Page 30 of Total Assist (For Puck’s Sake #13)

DASAN

I love that Shively is beginning to feel more secure and comfortable here. When I get out of the shower, I find him sitting on the back deck overlooking the water, completely naked except for the dick collar.

He’s entirely relaxed, watching the waves crash on the beach. It’s been a few days since the meet-up. In that time, I’ve done a lot of thinking about what we learned and observed. We’ve also done a lot of reading together. I think it’s safe to say that my man now shares my omegaverse kink.

However, we leave tomorrow, and I made a promise. It’s time to have a conversation.

Shively looks up as I step outside. His smile will always make my heart flutter. I join him on the lounge chair, taking his sexy naked ass into my lap. If I thought I had it in me to warm my cock, I’d totally have his ass envelope my dick, but there’d be no talking with me inside his body. Pity.

“Ready to talk about what we learned this week?” I ask.

“Omegaverse is hot,” he answers.

I grin. “It is.”

“Yes, Alpha. I’m ready to talk.”

“Good. Is there somewhere you’d like to begin?”

“I don’t think I can handle being a slave or a brat, and I’m definitely not into Little play or… They were telling me about furries, and that’s not my thing either.”

“I’m glad we’re on the same page. To that end, I think I had it right from the beginning. I’m far more of a soft dom than anything else. I enjoy nurture as opposed to strict roles and punishments. I’ve gathered that this is why I’m not good at that part.”

“Oh no, I disagree, Alpha,” Shively says. “Researching and writing an essay is certainly a punishment.”

I laugh. “You learned from it, though, right?”

“Yes, that’s why it was a successful punishment, but it was a punishment all the same.”

“Noted. Essays are now on my very short list of punishments.”

“Along with what?” he asks, looking at me with hesitation.

“Nothing as of yet. I firmly believe that punishments should fit the crime but still be punishments in action, not just words. So, for not trusting me with a decision, I think you researching the subject and writing me a paper worked out well.”

He nods, albeit grudgingly.

“I also believe that one of the strongest reasons I wanted to talk to other doms was because I didn’t understand, uh, my lack of goals or what I’m striving toward.

Through our discussions, I realized that I already had goals that I’m working you toward—self-love of your physical appearance.

Encouraging growth. That’s important to me. ”

Shively huffs.

“One of the things I’ve realized is that full-time isn’t a constant on . I think this is the breakdown in my head that I was struggling with. We’re not in a constant scene, if you will, but that doesn’t mean our dynamic isn’t ingrained within everyday life. It already is in some respects, right?”

“Yes?”

“Tell me how, since you sound unsure.”

Shively is quiet for several minutes as he thinks about it. “I’m naked for you, even when you’re not. Always.”

“Correct. That’s a power exchange tool as well as giving me the pleasure of seeing your body, which I love.”

“Also the chastity device and cock collar, right? The leash?”

“Yes. Also power exchange and control over your sexuality.”

“Oh. I’m not allowed to orgasm without you. I can’t masturbate.”

“Absolutely. What else?”

He chews his lips. “I check in four times a day when we’re not together.”

“Very good, and what’s the purpose of that?”

“My mental health.”

“Good, omega. What else?”

“Honesty. I’m not allowed to lie outright or by omission, and that’s so you’re always aware of how I feel in any given situation.”

“You’re doing very well, sweetheart. Can you think of others?”

It’s a minute before he says, “Calling you alpha shows respect for your position and my role.”

“It is.”

“Oh, my least favorite. The morning and evening rituals have to do with my body, and that’s because of what you just said. Encouraging my growth of self-love.”

“Exactly all that. Very good. You missed the sexual aspect of our relationship, omega. Tell me how you show me you’re submissive.”

He’s slower this time, and I think it’s because he doesn’t see these aspects as submissive but what he enjoys.

“I… want to please you?”

“Above your own pleasure. Yes.”

“I give up all my control.”

“You do.”

“I…” Shively chews his lip then shakes his head.

“You worship my body when I want you to. You take all my orders without hesitation. You’re very open-minded when it comes to what we do, though we haven’t explored a whole lot. You provide pleasure and gratification whenever I want it.”

“I do all that,” Shively agrees, and I smile.

“I think we have a very good foundation of a full-time relationship in this lifestyle.”

“I do too.” Shively looks relieved.

“I think what we really need to talk about is rules. Beginning with generalized rules. You will continue to keep an open mind. You will communicate honestly, respectfully, clearly, and readily. You will make efforts to know yourself so when I ask what you want, you can answer with confidence. You will take part in caring for your physical and mental health; this is something we can work on together once we establish your needs. When you identify a limit in any aspect of our life together, you will tell me immediately and that limit will be respected. You must always be acting of your free will. If there’s a time when you feel it’s taken another turn, you will tell me immediately. Any questions so far?”

Shively shakes his head. “Those seem like common sense to a healthy relationship.”

“The world is filled with unhealthy relationships as models, and we’re going to unlearn that between us.”

“Yes, Alpha.”

“Just so it’s clear, none of the parameters we already have in place are being modified.”

Shively nods. “Yes, I understand.”

“Good. Let’s see.”

“Alpha? Can I ask a question?”

