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SUITCASES laid open on the bed, half full of clothes. Cody packed our things in a hurry; most of the task had been finished before I got out of the shower. My entire body hurt from the previous week of pleasuring customers from all walks of life.

Each night, someone different knocked on our door shortly after Cody fed me two green and white pills and four shots of whiskey. The dose made me sleepy and agreeable. With just the right amount, I almost enjoyed the pain.

“Let’s go.”

“What about the rest of my stuff …”

He pushed past me with a suitcase and pointed to two duffle bags. Most of my summer clothes hung in the closet and my makeup littered the sink in the bathroom. I grabbed a grocery bag and threw whatever I could into it as he screamed for me to hurry .

A taxi picked us up and delivered us to the airport. I knew better than to question where we were going and why. I had to trust Cody; he was my husband and he had already made plans.

Everything happened so fast, I didn’t have a chance to even tell Elaine I was leaving. Not only was she my boss, but she had also become my friend. My only friend. Although my last check wouldn’t amount to much, I had worked for it and was upset that Cody made me leave so quickly.

At the ticket counter, Cody demanded, “Two tickets to Anchorage.”

“We’re going home?” My face lit up at the idea.

I was so happy to finally leave the place that turned Cody into a bad person.

While we waited to board the plane, I asked why we were going back to Alaska.

“Not that I mind, I love the mountains and cooler weather. But how did this decision come about?”

Cody stared out the window and watched the planes move to and from the gates. Once on the runway, they sped and lifted into the air. He smiled when they disappeared into the clouds.

A frown took over his expression. “I couldn’t make enough at work and my boss refused to give me a raise.

He said I needed to intern for a year before I would start making any real money.

Apparently, it was detailed in the offer letter.

Like I would have read that.” His scoff almost made me laugh, then I thought better of it.

Stunned by how he had confessed, I held my breath. He hasn’t spoken this many words to me in months. If I moved, he might stop talking.

“I told them you needed mental help and thought my internship allowed me access to drugs to help my wife. They offered to refer you to a fellow doctor, but I turned them down. When he found out I took the prescription pads, he fired me. We’re broke.”

I placed my hand over my mouth and held in my gasp. His honesty surprised me. “So, it’s my fault we had to move.”

His eyes met mine and he squinted. “Without paying rent, we couldn’t stay in the motel, now, could we? While you were in the shower, the office manager said we had two hours to vacate. If we didn’t, we’d be arrested.” Focused on his shoes, Cody mumbled something I couldn’t hear.

“What?”

A growl escaped his throat, and he yanked the duffel from between my feet. He rummaged through the bag and pulled out a bottle of pills. He popped one and offered one to me. I took it.

“I called my dad and told him I needed help. He said if I could get to Alaska, he’d give me the keys to a house.”

Okay, we can start over. I sighed and sat back. The pill took effect after a few short minutes, and I closed my eyes.

“I’m sorry our time in Dallas wasn’t like I planned.” His shaky voice caught my attention. It was unlike him to be remorseful. “I wasn’t able to provide for you. I promise we’ll have the best life once we get back home.”

I believed him and pushed my luck. “How did we pay for the flights? Did you sell my necklace?”

A smirk transformed his face; he chuckled. “That necklace is fake. I found it at a Halloween store.” He glanced at me and frowned. “You really thought it was real? Awe, that’s so cute.”

When he stopped laughing, he answered my original question.

“With your past, I knew you’d be happy to help.

You didn’t think twice about having sex for money in Seward, so I figured that was the fastest way to make some cash.

” He kissed me on the cheek. “You did good. We’re going home thanks to you.

” He licked his lips and closed his eyes. “You did real good.”

I HAD ONLY EVER been in one airplane before: the one we rode to get to Dallas. My second experience was totally different. In so many ways. On the first flight, we were planning our life. Cody would make good money at his job, and I would be a stay-at-home mom once we decided to start a family .

In my head, the plans had a bright aura as if purity and positivity surrounded us. On the flight back to Alaska, we left behind a few dark months.

Our plans had backfired; Cody never really began his career, and I only angered him with how I wanted our life to come together. As much as I hated the things he made me do for money, he seemed to get pleasure from watching. I hoped that life filled with darkness wouldn’t follow us home.

