Page 123 of Things I Overshared

“Yassssss!” a chorus rings out from my other three sisters.

“You all are like toddlers. Honestly. Can we just focus on Samantha, please?” Susan blushes a tiny bit. It’s funny to see the COO, Mom Jr., who is always put together to a tee, even the least bit flustered.

“So, the last I’d talked to you, it was twenty-four-seven heaven. Was it the tabloids?” Sadie gets us refocused.

“That didn’t help. But he’s got to be used to the stupid tabloids. I mean, he’s a billionaire, which, hello, how did I not know about his family?”

“I didn’t either,” Skye says.

“He didn’t like to talk about it,” Susan murmurs.

“We went to see his family for the second time, and I think it was just a classic case of things getting too real. His niece asked us if we would get married.” My sisters wince in unison. “Then we went out with his brothers and sister-in-law, and they were saying I was a winner, good with the niece, that his mom was eyeing us. Basically like ‘hold on to her, bro’ kind of stuff. I think he just got spooked.”

“I just would not have pegged him as someone who spooks easily. He’s so serious about everything, always.” Sadie stares at the wall, as if she’s picturing him.

“That’s what I was thinking too.” Susan nods. “But he’s definitely not a player, is he? I mean, I can’t fathom he’d be capable of stringing you along for fun during your trip. For the same reason, he’s too serious. He doesn’t seem like the type for a fling.”

“Well, Susan, I agree, but yet, here I am.” I gesture with my arms, sounding more bitter than I mean to. “I’m sorry. I know he’s your friend, but I mean, I was with him nonstop for almost six weeks, and even I found it hard to know him intimately. And like, Iknew himintimately!”

“Yeah, I’d like to circle back tothat,” Sadie says.

“No, we’re not talking about the hot sex when we’re in breakup mode. We’re mad at him, remember? Get your head in the game, Sade.” Skye gives her a glare. I fiddle with the edge of the comforter.

“Wait,wasthere hot sex?” Sally asks slowly. Everyone quietly stares, waiting. I shake my head.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, you’re telling me that you were shacked up in that Paris penthouse suite with just one bed, and he kept his hands to himself!?” Susan gets loud with shock.

“No, we did fool around. And it was . . . amazing.” I tear up again.

“And you didn’t have sex because . . . ?” Sadie seems truly befuddled by this. I can’t blame her.

“Because at first I said I wanted to wait.”

“Atta girl. You stuck to your own boundaries. And then wow, okay, he respected that. Trying really hard to stay mad at him here.” Skye grows confused, and my sisters’ faces start to match hers.

“Well, joke’s on me. I didn’t want to keep waiting, but he just kept sayingnot yet, like we weren’t ready. And then I guess maybe he never was? Or he didn’t want me to get too attached? As if daily morning orgasms wasn’t doing that already? I really,reallydon’t know.”

There’s a beat when I know all of them are absorbing the morning orgasm overshare.

“So. He says you’re too much for him, which by the way just means he’snot enoughfor you, baby girl. And don’t you forget that—and then you came back to New York and what? You didn’t call us.” Sadie recounts it all for our sisters.

“I wanted him to have to face me, to look me in the eye. Which he did, at the office.” I start to shake. “And he said, ‘Miss Canton,’ like you would say ‘Bubonic Plague,’ and then he turned and walked away. He was totally unaffected, as if we’d never even happened.” Tears start to overrun my cheeks again.

“Ooookay, I think we should transition to theThere is plenty of dick in the seaportion of our sistervention here.” Sally straightens up on the bed, and Susan chokes when our little sister saysdick, making all of us giggle.

“Good point. You don’tneedEmerson, or any man,” Skye preaches. “But when you are ready and you decide you want to settle down, the right guy is out there for you.”

“Totally. And he won’t run off scared,” Sadie says.

“He’ll be way better than Icy Emerson,” Sally adds, with passion. But I choke a bit. Because I know the truth. When he was open and honest, when he wasn’t pushing me away . . . I don’t think there is anyone better than him. Not for me. He was a once-in-a-lifetime type of love.

“Waterworks still? We’re failing, y’all. C’mon! First and foremost, you need a shower, desperately.” Susan starts to tug on the blankets, her eyes wide.

“Yep, then it’s either Will Ferrell movies, second-to-last season ofNew Girl, or Kevin Hart stand-up—weeper’s choice,” Skye says. They all argue about movie choices on their way out of the room, and surprisingly, I can’t stop a small smile. My eyes are still burning and my chest aches, but I’m smiling. I needed this.

There’s just nothing like sisters.

Chapter 38