Page 62 of Vying Girls (Girls of Hazelhurst #2)

Elly

Closing my eyes, spreadeagled on the bed in the shed, I allow myself a second to just breathe.

They’re all inside. Mum on the sofa, an old duvet squished to one side; Nan taking frequent breaks upstairs because she’s about as shattered as me; Dan weirdly detached from his Xbox and playing games with Taylor instead. And Tilda, amongst it all somewhere.

It’s weird how death brings people together.

Is it a guilt thing? An oh-shit-this-is-what-we-should-have-been-doing-this-whole-time thing?

Ironic, because it would have been Grandad in the lounge all the time, always ready for company but mostly ignored, everyone so busy with their own lives.

Just ships passing in the night. Lovable ones, but passing all the same.

The guilt’s kind of eroding. Can’t even really apologise for it.

Never get a moment alone with him, and even if I did, he’s not coherent anymore.

He’s still awake, falling in and out of whatever delirium dehydration and starvation causes.

Mostly just mumbling stuff we can’t make out.

We had him try drawing what he was trying to say but he couldn’t grip the pencil right.

His frustration made us laugh. It meant he was still in there somewhere, still our grumpy, lovely grandad.

Weirdly, it’s only when I get back here that it sort of gets on top of me.

It’s easy enough to stay upbeat at the hospital.

It’s what I’m good for. I can joke with Dan, reminisce with Nan, sort Mum out with whatever she needs.

Taylor’s good at it too, she’s a lot like me only a hyper version.

Tilda’s just about over the shock of seeing her so talkative.

But here, alone, I’m just exhausted. Exhausted and so fucking sad, for me and Grandad both. This isn’t what he wanted for me. He’d be hitting the roof if he knew I’d packed uni in. But hey, we do what we have to and try not to let it crush us in the meantime.

It won’t be much longer, I don’t think. Nan’s still got hope, going on about the nursing home up the road.

He just needs some fluids, get that blasted thing unstuck again.

The rest of us aren’t carrying the same hope.

Certainly not Mum. It’s in her nature to be pessimistic these days, but honestly, it’s just a refreshing dose of reality. Hope can be worse sometimes.

I keep my eyes closed even when I hear the door open. Everyone’s on strict orders not to come in here so I know it can only be one person.

I smile when I feel a body lie on top of mine, wriggling like I’m some sort of mattress. Tilda lets out a contented sigh, mirroring my own as her presence washes over me like a balm.

‘Hey,’ I whisper.

‘Hey, yourself.’ She pokes me in the side. ‘You abandoned me.’

‘Still can’t handle my feral family?’

‘They’re mean when you’re not around.’

Tilda jiggles as I laugh. ‘Give over. They’re plenty mean when I’m around too. That means they like you.’

Tilda grunts good-naturedly. ‘Lucky I’m used to that kind of love language.’

‘Well, that’s the saddest thing ever.’

Tilda smiles, leaning up on her elbow with her hair cascading over me. She strokes a thumb over my forehead. ‘You okay? Objectively speaking.’

‘Objectively speaking, not really.’ Putting my arms around her, I drag her back on top of me. ‘But do you know what?’

‘What?’

‘I know I’d be a million times worse if you weren’t here.’

‘Good,’ she murmurs, gently kissing my lips. ‘That’s exactly why I am here.’

‘You need to get back to uni.’

‘Nah. Haz needs to pull her weight more in the group project. Perfect opportunity.’

I smile weakly, recalling the countless messages from her about how much uni sucks without us.

‘I just don’t want you getting in trouble.’

‘We won’t,’ she says firmly, still hell-bent on not letting me quit. It annoys me, honestly. She doesn’t get it. She’s not had a family depend on her, she’s only ever had the opposite.

‘Why don’t you have tomorrow off with your mum?’ she suggests. ‘We can chill for one day. I think he’s stable enough. Let your Nan and the kids go up instead.’

‘I can’t do that. He’s asking me to stay overnight. He wants me there.’

‘Okay. Just don’t forget to look after yourself too.’

I smile, giving her a squeeze. ‘Oh, my bad. Thought that was why you were here.’

‘Damn, it is. I’m slacking.’ She touches our foreheads together, enveloping us in a little pocket of shadow. ‘Well, your nan’s just got some pizzas out the freezer, so do you wanna kiss for a bit? We’ve got time.’

I can only nod, because what idiot would say no to that?

I let her encourage me onto my side, waiting eagerly for her to mould herself to me, a leg threading between mine, one hand raking through what’s probably bedhead by now.

She does all this without taking her eyes off mine, so many unsaid things running through her expression.

We don’t need words for this. There’s love and there’s support and a promise that she’ll always be there for me.