We landed in Anchorage late at night and hopped on a shuttle to the nearest hotel. Cody told the driver we had arrived for our honeymoon. The thought of newness gave me hope.

I wondered if my mom even knew I had left Alaska and thought about calling her. Cody wouldn’t approve, so I pushed the thought out of my mind. I didn’t want to cause any unnecessary tension.

The name-brand hotel had been too expensive, so he pulled the suitcase behind him and I carried both duffels alongside Spenard Road to the nearest run-down cheap motel. After a quick check-in, we pulled our bags up the steps to our room at the end of the hall.

Exhausted and feeling dirty from our conversation while we waited to board, I immediately opted for a shower. I had spent a long thirteen hours and two layovers thinking about how our life would be different once we got away from the negativity in Dallas .

Cody made a phone call, and I didn’t question who was on the other end of the line.

The next morning, we took our bags to the motel office. “Did someone drop off a key last night for me? Cody Miller?” The attendant nodded and handed Cody a key and an envelope.

I followed my husband to an old truck which had been waiting for us in the parking lot. He loaded our bags in the back. “Ready to see our new home?”

Not questioning his connections, I shrugged. “Yeah. Where we headed?” I prayed now that we were back in the last frontier his demeanor would change.

“Surprise.” An old-Cody smile spread across his lips.

My heart lifted. Thank you, God. He’s back. This is the man I fell in love with so long ago. We can do this. It must have been the stress of moving so far away that made him act crazy. I promise I’ll do everything I can to keep my man happy.

SNOW-COVERED mountains surrounded us on three sides.

Even though it was summer, the temperatures stayed cool.

Cold compared to Texas. The heaviness in my body diminished as we drove alongside Knik Arm.

Mt. Baldy to our right rose above the arm like a protective big brother.

I feel safe again. The thought surprised me. Had I really not felt safe in Dallas?

Cody must have sensed my relief; he grinned and pulled into the trailhead of Thunderbird Falls. “Detour?”

“Yes, please.” Energized, I jumped out of the truck, grabbed my jacket, and followed him to the trail covered with a wood-plank walkway. Birds chirped and leaves rustled all around us, in the trees high above and along the ground.

Water flowed down a slope between tall walls of rock, a mountaintop in the background. If Texas had more views like this, it may have been harder to leave. Cody stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

I leaned back, closed my eyes, and inhaled the scents that surrounded us. Cologne mixed with the piney scent of the forest and the fresh cleanness of the rushing water. I felt a cleanse just from connecting with nature and a renewed connection with my husband. Beautiful .

Relief pushed away any anxiety I had about moving back. It was hard to believe our life in Dallas had actually happened. Confused how the events could have occurred, I decided to put it in my past and forget the days. Easier said than done.

“I’m so glad you stopped and took the time to enjoy our Alaska. This place is so amazing. Incredible. Beautiful. Refreshing. Hard to believe I feel so renewed. Let’s start our life over.”

Cody turned me in his arms and placed a gentle kiss on my lips, then gazed into my eyes. “You have such great ideas.” He pushed a stray strand of hair out of my eyes; love flowed from his touch. “Let’s go home.” A kiss on the tip of my nose sealed the deal.

We crossed the Knik River and slowed. Surprised when he pulled over, again, I smiled.

“I thought because you’ve never been this way, you might enjoy some different scenes. I want to give you the full experience.”

Clouds scattered in the blue sky above the mountain peaks. Both reflected off the water and created a picture-perfect view. I couldn’t believe how much I had missed this.

Tears filled my eyes, and I wiped them away before Cody could see; I didn’t want him to think I was upset in any way. Joy spread through my body, not sadness.

“Thank you, Cody. I didn’t know how much I needed this connection. To Alaska and to you.” I snuggled under his arm and reveled in his embrace.

TWO HOURS LATER , we crossed a set of railroad tracks and pulled into a driveway beside an old single-wide trailer. White walls and what used to be blue trim had molded and faded over the years.

The screen door hung from one hinge and dragged on the small concrete stoop. Someone had built a porch around the steps which sagged in the far corner. Boards covered half of the windows, making the structure appear to be abandoned.