Page 13 of Too Sexy for My Hooves (Inn or Out #2)

I carried the tea tray and breakfast up the stairs. The door to her room was open. Gertruda the Barracuda sat in a chair by the window. I set the tray on the small table beside her.

“I added a headache remedy to your tea. The side effect is that you will feel the need to sleep. If you prefer, I can brew you a stimulant to ward off the worst of those effects.”

Gertruda waved her hand. “I’m fine with some extra rest. Will you explain to Peace and Robin?”

I nodded as I poured her tea. “Of course. Perhaps you will feel up to visiting later. Peace eats with me, but I serve Robin in the stable. The prince has me searching for some magic to allow him to be human for a while. Unfortunately, I’ve only been able to grant that luxury to Lord Alfred.”

Gertruda stared at me. “How were you able to transform Lord Alfred? The curse extended to both of them.”

“The inn chose to allow it. My understanding is that these inns are sentient spaces. Its ethereal caretaker informed me that the inn always sees the real guest regardless of the form they arrive in.”

I waited patiently for her panicked blinking to slow. It gave me time to control my urge to grin at her. “Has my visit made your headache worse?”

“No, I’m...” she swallowed. “I’m fine. I find this inn to be a fascinating place.”

I smiled because she was right. “When I’m not seeing it as my prison, I find it fascinating as well. Can I get you anything else, Gertruda? I’m going to try to brew a curse-breaking tea for Robin this afternoon.”

Gertruda shook her head. I made it to the door before she spoke again. “Try brewing the tea with finely ground chestnuts, a dram of horsetail powder, and two strands of his mane. Tea isn’t meant for four-footed creatures. Consumption may allow the inn’s magic to prompt a change.”

And if Robin’s changes distracted us, we might forget to worry about her true identity. I wanted to haughtily inform her that there was no chance of that happening, but I held back.

“Thank you,” I said instead, adding a slight bow. “I will try that.”

* * *

Peace sniffed the tea that I was steeping and wrinkled her nose in disgust. “The tea smells horsey. Do you think it will work to convert him back?”

Considering that the fairy queen’s spy had suggested the formula and that she was very eager not to be caught lying to the inn, I felt reasonably confident. I doubted it was a cure, but I hoped it would allow me to use the inn’s magic to transform him.

Alfred’s change back to human lasted for a few hours. Wouldn’t it be great if Robin could do that too? And maybe I could keep Gertruda feeling bad enough to skip having dinner with the two of them. I was mentally rubbing my hands in glee as I thought about how to make her sicker.

Carol always joked that I had a dark side, but it had never been clearer to me.

“Robyn claims the curse doesn't bother him, because he finds solace in my presence. Fighting off strange women was the hardest part for him.”

“Is Prince Robin handsome in his human form?”

Peace pondered my question while I transferred the tea to a portable cup I could take to the prince.

It took the fairy princess a while to think it through, but then she smiled.

“No, in human form Robin is handsome in a different way. Some men, as you know, are inherently beautiful—like all those in your bear’s family.

As a centaur, Robin is a gorgeous hunk of maleness. All I want to do is ride him.”

I snickered because my sense of humor was worse than a twelve-year-old boy’s. “Do you want to ride him in the literal sense, or are you implying a sexual interest in the man part of him?”

“Both, because he is very careful not to jostle me too much in his centaur form. But my carnal urges are only for the human Robin. The human version is the one I like best.”

The magical alarm I’d set chimed through the kitchen. I smiled. “The tea should be potent enough now. Let’s go find out if it works. Farley’s brother is cooking dinner tonight. He’ll be delivering it here in the next hour.”

“A handsome bear that cooks would be quite the catch. Does Farley cook?”

“I don’t know,” I said with a laugh. “He has a lot of other talents. I’m good with the skills he’s shown me.”

“Farley makes you giggle,” Peace said with a grin.

“Look who’s talking. Prince Robin makes you giggle.”

“Does he?” Peace asked.

She seemed so surprised that I snorted a bit.

“Every time you go for a walk, you ride him into the forest, giggling at everything he says. His smile is so broad that I’m sure his face hurts for the rest of the day.

I don’t know who came between you two, but I’m ready to kick their ass.

A sexy man who makes you laugh is a keeper in my book. ”

Peace smiled at my comments, but she didn’t reply. However, she fairly skipped beside me as we walked out of the house.

* * *

Robin kept his eyes on Peace while he drank the tea I made for him. The face he made spoke volumes about the nastiness of it, but magical cures were never tasty.

“Why don’t you and Robin do a lap or two until the cure gets digested?”

Robin made another face and handed his now-empty cup to a giggling Peace. I watched as they started their lap around the yard. There was no sign of Lord Alfred. Robin reported that he was resting with a headache after a mostly sleepless night. I would have to check in on him later.

In the meantime, I slipped the wand from my pocket. Hey, Jezel. Can you hear my thoughts?

Louder than I want to, she replied.

I ducked my head to hide my smile. How long should I wait before trying to transform him?