My eyes slip closed when her lips touch mine. She smells like fruit salad, just the barest hint of her body spray lingering after a long day of hospital sterility. It’s such a girlish scent compared to her dark aesthetic. Suits her though. Beneath all of that, she’s nothing but sweetness.

My body heats slowly, each drag of her lips felt in the pound of my heart, and the wet throb somewhere below. It feels far away though, like thunder in the distance. This isn’t about sex, but reconnection after a shittier than shit day.

She slips her tongue into my mouth, our bodies melded all down their lengths now. I can’t help my small groan, vibrating from my mouth to hers. She does something to me. It’s like magic. I feel every muscle in my body unfurling, smoothing out like a clear lake.

I splay my hand on her lower back, my favourite place to cradle. It makes her feel so small and delicate, like I just want to cuddle and protect her forever. My other arm threads beneath her until there’s no space between us at all.

Her hand leaves my face, skimming down between my boobs and making my hips jerk.

She breaks the kiss, just enough to look into my eyes, and ask, ‘Can I…?’

‘If you’re quick. Pizzas won’t take long.’

Leaning up slightly, she slips a hand into my trousers, stroking me over my boxers a couple of times before dipping inside. The thunder doesn’t feel so distant now. There’s more of a sense of urgency. They might have been instructed not to come in here, but when does Taylor listen to shit?

I part my legs as much as I can in my jeans, my breaths heightening in the small space as she strokes my clit with two sure fingers.

‘Put your leg up here,’ she encourages, hooking it onto her hip.

To be honest, with how close we’re lying, no one’s going to see a thing apart from some heavy making out. I crush our lips together again, loving the sound of her laboured breathing as I’m about to come.

Forcing myself to forget about everything, I concentrate on the pleasure between my legs, and Tilda’s warm body pressed solidly against mine.

The kiss turns disjointed, unable to focus on anything but what she’s doing.

My hand slips onto her chest, fingertips skimming the thrum of the pulse in her neck.

Her skin’s warm. The shed is like a greenhouse today, smelling of warm wood and soil from the couple of gardening bits in here.

‘Are you close?’ she whispers.

‘Super close.’ A gasp escapes when my pussy clenches. My hand moves up, circling her neck completely. I know it’s something she likes, and it turns me on too, to feel her so carefully held in my fingers.

Tilda gathers some more of my wetness before continuing with a speed that’ll easily get me over the edge, her own body beginning to move now.

It hits me all at once, making me gasp out louder than I meant to. Tilda shushes me but doesn’t slow her fingers as I come against them, the leg hooked around her hip pulling her in tighter.

‘Fuck,’ I breathe, rolling onto my back even as aftershocks still quake me. ‘I’m boiling up.’

Tilda smiles indulgently, wiping her fingers on the duvet. ‘You are so beautiful,’ she murmurs, kissing my probably sweaty forehead. ‘I want you to feel good always.’

‘You do that, babe.’ I close my eyes as my breathing chills out. ‘Even after today, I feel good right now.’

‘Good.’ She looks at the door at the sound of Nan shouting my name.

I lift my head, adrenaline flooding me in case it’s something to do with Grandad. ‘Yeah?’

‘Someone at the door for ya!’

I groan as I roll to my feet, not ready to face the real world just yet. ‘Coming with?’

‘Always.’

I hold Tilda’s hand as we cross the tiny garden. The back door’s cracked open and I hope to god Nan left it that way and it wasn’t open before. I think I was quiet enough but facing my whole family barely a minute post-orgasm is not the one.

After a quick look down to make sure my jeans are done up, I enter the much cooler kitchen.

Where Nic sits at the table.

She stands up when she sees us, her expression as unreadable as mine is probably surprised. ‘Hey,’ she says quietly.

‘Hey,’ I echo back. ‘This is random.’

I see her gaze slide to my right, where Tilda stands like a startled bunny.

She looks at me, pressing my hips briefly as she passes. ‘Be right back,’ she murmurs.

Nic watches her go with pursed lips.

‘Thinks you’re mad at her,’ I say.

Nic nods but doesn’t say anything more. ‘How are you?’

‘Um.’ I look around, gesturing helplessly. ‘Well…’

We’re stalled by the sound of Nan placing plates of pizza onto the table. She takes two, one probably for Mum, and with a quick smile, says, ‘I’ll leave you girls to it. The kids can eat in the lounge.’

Nic nods to the table. ‘Sit.’

I do as she says, waiting for her to tell me why she’s here. Didn’t even know she had my address. Nice to see her alive though. I know Tilda’s been stressing after she legged it at hockey.

‘Haz told me you’ve quit uni.’