Page 27

O ur group had been at the cabin for a week now, though I’d mostly kept to myself.

I sat in on Ezra’s studies with Margo, interested in learning about the history of the South, including its different rulers.

In this time, I realized Margo reminded me of her brother—she knew exactly how to get you to smile when you weren’t feeling your best.

And I’d definitely not been feeling my best lately.

The energy in my veins grew stronger with each day that passed, demanding to be let out.

My sleep was restless, and being awake had grown painful.

It wasn’t just thrumming through my bloodstream anymore—I could feel it in every inch of my muscles, my nerves, my bones.

It was as if it had its own life force, taken root in my body.

It felt so separate from me, I didn’t know what to do about it.

So I tried to ignore it. Along with the people around me who might ask questions.

I hadn’t let Robyn too close, because I feared he would be able to see the pain in my eyes. I only sat with Margo and Ezra for short periods of time, for as long as I could control my facial expressions well enough to not give anything away.

I don’t exactly know why I wasn’t asking for help.

It was like second nature—to try to handle issues on my own.

I used to have Dimitri and Aurora to depend on, but the Valwain…

I didn’t know them like I knew my own brother and best friend.

Not from a lack of trying on their part—they’d invited me to their nightly group dinners every day for the past week, but I kept turning them down, to Robyn’s disappointment.

I knew we wanted to be open and honest with our communication, but I hardly even knew where to begin.

How did I tell him his bride that he thought was powerless, could actually wield all five northern zirilium?

And that there might be more to her than even she knew, that hadn’t been fully uncovered yet?

That morning when I woke up, something had changed.

I knew when I crumpled to the floor the moment I stepped out of bed that I needed to tell Robyn.

In reality, I shouldn’t have waited that long in the first place.

Once I had collected myself, I peeked into his room to try to talk to him, but he wasn’t there. Now, I had to try to find him.

I let out a sigh as I stepped outside. One of the first things I figured out how to access from the cabin was the roof.

Sometimes I lay out here for hours at night, watching the moon make its way across the sky and the stars dance.

It was peaceful—nobody seemed to come up here.

It was an open space, with what looked like an abandoned training ring.

The Valwain seemed to prefer being around nature, as they always trained down in one of the meadows of the forest. But I liked it up here, where I could see everything around for what felt like miles.

I could even see Echen Bay from up here.

I left my hair lose today, and I was already regretting it.

I could feel its weight on the nape of my neck, and combined with the warm weather, I could tell I was going to overheat fast in the South’s warm climate.

Fortunately, I was wearing a cream, frameless corset top today, so that leveled out some of the heat.

The top was form fitting but not in a way that was suffocating.

It was one of the pieces I had found while rummaging around in my quarters back at The Haven, and I claimed it as my own.

I also found some brown, cotton pants, which I slipped on this morning for the sake of comfort.

Today was all about trying to remain comfortable, despite my aching body.

Since I planned on coming clean, I opted out of wearing the eye patch today.

I figured going for a fly would not only help me locate Robyn, but also help loosen my stiff muscles.

He’d been trying to pull me aside all week to talk, but I kept shutting him out, practically running in the opposite direction.

I imagined he knew something was wrong, but I hadn’t confirmed anything.

If I thought about it too much, I started to feel guilty. I knew I didn’t choose this course for my life, but neither did he. And I hadn’t exactly made it any easier on him.

Maybe I really should be looking to lean on him in these situations. Isn’t that what we agreed upon?

Sighing, I shook my head to clear away the looming thoughts in my head. If I was lucky, flying would help ease my mind along with my muscles.

I flexed my wings, stretching them and bringing them back in a few times in a row. I closed my eyes, focusing on the muscles I felt rippling in my back and shoulders as my wings moved.

I couldn’t imagine not being a child of the sky. I couldn’t fathom what it must be like to forever be grounded, to never taste the freedom the sky had to offer.

In a series of powerful beats, my feet left the roof I had been standing on, my wings carrying me up and away.

