Page 73 of This Blood that Bonds Us

“Do I need to leave?” Dom asked.

“No, you can stay,” Kimberly said.

“Yeah . . . sure. Stay. Um, I’m just gonna say it. Ever since we beat Akira, the thirst got worse.”

Kilian’s brow bent. “You need to feed more?”

“I thought that at first. But human blood made it worse. I fed more and it just made me feel like I was losing my mind. Until I . . . didn’t have another choice but to try another option, and I drank Kimberly’s blood.”

Dom’s and Kilian’s eyes grew wider. I didn’t think I’d ever seen that much emotion on Dom’s face.

“Is this . . . normal?”

Kilian shook his head and stood straighter. “No. I’ve never heard of such a thing happening. And Kimberly’s blood keeps you satiated?”

“Yeah, for the same amount of time human blood did.”

Kilian rubbed at his forehead in a way that showed all his wrinkles.

“Should I be worried?” I’d never seen Kilian speechless.

“I do not know. I think it’s good you’ve found a suitable solution.”

It was physically painful to tell Kilian something so personal.

“Maybe there’s a reason . . . Do you remember any texts or anything talking about this?” Kimberly asked.

“No. We’d have to look for any specifics. But it is bringing up a thought.” He rummaged on this desk some, moving stacks of books and papers.

When he didn’t find it, he went for the shelves and ran his finger over creased, cracking spines till he pulled out a little black book. It was leatherbound with worn pages strapped together. The engraving on the front was barely visible. It appeared to be a crest with two swords on either side, a harp and an owl in the middle, with four Latin words on the bottom.

“This is the coven’s crest. Not all of them have one. But Cecily was born in a time period where having family crests was common.”

“What do the words on the bottom mean?”

“That’s what interested me the most about this. At first, I believed them to be just words that The Family valued, but now I believe the four words represent a trait of each of The Guard: strength, loyalty, desire, and protector.”

“What do this have to do with my blood problem?” I said, shifting under the weight of Kilian’s gaze.

“We’ve spoken about your brothers’ issues with Her blood before. It affects you all differently. I’ve had a lot of time to contemplate why that might be. I met The Guard when we attacked long ago and they fit these roles. We surrounded the monastery with fire. I suspect Ezra must have taken the queen to safety immediately. They were accompanied by Sirius. Only Eros and Akira stayed behind to fight. My brother wanted to stay. He wasn’t going to let Eros out alive, and vice versa. The entire place went up in flames and took their mangled bodies with it. Eros . . . he was stronger than all of them . . . I wonder . . .”

“And your brother . . . What happened?”

“He was able to find a chip in that armor. We found their hideout and ambushed them. Much like now but less prepared. They didn’t have near the numbers, and we didn’t have the dagger. He locked me out of the monastery before I could go after him. By the time I escaped, they were all gone and the building was ash. Ezra stayed closest to Her—the lover, symbolizing Her desire and lust for connection. They took Sirius with them, and at first, I believed his trait to be loyalty, but after talking with the twins, it makes more sense for him to be strength. Akira was undoubtedly loyal. And that leaves Eros . . . the protector.”

“These traits would be brought out in me and my brothers, then? Since they think we’re the new Guard.”

“Yes. You’d likely be a better judge of that. If you find your role, it might help better understand what’s going on with the blood.”

“Luke is the lover,” Kimberly said, quickly writing all four words down on a piece of paper.

“Agreed.” Luke talked about the queen like he was in love with Her, so likely, that was his trait.

“Zach could be strength or loyalty or protector,” I said, staring at the remaining words. “But there’s no way I embody strength.”

“There are different types of strength,” Kimberly said.

Kilian interjected. “This particular word also could pertain to courage or bravery.”