant that Silas had taken advantage of her.

Now I don't know what to think, but I do feel ashamed of the joke, even if I didn't mean it the way it came out.

As we climb out of Silas' ugly but reliable family vehicle that might actually be a Tardis in disguise, I realize that I am in a state far worse than sober or too drunk to process my feelings.

I've reached a state of anxiety that has me frozen in place.

If not for the rock salt and sand mixture spread on the driveway, I might simply slide down the driveway and sink into a snow bank. I might prefer it there, honestly.

Silas notices that I've fallen behind and turns back to pull my arm up the driveway.

"Gideon, I realize that the past three and a half years have been really shitty and this is a tough ask, but I'm going to ask you to trust me.

I'm not going to pretend that this conversation is going to magically fix everything, but I am promising you it will help.

I'm promising you it's going to be okay.

And I promise that Lily and I aren't swingers or trying to talk you into whatever weird shit you've been working yourself up over all day. "

I squint my eyes, and he laughs again.

"The way you were glaring at me from across the plane, there were only a few things it could have been."

He tries to pull me forward, but I'm still stuck. I've never been more afraid than I am right now. It's like I'm standing on the edge of some vast drop-off, afraid to fall even though I know I'll die if I don't learn to fly.

Silas' hazel eyes meet mine, the light around us making them shine so they're more tan than gold. I can see the green of my eyes reflected in them, too. I've never seen eyes like his before.

His hand falls down my arm and slips into mine, entwining our fingers together.

I tense, wanting to look around to check that no one sees, but I can't take my eyes off his.

Twisting his lips up on one side, he takes a few steps backwards, and I step forward, following him.

It reminds me of that day we kissed at the lake, the way he looked at me like he knew the answers and just took control.

Before I know it, Silas is closing the door behind us, shutting out the cold.

The warmth of the house starts thawing my skin immediately.

Once Silas has removed both our coats and brushed the snow out of my hair, he steps out of his boots and waits for me to do the same.

I have a feeling he'd get down and take them off for me but now doesn't seem like the right time to get aroused.

When I turn around, Lily is standing in the entryway to the kitchen, arms wrapped around herself. She looks scared and vulnerable, her eyes red and puffy.

"Nice sweater," I say, nodding to the oversized sweatshirt with the words "Bad MAMAjama" across the front in slightly crooked, off-center letters.

She huffs a laugh and steps forward to wrap her arms around my waist. I squeeze her back and bend my neck to kiss the top of my head.

"Do you remember what you told me on Christmas?" I ask. "You told me that there was nothing in this world that would keep you from loving me. No matter what."

She looks up, her green eyes stark in her red-rimmed eyes. "I meant it," she says. "I meant every word."

"I'm gonna believe you about that, but I need you to believe me that I feel the same. Whatever truths we're about to unleash on each other, you need to know that. It doesn't matter what the hell is going on, I will never turn my back on you, or love you less, little sister."

Lily buries her face in my chest and sobs. I hold her while she shakes and snots in my sweater. Eventually, she pulls away, wiping her nose and laughing at the mess she left behind.

"I'll go grab you another sweater," Silas says.

"No need," Lily croaks, walking into the kitchen.

We follow her, and I have to smile at the craft explosion that is taking up the entirety of their dining area.

There are piles of clothes, hats, wooden slabs, and all manner of stuff all over the table, hanging over chairs, and in boxes on the floor.

"Don't you dare judge me," she says, pointing at each of us in turn.

Both Silas and I hold our hands up in surrender.

A hoodie gets thrown at my face. "Don't worry, I did a better job on that one than I did mine. "