Page 28

Still panicking, I looked down as the shadows from the jagged earth and crystals started to move .

They danced and wiggled until they disconnected themselves from the base of the rocks and crystals, then they all flung themselves at me.

I screamed again, hysterical, unsure of what was happening.

The shadows moved in circles against my skin, like they were exploring a new land that they planned to call home.

They felt like everything and nothing all at the same time.

Wet and dry, quiet and loud. I could hear their whispers reaching my ears, and the tears wouldn’t stop falling from my eyes.

Not until I felt a new type of sensation against my wrists. I snapped my head back up, just to meet Robyn eye to eye, him kneeling right in front of me.

I jerked back, terrified I was going to hurt him, but he held firm. Gentle, but firm.

I never realized the two things could coexist.

“You won’t hurt me,” he said, speaking loud enough to be heard over the wind. His words stung, because I wasn’t sure they were true.

I wasn’t really sure of anything anymore.

“Listen, Aviva. I want you to focus on what emotions you feel coming from me. Try to pull them to you, and release the panic that’s taken root in your chest.”

I looked down at where our skin was touching, the blue flames so close to burning him, and the panic only solidified, my breathing still coming in short bursts.

“My love, look at me.” My eyes snapped back up to meet his. “You’re not going to hurt me. Just focus for me, alright?”

I nodded once, realizing the pain in my muscles wasn’t as profound now that I wasn’t holding back so much energy. I let out a shaky breath, holding it for a moment then releasing it again.

Closing my eyes, I reached out. Not physically, but emotionally.

I searched in my own chest, pushing aside the panic and horror until I found that small handful of calm that I recognized as Robyn’s.

His emotions emitted a green color in my mind, the shade matching his eyes perfectly.

But they also felt like him—warm and strong and kind.

Once I found that piece of him in my own body, I clung to it. I threw myself at it, then tried to yank at it. I wanted this feeling to engulf me, I wanted to get lost in it.

“Tug at it gently, then let it unravel in your chest until it’s all you feel.” I heard him talking, and though I knew he was right in front of me, he sounded further away as I threw what was left of my energy into focusing.

I reached for the green light again, but this time instead of demanding and pulling, I gently brushed against it, willing it to unfurl.

And this time, it did.

It was like an animal being coaxed out of hibernation. It moved slowly, taking its time, but eventually it grew and expanded. As it did, the panic in my body became smaller, less significant, until I was able to take a full breath for the first time in what felt like ages.

“There you go, Avi, you’ve got this,” Robyn said quietly, but he still sounded far off.

I took another breath, making sure to fill every inch of my lungs. I continued to coax the calmness in my chest until that was all I felt.

One by one, my control on the zirilium around me came crashing down. First, the rain stopped, the thunder and lightning and rain and ice and wind all ceasing at once.

Then, without opening my eyes, I could feel as the rocks and crystals sank back down into the earth, buried into the same places they originated from.

I continued focusing on Robyn—his emotions in my chest, his skin on my skin, his presence in front of me.

The weight of the plants slowly slinked off of the lower half of my body, returning to the ground where they sprouted from. The shadows dispersed, and I felt them dissipate like smoke as they became absorbed by the shadows around us, of trees and brush.

The last thing I couldn’t seem to let go of was the vibrant, blue fire coming out of my hands.

I opened my eyes, tears having ceased, and stared at the fire. I realized it wasn’t hurting me, though I could feel the heat radiating off of it.

“Imagine blowing out a candle. Envision the flames getting smaller, then turning to smoke,” Robyn said gently, still staring at my eyes.

I could feel the panic trying to bubble its way back into my chest, and instinctively I looked back up into his eyes, trying to hold onto the calm he was giving me.

He offered a small smile, one full of reassurance.

I took a deep breath, and did exactly as he said. I closed my eyes, envisioning the flames growing smaller and smaller, as if losing their source of oxygen. I imagined the flame on every single finger slowly going out, one by one, the larger flames sitting in my palms going out last.

I opened my eyes as soon as I felt the last flames subside, and watched as the smoke from my flames disappeared into the air around us.

I met Robyn’s eyes and was shocked to find him smiling, dimple and all.

I tried to smile back, but the amount of energy I just exerted was too much on my body. I felt my aching muscles start to shake, and soon I couldn’t hold myself up anymore.

I fell all over again.

Except this time, Robyn caught me, cradling me against his chest. Oddly enough, his heart was pounding just as fast as mine had been just moments ago.

He stood swiftly and started walking in what I assumed was the direction of the cabin. That was when I realized he’d been speaking.

“—but you have to train. You need to be able to control your zirilium, so things like this don’t happen.” He sighed. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me,” he said quietly, and I could feel his disappointment.

I coughed, then nodded. “I’ll train. I promise,” I said, though my mouth suddenly was dry and it came out more like a croak than words.

My vision started to darken, and I murmured a quiet, “I’m sorry,” before I allowed the darkness to take me.