Page 22 of The Wayward Lady (The Wayward Widows of Willoughby Hall #1)
A fter Lavender left, Kendrick was at a loss for what to do with himself until the evening. He tried to focus on work, but his thoughts kept drifting back to Lavender and the progress she’d obviously made with Miranda today. He desperately wanted to ask Miranda what they’d talked about, but she’d gone straight to her room after dinner, eager to dive into her new books, and he hadn’t wanted to do anything to upset her. Not after he had actually caught her smiling several times after she had returned.
After he had gotten the younger children to bed and the appointed hour finally arrived, Kendrick made his way to the gazebo where he had arranged to meet Lavender. The moon cast a silvery glow over the garden, and he glanced toward Willoughby Hall and the towering oak that technically belonged to the widows. A smile curved his lips as he remembered the way that Lavender had quite literally fallen at his feet. If she had not, his life would probably still be very small and lonely.
He definitely wouldn’t have Miranda back.
When he arrived, he found Lavender already there, her silhouette outlined by the soft moonlight. She turned at the sound of his footsteps, and the relief in her eyes mirrored his own.
“Lavender,” Kendrick greeted her softly, his heart thundering. “Thank you for coming.”
She smiled, her heart in her eyes. “Of course, Kendrick. I have wanted to talk to you ever since you returned to the hotel in Barcelona with all three children.”
He sighed and raked a hand through his hair as he sat on the bench beside her, remembering what a crushing blow that had seemed at the time. “I didn’t know what to do. Miranda would not have gone without them.”
“Of course not,” she soothed him, leaning her head against his shoulder. “You did the right thing. But I know it could not have been easy for you, given that they are products of Isabella's affairs after she left you.”
Lavender’s easy acceptance filled him with surprise and gratitude. Her words stirred a deep ache within him, a reminder of the wounds that still lingered from Isabella’s betrayal.
“I never imagined I would have to face the consequences of Isabella’s actions in this way,” he muttered, his voice heavy with emotion. “But I can’t let those children suffer for their mother's mistakes. They deserve better. And I’m already starting to love them.”
“You’re doing the best you can, Kendrick,” Lavender reassured him, her voice gentle but firm. “And the children see that. Miranda may still be cautious, but she’s slowly realizing she can depend on you. And Rafael and Teresa obviously adore you.”
“They adore you, too,” he said. “They’ve been asking about you constantly. But Miranda is so hurt, so suspicious, and jealous...”
“She told me a bit about why that is this afternoon,” she told him. “I think she’ll eventually realize I’m not trying to take you away from her. In fact, she agreed to let me come to dinner once a week until she feels like she can trust me.”
“Really?” he asked, shocked that she had managed to bargain with Miranda so that they could have some time together. “She agreed to that?”
Lavender nodded, lifting her head from his shoulder so she could gaze into his eyes. “I promised that she could depend on me too, that I didn’t want to take you away from her but become part of the family the four of you are building.”
He swallowed dryly, her words striking him speechless. He didn’t know what he’d done to deserve her, and he couldn’t believe she actually wanted to join him on this mad path he’d sent himself down.
“Is that what you want?” she asked softly. “These last few weeks, I haven’t been so sure.”
Guilt welled within him. He should have told her what he was feeling. He should have let her make her own choices instead of deciding he was doing her a favor by walking away.
Lavender’s expression shifted subtly when he remained silent, a flicker of vulnerability crossing her features before she masked it with a neutral expression. The moonlight bathed her in a soft glow, highlighting the delicate curve of her jawline and the shimmering uncertainty in her eyes.
“Lavender, I...” Kendrick began, his voice trailing off as he struggled to find the right words to convey the tumult of emotions swirling within him. His heart thrummed with the weight of his love for her, still trying to find the words to tell her how much her efforts on Miranda’s behalf, on his as well, had humbled him.
He cleared his throat and tried again. “I’ve been so afraid,” Kendrick admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “Afraid of letting myself hope for something more, for fear of losing it all over again.”
A soft sigh escaped Lavender’s lips as she reached out and took Kendrick’s hand, her touch warm and reassuring. “I understand, Kendrick,” she said softly. “Miranda said nearly the same exact thing. But sometimes, we have to take a leap of faith, even when it’s frightening. I’m here for you, for the children, for whatever may come. I will never give up on any of you. But you have to believe in me, too.”
“I do believe in you,” Kendrick said hoarsely, his voice raw with emotion. “I want to try despite all the doubts and fears that haunt me. But until you spoke with Miranda today, I thought there was no way I could have you and her both. It was killing me. I didn’t know how to fix it.”
A soft smile tugged at Lavender’s lips as she squeezed his hand gently. “Then I’m happy to be able to set your mind at ease a bit. She said she wants you, Rafael, and Teresa to know what it is like to be loved. And I am determined to prove to her that she can be loved too.”
“Did you mean what you said earlier? Do you truly love me?” he asked softly, hating how vulnerable he sounded. And immediately, he knew he had done it all wrong. He should have told her that he loved her first. But saying those words without knowing for sure how she felt terrified him.
Lavender met Kendrick’s gaze, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears that reflected the moonlight like liquid silver. Her hand tightened around his, her touch grounding him.
“I do, Kendrick,” she confessed, her voice barely above a whisper. “I think I have loved you almost since the day we met. When I am with you, I feel at peace. Both with you and with myself. Your kindness, your strength, and the love you have for your children... It is all a part of why I fell for you.”
Kendrick felt a weight lift off his shoulders at her words, a sense of relief flooding him as he gazed at Lavender with newfound clarity. The walls he had built around his heart were no match for her love and kindness.
“I love you too, Lavender,” Kendrick admitted, stunned by how easy the words had been to say. “More than I ever thought possible. You’ve awakened parts of me that I thought were lost forever, and I want nothing more than to build a future with you by my side, facing whatever challenges life throws at us.”
Tears welled up in Lavender’s eyes, spilling over as she launched herself into Kendrick’s arms. She buried her face against his chest, and he lowered his face to her hair, simply breathing in the scent of lavender that always clung to her.
She smelled like home.
“Oh, Kendrick,” Lavender whispered, her voice muffled against his shirt. “I have dreamed of this moment, of being able to hold you like this and hear you say those words. I want nothing more than to be with you, to support you, and love you and our children with all that I am.”
Our children.
With those words, he finally realized that he was no longer alone. She had convinced him that she would eventually win his daughter over and that the five of them would become a family.
As they sat there, wrapped in each other’s embrace under the soft glow of the moon, the waves crashing on the beach below, Kendrick felt a sense of peace settle over him, a profound certainty that with Lavender by his side, nothing was impossible.