Page 24

B efore I knew it, I was outside, sitting on a tree stump at the edge of a crowd surrounding one of many campfires.

The townspeople had been more than gracious, having prepared the equivalent of a feast in our honor—in Robyn’s honor.

They had just finished telling an elaborate campfire story about one of the ancient Southern kings with some fancy stones that I hadn’t quite understood.

I made a mental note to ask Ezra about it later.

Robyn had introduced me to so many people during and after dinner, I couldn’t keep them all straight at this point in the night. Somehow, though, he always knew. I imagine he’d probably spent more time here than he let on, with how well he seemed to know everybody in Diorum.

It made me question things. I’d now known the two kings of this continent personally, but their ruling styles were on opposite ends of a scale.

My father had never associated with who he would consider peasants unless it was necessary, while Robyn was here, in the middle of all of them and greeting them each by name.

It was so strange. So different. So much better .

The Valwain had split up a while ago, all tending to different things and catching up with townspeople. Chess was not too far off, talking with a group of other trokavs, likely sharing recipes and ingredients, if I were to guess.

Rayven was standing outside the group Robyn was surrounded by, observing. I got the sense he did that a lot—watched Robyn’s back.

Teagan had taken Margo to dance the moment the music had started, which had only been a few minutes ago.

I hadn’t been able to keep track of Ezra or Quinn, despite my Northern-gifted ability to see better than Southerners in the dark.

“Aviva!” Robyn called out over the music as he struggled to depart from the group he was in, telling them he’d be back.

I shifted over on the stump, giving him room to sit by me. Instead, he held out his hand.

Always holding out his hand for me. Patiently.

“Dance with me,” he said, though he seemed eager. It hadn’t been a command, but a request.

He looked down at my feet, which I hadn’t realized I had begun tapping in time with the music.

“I… I only know ballroom dances, traditional Northern stuff. I couldn’t possibly dance in a place like this.” I spoke loud enough so he could hear, but only him, since he had taken a step closer.

“It’s just like flying, I’d imagine. You just let yourself move to the music. Feel it, become it, let it fill you to the brim and overflow. It’s… freeing!” he exclaimed.

When he saw I was about to raise another argument, he spoke again. “I’ll take the lead. It’ll be easy, I promise. Do you trust me?” he asked, his eyes practically glowing, though I knew he’d only had one cup of wine during dinner. His eyes were bright with something else.

Without responding, I slowly stood, taking his hand once again.

Every time our skin touched, the zirilium in my veins sang.

I wonder if he feels it, too.

Before I knew it, he was leading me between countless dancing couples, young and old alike. We weaved between them until we found a spot close to the fire that was a bit more open.

A new song began, and I felt a small wave of panic overcome me.

Before I could completely give in to the panic, I felt Robyn gently cup my cheek and turn my face to look up into his eyes.

“It’s just you and me,” he said reassuringly.

I flashed a quick smile towards him, not breaking eye contact as he removed his hand and placed it on my waist. He guided my hand to his shoulder, then interlaced our spare hands together.

At first, I seemed to block the music out and tried hard to focus on anticipating Robyn’s next move—which I could never get right. He tried to spin me, but I was so stiff I barely budged. I was completely out of my element, and I knew it. I felt awkward, embarrassed, still.

After another failed spin attempt, he leaned down so close to me I felt his lips brush the shell of my ear as he spoke. “Try to relax. Feel the music in your veins like you feel your zirilium.”

I jerked my head back, ready to question just how much he knew about any zirilium I had, but he just gave me a lazy smile as the tune of the song began to shift into the next.

I knew he was aware at least of the plant zirilium due to our encounter over a week ago, but did he know anything beyond that?

Though, I knew this wasn’t the time to question him. For once, I decided I wanted to enjoy myself. Even if it was in the arms of my supposed enemy.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. Instead of focusing on every move I thought Robyn might make, I let myself focus on what moves I actually felt him making.

After a few moments, I felt the music sinking into me. My feet began moving on their own accord, and I was able to feel the small shifts in Robyn’s body language that helped me to anticipate any spins or fancy moves.

Together, we danced around the open field, all around the fire and back again.

He had been right—it was easy to follow his lead.

He spun me often, but not enough to make me feel sick.

I couldn’t help but notice how easily our bodies moved together.

We were like two trees swaying in the breeze, like two birds flying through the sky together.

We worked together in perfect harmony.

Soon, I realized I had gotten the hang of it—I had just needed to relax, like he said. I opened my eyes and beamed up at the male holding me, letting an unrestrained smile cross my lips as I peered into his eyes.

I watched as his breathing hitched when I looked up at him, my expression fully open to him for the first time, my emotions laid bare. I could feel our joy intertwining in my chest, along with something warm.

The songs didn’t stop, and neither did we. I looked around us, and noticed a handful of people were watching us, but suddenly it dawned on me that I didn’t care. For the first time in my life, I didn’t care what those around me thought of me. I just wanted that feeling to last.

That was the only time I had ever felt truly free with both feet on the ground.