I kiss him because I can’t help myself. Fuck, Shively is adorable. “Yes. Ask.”

“Some of the boys wore collars, and it meant they were owned by their masters.”

He pauses, so I prompt with, “That’s not a question.”

“Right. Do you think I can wear one, one day?”

“You mean besides the one you already wear?”

Shively’s eyebrows knit together, and he touches his neck. “Is it invisible? Are we talking metaphorically?”

I laugh and wrap my hand around the collar he wears on his cock, giving him a slight tug. “This one, sweetheart. You’ve been wearing my collar for a while now.”

“Oh.” His cheeks heat as he looks down at it. “I didn’t… Oh.”

Chuckling, I kiss his neck again. “However, if you want to wear a more visible one, we can do that.”

Shively chews the inside of his lip as he considers this. He touches his neck again, and I can see the struggle. “I do,” he says slowly.

“How about you don’t worry about it right now?

I’ll find a solution to make sure you’re wearing a visible collar that won’t draw attention and questions.

In the meantime, you are wearing my collar.

” I tap a finger on the leather around his dick.

“Right here. Rest assured that you are thoroughly and properly owned.”

His flush is stunning. I love that shy smile when he nods. “Yes, Alpha.”

“Good. Anything else?”

Shively shakes his head. “Not right now. Except… Will you write down these rules so I can refer to them?”

“You said that they were common sense in relationships,” I point out.

“I feel like they should be, but as you pointed out, so many couples around us don’t portray a respectful relationship and maybe there’s something ingrained in me that I’m not aware of.”

I think about what Miles told me about Benji and nod. “I’ll make sure we do that. Which… maybe that’s a key to helping us determine your needs.”

“Writing the rules down?” he asks, confused.

“Writing. I know you don’t enjoy reports, but is it the writing part you dislike? Research?”

“It’s the entire process. That was the most dreaded part of school for me.”

“There’s no structure in what I’m going to put into place. You’re going to keep a journal that I will have full access to. This will be for self-reflection, fears, everything. You are required to tell the absolute truth and keep nothing out. Am I clear?”

Shively is once more chewing on his lip. “Yes.”

“How does this make you feel?”

“Anxious, but… I’m also looking forward to it.”

“Good. I want you to look forward to everything. I’ll find a medium for your journal as soon as we’re home.”

Shively nods. “Okay.”

“How do you feel about this going forward?”

“Excited.”

“I like that.”

“I think maybe… Can we talk about hockey?”

“Of course.”

“I anticipate that I’m going to begin feeling like it’s in the way of this. Already, I hate that we’re leaving tomorrow, so I don’t get to spend all day being yours like this. It’s making me feel stressed.”

I understand that. I’d never thought something would feel bigger than hockey. Even now, it’s so difficult to fathom something being more important than hockey. It reminds me that hockey, no matter how much of my life I’ve dedicated to it, is only a job.

“Let’s think about some ways that we can change your mindset. First, I was just reminding myself that hockey isn’t life. It’s a job. It might take up a lot of our time—more than a full-time job in some instances—but it is still only a job.”

“It is,” Shively agrees.

“Part of what makes me so proud of you is how good you are at your job. I take great pride in seeing you command the team. Leading them and guiding them. Teaching them. You’re incredible.”

“Thank you,” he says quietly.

“I know I’ve said that hockey and everything having to do with it is an alternate life because, like it or not, we have to have separation if we’re going to keep this solely between us.

However, there are aspects of this that cross over, aren’t there?

For instance, you’re still either wearing my collar on your dick or a chastity cage. Right?”

He nods, a smile quirking the corners of his lips.

“Even when you’re here in meetings or what have you, you still check in with me throughout the day, don’t you?”

“Yes.”

“Are there other things you can think of to remind you that you’re still my omega even when we’re in this separate world?”

Shively stares out at the water for a while.

“I don’t know. Maybe a sign or something when we look at each other.

Something that says you’re thinking of me.

Or maybe just acknowledging that I’m yours, even when we’re in the other world.

And I can do the same or maybe a different one so it doesn’t look like we’re mimicking each other. ”

“I like that. How about you touch your neck, as if there’s a collar there. So you’re touching the collar that no one else can see. When you do so, I’ll know that you’re thinking about me.”

He grins. “That’s easy. Definitely. I feel like I’ve been touching my neck a lot since leaving the meet-up.”

“You have been. Now I know why. For me?” I think about it. “Ah. How about when I touch my chest, over my heart. Like this.” I rub my chest as if my heart aches. “Because my heart beats for you, sweetheart.”

“That’s sweet and corny, Alpha.” But he’s beaming at me.

“Then it works.”

“Thank you for this,” Shively says.

“For my heart?”

He smirks. “Well, yes. But for this conversation. I feel more confident and like the ground is sure beneath me now.”

“Good. Does that mean you should have trusted me from the start when I said I was taking you to a meet-up of other doms and their subs?”

He sighs dramatically. “Yes, Alpha. You were right, and I need to trust my alpha.”

I laugh and wrap myself tightly around him. “You do. I’m glad you figured that out, sweetheart.”

Shively huffs, but his body sinks into mine as if he’s made of mist and can become part of my body. Just the way I like it.