Page 46 of Trees Take the Long View

We rested our foreheads together for a moment, simply holding onto one another, breathing, existing together.

When we continued on, I asked him what Sahil had wanted to talk about, unless he'd rather not say.

"Oh, nothing like that. He was just warning me my ex is here." The sigh that accompanied that explained the sad, strained way he'd looked when he arrived. Memories, or the feeling of confrontation brewing, perhaps?

"I'm sorry. We can go soon, if you want."

"No, we should be able to avoid him. Anyway, it's not the end of the world if we have to interact."

"Is he a wolf?" I really hoped he wasn't. It would be worse, somehow, if he was a wolf and hadn't been able to accept Dean the way he was. A wolf should never try to change someone he loved. It was a very un-wolf thing to do. Besides which I'd be jealous as fuck, but I tried not to think about that right now.

"No, not a shifter at all. But he sure did want me to settle down." He sighed again. "He works recruitment. I do troubleshooting. Sounds like a match made in heaven, no?"

"No," I said. "Just you and me. That's the one."

He laughed then, a genuine laugh. "Sometimes I can't believe you get jealous about me."

"I'm trying not to. I know you love me best."

"Yes. I do." His voice was so sober now it almost hurt. He meant it so much he couldn't be teasing or slick. "I really do. I hope that's enough."

"It's enough," I promised. "We're just fine, Dean. We're right together—we really are." I leaned against him again, and neither of us said anything then.

I could feel him wrestling with his doubts, trying to fight back the fear that I'd leave him, be disappointed in him, tell him to straighten out and settle down, with the ultimatum that I'd walk if he couldn't.

I would never do that to him, but it would take time to prove.

Luckily, time was what we had.

We stayed close as we walked back, a meandering walk through the woods. I pointed out a few things as we passed: the chipmunk's home, the tree where a wolf shifter in human form had recently spent some time. "I think she might have slept in the branches overnight."

"Like our tiger friend."

"Maybe." I wondered what he'd say to having forest sex someday—in a more private area, of course. This place was definitely too public. We could bring a blanket, put it over some crunchy leaves, and—

"You seem like you know everything about the woods and you've only been here once."

"Well, I like to explore."

"I'll go out with you more, I promise." He kept an arm around me as we walked, a comforting, companionable touch that definitely couldn't lead to forest sex.

"I know. We'll find ways to make it work." I hesitated, then added, "I also want to plant fruit trees. Just so you know. Scatter seeds in wild places, like Johnny Appleseed. Or put seedlings on people's properties with permission. It doesn't have to be...I don't need to own any of it, you know? Even if we never stay anywhere long enough to taste their fruit. Somebody will, and that's all that matters. I want to believe in a future where there are fruit trees."

Dean was silent for so long I didn't think he had anything to say in response. Then he said, very softly, "Me too."

"There's more," I said quietly. "But it can wait."

"More?" He tensed.

"It's something more I need your help with. Eventually."

"Tell me now. I don't like not knowing if you need something."

I sighed inwardly. How to put this in words? I should've waited to say something till I had it all worked out in my head. But I didn't... "Um, well, you know why I stopped working with the police, right?"

"Of course. Your partner, Lightner, engaged in officer brutality."

"Yeah. And I didn't stop him. I mean, I guess I was shocked or whatever—but I didn't step in quick enough. I testified against him later, but that's not quite the same thing, you know? Because he didn't really get in trouble anyway, and he still hurt that guy."