Page 4

A s the weeks passed, I began to feel more comfortable at Benedict Technologies. Not so much around Adrian, but with the rhythm of the office and the workflow. I had also made a few social connections, which made me feel better.

In addition to Andi, I had become friendly with Colin, Steph, and a few others. Everyone was very nice and welcoming, though they were very careful not to linger at my desk or take up too much of my time. There seemed to be an unspoken rule that Adrian didn’t like time to be wasted. He didn’t care if people were friendly and talked in the office, of course, but the main purpose was to work.

The man had a lot of work, too. I had no idea how he kept up with it all. So many time zones, contacts, and languages. I considered myself lucky when he would signal me to stay while he was on a call. He would give me a translation unit so I could monitor the meeting and take notes. Hearing him speak rapid-fire Japanese like a native gave me a whole new level of respect for the man. Not to mention, it was hot as fuck.

“Hey, Brynn, you’re still going to help us with the office Halloween party, right?”

I looked up to see Colin and Andi smiling at me expectantly. I nodded. “Of course. I love that sort of thing. What have you guys done in the past?”

A look passed between the two. “Um, basically a catered lunch and a Halloween themed dessert. Some people would wear costumes, but that was about it.”

I was shocked. Halloween was kind of a big deal at my old company. I had plans. Boy, did I have plans.

“Okay,” I started. “Costume contests are a must. We can have individual and department themed if there are enough entrants, so sign-ups are necessary. Halloween dessert contest. Pumpkin carving contest. We’ll need judges for that. Oh! And maybe we can put together some games for prizes? We’ll see what HR will allow…”

“Oh my god, that all sounds so great. Can we meet after work and go over details?” Andi asked.

We made arrangements to meet up closer to my place at a dog-friendly restaurant, so I had time to pick up Lug Nut. I missed him during the week now that I wasn’t working from home anymore. He had adjusted to the new schedule well, but I still wanted to spend time with him.

Adrian appeared at my desk well before the end of the day, letting me know he would be out for the remainder of the afternoon.

“Is everything alright, Sir?”

“Of course,” he replied, somewhat impatiently. “Why would you think otherwise?”

“It’s just unusual for you to leave so early in the day. I wanted to make sure you weren’t ill. Is there anything I may do for you while you are out?” I said, smoothly transitioning.

“If you can just finish up the notes from the Cleckner meeting, that should be it. After, you can go get an early start on the weekend, Brynn.”

He took two steps and paused, then turned to face me once more. “You’ve done good work this week. Thank you.”

Before I could say a word in response, he was gone, leaving me stunned. There was nothing I wanted more than to please that man and he knew it. I didn’t think anything could make me feel better than getting praise at Lotus, but here… good god.

I finished the meeting notes, proofed and edited three times, then emailed them to him. My way of editing was to start at the end and read backwards so my brain would not automatically insert words that might not be there. I caught more errors that way and the majority of the time, my work was perfect when I sent it to Adrian.

It was late when Lug Nut and I made it home. Colin, Andi, and I had hammered out the ideas for the Halloween office party and they would all work within the provided budget. Apparently, I was now part of the office Culture Committee, so for the foreseeable future, I would be recruited to coordinate outings, holiday parties, special days, and any other ideas we could come up with to help the staff feel like they mattered. I liked doing that sort of thing, so it wasn’t a big deal.

After changing into a comfortable pair of lounge pants and a T-shirt, I settled on the couch with a glass of wine and pulled open the volume of Blair’s diary I had been reading. I was learning more about the man at Lotus she had apparently caught feelings for.

Dear Diary,

I have made a huge mistake and I’m not sure what to do about it. The very thing I wasn’t supposed to do has happened. I’ve caught feelings for Him and I don’t know how long, or even if, I can keep it to myself. I’ve never been one to hold in my feelings, and we all know my poker face is non-existent. At some point, I fear something will slip and then it will be all over. I will have breached the agreement with Him. I know I am on borrowed time at this point.

I felt sad for Blair. I knew she had wanted to find love. She had told me numerous times that she wanted to find “the one”. Didn’t most of us want that? It was just so hard to form emotional attachments to people because we both had trust issues thanks to our narcissistic mother.

I read page after page of Blair’s musings. She was beginning to come off as a bit frantic in this particular volume. She was truly worried about being discovered and subsequently kicked out of Lotus. She’d said that a few times before in other diaries, but in this one, she actually mentioned the assignment and being undercover. Undercover? Undercover for what? I associated undercover as police work, but Blair was most definitely not ever a police officer. She had been a paralegal, but that was as close to the law as she’d ever gotten.

She wrote about “making the rounds” with other Doms at Lotus. She didn’t like it, but detailed that it was necessary to get all of the information she could.

Sure, the other Doms can get me off. They all know what they’re doing. I’ve had my share of orgasms along with everyone else’s the last several months. I know several women who would trade places with me in a heartbeat to see what I’ve seen and to experience what I have. But it’s not the same. No man is the same as Him.

“Who? Goddammit, Blair. I need to know who it is so I can get in touch with him, “I said aloud to the room. Lug Nut opened one eye at me, yawned, then flopped over to his other side.

I kept reading, determined to get to the end of the diary to find out if she revealed who “he” was by the last page.

Surprisingly, the next section of pages switched into more of an inventory. She detailed Dominants and submissives, giving names, physical descriptions, and pairings along with dates of the scenes. I found all the information odd, but I did notice that she met with a Kyrios more often than others. I made note of that name and decided to go browse Olympus in the near future. I wouldn’t start asking questions on the server because I didn’t want to draw attention to myself. If my sister was on an assignment for law enforcement and was engaging in BDSM scenes with this Kyrios to get information from him, then drawing attention to myself would be the worst thing I could do.

I then began to notice the details about the submissives. Names, server names, physical descriptions, phone numbers and then for some of them a “date last seen” column. If that meant what I thought it did, then I could very well be holding the reason behind why my sister was dead.

“What the fuck, B?”

I really didn’t know what to make of any of it, but I continued to read, somewhat relieved that when I turned the next page, the subject matter shifted again, lamenting the fact that she was mooning over a Dom who didn’t seem to want a relationship.

I keep thinking that if I scene with Him enough, he won’t want to be with another sub. As it is, he meets with me more than anyone else… as several of the other girls have been quick to tell me before pouting and whining that they had never seen Him focus on one person. A couple of the girls are really encouraging, while a few are turning into jealous bitches.

It almost seemed as though Blair had been obsessed with “Him”, which surprised me again. She hadn’t seemed the type to become so hyper-focused on someone like that.

Given our history growing up, it was difficult for either one of us to express feelings. Invariably, anything we said had been turned around and used against us. We were constantly gaslighted by a woman who actually had no business being a parent. The only benefit to her giving birth to us is that we were sisters and best friends.

Blair was trying to work up the nerve to express her feelings but based on the signals she was getting from the man she was reluctant to do so just yet. She wasn’t sure what his reaction might be. I read more about how much she cared for him and how he made her feel. The way she carried on, she was like a schoolgirl in love, but she’d managed to hide it so well, I never had a clue. It bothered me more than I was willing to admit that she kept all of this to herself.

I wonder if I will ever get up enough nerve to just say how I feel. EREBUS69 made his rules very clear and catching feelings is a big one that I am truly and totally breaking.

I nearly dropped the diary. As it was, my stomach dropped to the floor and my hands began to shake. My sister had been in love with Adrian Benedict.