For a handful of moments, it was just me and the cloud speckled sky. I weaved in and out of the clouds, my muscles relaxing by just a fraction. I let out a sigh of relief and lowered myself below the clouds, searching for the Valwain.

I spotted them a heartbeat later, almost directly below me in one of their usual training spots. In a meadow full of wildflowers, surrounded by the forest.

Everybody is up and at it earlier than usual today , I thought casually.

That’s when it hit.

The pain was so excruciating I couldn’t even open my mouth to scream. It wracked my entire body in violent waves, one right after the other. I could feel my muscles beginning to lock up, my wings barely able to beat as I started to fall.

My barely flapping wings helped to slow my fall by a fraction, but soon I was spinning out of control, unable to keep myself up right.

And I was heading straight for the Valwain.

The panic in my chest was palpable. Then, time seemed to slow mid-air, and I found myself closing my eyes, giving in.

I couldn’t help but wonder if this was what it felt like to be a shooting star.

I didn’t expect it to be so terrifying.

I was flung back into the present moment by the sound of Robyn’s voice. At first I couldn’t register what he was saying, as he was too far away. But the further I fell, the clearer his voice rang out in my ears.

“ Aviva! ” he yelled out my name, over and over, though I knew there was nothing he could do until I landed.

The other’s voices were becoming louder now too, filled with panic, and I forced my eyes open just in time to see how close I’d gotten to the ground.

In an effort to not hurt anybody else, I used all the energy I could muster up to strain against my locked muscles and forced myself upright, my wings acting as a parachute to soften my descent as I landed with both feet on the ground.

The moment my feet touched the ground below, the earth rippled .

As if I were a stone tossed into a pond, the earth created a circular crater under my feet and stretched outward, shooting up in jagged shards all around me. The moment that happened, I could feel the energy I’d been holding back finally release, bit by bit.

The pain from the fall was nothing compared to the waves of painful power I felt coursing through every inch of my body. The impact from the fall, along with the earth rumbling under me, caused me to drop to my knees on the now uneven ground.

Once my knees hit the ground, the earth rumbled again. In the blink of an eye, various crystals began jutting out of the ground, taking their place right alongside the rows of jagged earth.

I heard thunder erupting overhead, and I barely registered that it had begun to rain. My heart was beating so fast I thought it might explode from my ribcage.

I could no longer tell the difference between the rain on my face and my own tears.

I realized with a start that there was a newfound weight on my legs and thighs, pinning me to the spot.

Straining against my own muscles, I looked down and saw thick, vibrantly green vines wrapping themselves around my body, slowly circling me as though it planned on encasing me and keeping me forever.

I pulled against the plants, trying to stand, but they grew even more rapidly, tightening their hold on my body like a snake wrapping around its prey. The pain increased with every move I made, and suddenly I was outright panicking. My breath was coming in fast and hard, unable to be stabilized.

Soon, my vision went spotty, and my hands started to tingle. The pain was nearly unbearable, and I could still feel the tears making their way down my face. Distantly, I could hear Robyn yelling for everybody to take cover, but they all sounded so far away in the midst of my panic.

My hands tingled until they start to itch, then they started to burn. It wasn’t until bright, blue flames erupted from my fingertips and palms that I realized the tingling was the least of my worries.

I gasped, holding my hands out in front of me and staring at them as the winds began to pick up, moving faster and faster. My hair was whipping in my face, the rain soaking every inch of my skin. Then I heard it, the rain as it landed. Only it wasn’t just rain now, but tiny spheres of ice, too.

It had begun to hail.

Lightning struck a tree in the distance, and I suddenly couldn’t hold it in anymore.

I screamed.

I didn’t realize it at first, but I was screaming a name.

His name.

“ Robyn! ” I cried out.

I looked up from my hands to see him struggling to get to his feet against the insane winds tearing at him. It looked as though the upended earth below us knocked him down, but he was still fighting against all of this.

For me.

My chest was heaving and I felt like I was going to vomit, but the pain from the pent up energy was slowly subsiding.

The issue now was that I didn’t know how to stop.