The tempo of the song sped up, causing Robyn to challenge us as he began moving us faster, swaying and stepping and spinning. As the world spun around us, I could’ve sworn I saw a flash of ginger and white dancing together on the outskirts of the field.

Soon, we were going so fast I was sure we’d fall over or step on each other’s feet, but we somehow managed not to. I felt exhilarated, alive .

Caught up in the moment, I tilted my head up towards the stars above and let loose a hearty, joyous laugh.

I felt Robyn’s surprise, causing me to meet his eyes once more.

He was beaming .

He was obviously proud of himself, but there was something else there, something deeper I couldn’t place.

I smiled up at him, not holding back in the moment, and was met with a genuine smile of his own. The tempo rose, and soon we were both spinning and moving perfectly in time with one another and laughing .

We laughed together so much my sides hurt, and for the first time in my life, I wondered if this was what pure joy felt like.

Maybe home isn’t a place after all.

***

Hours later, well past midnight, Robyn and I slipped back into our room, both still giggling as if we were schoolchildren.

Once the door was shut behind us, I doubled over and took a deep breath, trying to calm myself. I stood back up after a few breaths to see Robyn leaning against the door, still smiling. This time, I smiled back.

We both went our separate ways to freshen up and change into more comfortable clothes, then met back up in the room. Once it was just us, I gently removed the eyepatch and placed it on the bedside table, but didn’t acknowledge it.

Turning back to Robyn, I tried not to focus on all his exposed, tan, toned skin, as I realized he didn’t sleep with a shirt on.

It wasn’t until that moment that I realized we were both to sleep in here. With one bed. Together .

Seeming to have my same line of thought, Robyn awkwardly offered to sleep on the floor, grabbing a spare pillow and blanket.

I reached out for him and lightly placed my hand on his arm. “You… you don’t have to sleep on the floor.”

I felt my face turning pink as I spoke.

Robyn turned to me, jaw slightly ajar in surprise.

Before he could speak, I said, “Just keep your hands to yourself, husband .”

Closing his mouth, he nodded and swore he would, but I watched as his tan cheeks and ears turned a bright shade of red.

I tucked myself into the side of the bed that was closer to the slanted ceiling, figuring he’d appreciate having more room, despite my wings pressing against the ceiling. I tried not to think about how much harder it would be to escape if I needed to because of this decision.

Soon, we were both settled into the dark, with only a few candles scattered throughout the room.

I peered up above us, out of the window once again. I tried searching for the moon, but couldn’t find it. It had gotten too late into the night to see it from this angle. I tried not to focus on the disappointment I felt bubbling in my heart.

“What are you thinking about? It feels… sad. Hurt,” Robyn said quietly into the dark. Sometimes I forgot that he could feel all of my emotions, just as I felt his.

If only I had known what I was signing up for with those tattoos.

I let out a small sigh, then turned onto my side to look at him, letting my wings breath slightly behind me.

Avoiding the subject he had brought up, I spoke back into the barely illuminated darkness. “I want to trust you, Robyn.”

Shifting onto his side to look at me, he replied, “I want that, too, Avi.”

The nickname made my stomach flutter in a way I knew it shouldn’t.

“Then let’s start right now. From here on out, just open and honest communication between us.” I paused. “Do you think we’re capable of that?”

“We can, I know it. I’d love nothing more than that,” he said, and I could hear in his voice how genuine he was about it, how eager.

For a moment, we were both silent, pondering over what we just promised to each other. Then, I broke it. “Where were you when you disappeared for a week?”

Though the room was dark, the candles lightly cast a glow over his figure and his face. I saw his eyes widen and saw him contemplating.

After a moment, he finally asked, “Honestly?”

“Honestly,” I responded.

He sighed. “I went to Hollis, to Gatlyn Castle and anywhere else in between that I thought would have answers. Rayven and I snuck in, stuck to the shadows. I wanted to get answers for you—for us. About what was happening to you. About what had been in the elixirs. About what… what they had been suppressing in you.”

That was right—a shadow wielder could cause one other person to turn to shadow, too, if they had skin to skin contact.

My breath caught in my throat at his confession. Of all the places I had imagined he had gone, sneaking across the border, into the North, was not even on my list. And he did it… for me . When he had barely even known me.

“And?” I asked softly.

He sighed again, though this time I felt his own disappointment in my chest. “Nothing. Whatever they have going on up there, it’s tightly locked and sealed away. It was a waste, and I’m sorry.”

I nodded, trying not to let the tears in my eyes spill over onto my cheeks. I couldn’t even place why I was crying.

Maybe I was surprised a near stranger had cared that much.

He gently reached up and brushed a stray tear from my cheek that had escaped. I tried not to, but I leaned into his touch, soaking up his warmth.

We stayed like that for a heartbeat, then two, with him gently stroking my cheek. I felt so relaxed in his touch, I could feel sleep creeping up on me.

“Sleep well,” Robyn said softly, so close I could feel his body heat seeping into me. I heard him snap his fingers, and all at once the room was shrouded in darkness.

And for once, after living an entire life surrounded by ice that had made its way into my heart, I could feel the cold in my chest beginning to thaw.