Given that he’s a fairy, his body likely absorbed your magic the moment his lips touched the cup. Their bodies instantly consume power when it’s available, which is why they require so little food.

My eyebrow lifted. “Fascinating,” I said aloud, forgetting to merely think the thoughts. I clamped my lips together. Thanks.

You’re welcome. Be gracious if it fails. The fairy spy could have misled you.

My instincts don’t think so, but logically, you could be right.

There is only one way to know for sure.

I nodded reflexively and lifted my head.

The prince and Peace were on the other side of the yard, walking through the lavender beds that Farley had coaxed back to life.

I whistled and waved. Robin reached out a hand to Peace to swing her up onto his back.

Her joyful laughter rang out as Robin jumped over the flower beds and galloped back toward me.

It was a beautiful moment that I hated to interrupt with an experiment that might not even work.

“It’s time to try,” I told them.

Peace slid off the prince’s back and skipped to my side.

Most of the fairies I’d encountered in life were sultry, like a glass of fine wine.

Peace was bubbly like champagne, her effervescence bursting forth in giggles, flirtation, and constant, cheerful chatter.

If I had lived as long as she had, I’d be a crotchety complainer.

Jezel had lived that long—in some form or another—and her nature was as salty as any sailor’s.

Prince Robin took a couple of steps toward me.

I smiled to reassure him. “Bow your head, your highness.”

I chanted under my breath and touched the wand to his forehead. Magic surged from the wand into him. Robin drew in a breath and shrank back to his normal size, except for his clothes, which were completely missing. He looked down at himself and laughed.

I covered my mouth so I wouldn’t do the same.

Beside me, Peace gasped and ran to throw herself into his arms to shield him from my view. He caught her and laughed about that too. I had expected him to be embarrassed and her to be the one laughing. They must have expected the same because they stared at each other in genuine surprise.

I let them do that for a bit, grinning the whole time.

Eventually, I decided that allowing a guest to run around naked might be a bad precedent.

I discreetly looked off and pointed my wand at the prince.

When I dared looked back, the prince looked like he’d stepped out of a Disney movie.

I could see what Peace meant about his handsomeness.

He was more rugged in his human form. The clothes did nothing to disrupt his manliness.

Peace gasped again and stepped back to admire him. “You are yourself again.”

“I am,” he said.

And then he kissed her. I sighed as he swept her close and held on. Their kiss spun out while Peace kissed him back.

I turned away to head to the kitchen. Lunch was waiting to be served. Thanks, Jezel .

I could swear I heard a ghostly sigh. They were meant, weren’t they? That kind of kiss is the kind every woman dreams of.

I nodded and shoved the wand into my back pocket. Farley kissed me like that the first day I met him. Didn’t your seaman kiss you that way?

No, my lover’s kisses made me want to spend my nights with him, but I never cared where he was during the day. Do you miss your bear when he’s not here?

Out the kitchen window, Robin and Peace held hands as they went to sit at the table I’d prepared under a beautiful oak.

I thought about Jezel’s question as I loaded their picnic lunch on a tray.

I had made a separate tray loaded with delicious soup, fresh bread, and another variety of iron pot brewed tea for Gertruda the Barracuda.

She might continue to feel bad, but I would never starve her.

The tray for Lord Alfred consisted of carrots, lettuce, and a few strawberries.

I paused my preparations to stare at the couple in my backyard who only had eyes for each other. Did I miss Farley being here? The short answer was yes, but I also wouldn’t want him hovering.

“I’m trying to think of how to explain,” I said aloud.

“I long for his company in a way I haven’t longed for any of the others.

Most of the men in my life passed through my bed like your seaman passed through yours.

They didn’t stay in my life, but I also never expected them to.

Ethan was outside my normal. He used our relationship to displease his mother.

His infidelity made me angry, but it didn’t break my heart.

I don’t think I love the way other women do. ”

You’re not as blasé about love as you describe, so I will not go there. In many ways, I admire your modern views of men. You do not need one to survive. I didn’t either, but I was lonely at times. It is not my wish for you to tolerate such a life. I would wish that for no one.

“Good thing, because I am not one for tolerating much of anything I don’t think is fair,” I said with a chuckle. “But you don’t have to worry about the friction between us, Jezel. I’m only here for another forty-six days or so. We’ll work together fine until then.”

The inn and I want you to stay, Selene. The inn chose you above all other witches of your time. I trust the magic of this place. I will not stop trying to get you to stay.

“Noted,” I said. “Give me the clothes, Jezel. I have to serve lunch to the fairy spy.”

A ripple ran across my body. A form-fitting, single-layer, black dress covered me completely. The fabric was light to the touch, but it lay on me like armor. I felt safe in it. The dress fell to mid-calf and came with matching black boots with a sturdy sole. I lifted each foot.

Is this a better outfit?

“It’s too conservative for my tastes, but way better than the corset skirts.”

Good. We will find something that suits. The hat must stay.

“Understood,” I said with a laugh.

And this time, I knew she meant it.