Page 15 of The Runaway

“I think that’s exactly what she wants people to think, Joci. That she’s a whiny, immature girl with no head on her shoulders. I’d bet money that the reason she came to see me that time wasn’t to flirt with me, as you thought. I think she was planting the seed, knowing we were going to see more of each other. First impressions are important, after all. Aleksander was in on his father’s attempted assassination and orchestrated everything that followed. He has every expectation of sending Kiri to America, and I believe Oppie and I are going to see far more of this country than either of us would like.” My eyes narrowed on Sascha as he scowled, tugging on his beard thoughtfully. “I think Kiri is far more cunning than anyone gives her credit for. What do you think of it all, Joci?”

“In 22 days, it won’t be my problem. Aleksander offered me an out, and I took it.” Sascha sat up in surprise, his eyes firmly on me, and I inhaled a deep, slow breath. “I have no purpose, and if I stay in Russia, Anatoly will get me eventually. It’s a lot harder to get here without Aleksander knowing. Since he couldn’t find a use for me, he decided it was easier to dump me here and forget about me.”

“That’s wonderful, Joci. Ophelia mentioned something about you going off on your own all the time, and that you had an American ID and stuff, but you’re really staying because you want to.” My lips twisted ugly as I nodded an awkward jerk of my chin, and Sascha smiled warmly at me. If there was one thing Sascha was good at, it was being understanding and supportive. He was exactly the kind of man that every womandreamedof. “Are you going to work on your English with a tutor, or…?”

“Aleksander is providing me one for free. He wants to get rid of me really bad. I’m guessing it’s because he has no plan for me, so he doesn’t want me to screw him up. He’s agreed to fund me for a year, too, and he even told me he hopes I do well. I’m not sure if he meant it, but I like to think he did.” I hadn’t realized I had switched back to Russian until Sascha grumbled lowly in acknowledgment, and I cleared my throat roughly. He’d spoken entirely in English, but I… I just couldn’t keep it going. “Once you leave, it’ll be over. Finally.”

“Have you just been wandering around the city by yourself all the time?” The hairs on the back of my neck stood up at that, and I nodded again. I didn’t want anyone knowing about Jacob; all I had to do was wait out the next 22 days until Aleksander, Ophelia and Sascha went back to Russia. Then, I could breathe. There was no reason to ruin it by dragging Jacob into this mess.

“Pretty much. I have to find a place to stay before you go back. I’m also considering some other stuff.” Suddenly, I wished I’d talked to Jacob about why my body constantly hurt— why I couldn’t raise my arms above my head. Why my knees hurt from just a few seconds of pressure.

I had been snapped open and had to be wired back together— like a doll that’d been played with too roughly. Closing my eyes, I flopped back again as Sascha’s gaze left me, but the weight of our conversation clung to my skin thickly.

My lids fluttered at the loud bang that resonated through the room and down my arms from the ceiling. How long had I been here? The question circled against my forehead wildly, bashing against my skull on its unsteady track around and around. Licking my cracked lips, I blinked hard in an effort to see, but dried sweat crusted my eyes and made everything bleary.

“I mean— I get it, Joci. You got with me because you saw something you liked, even if you didn’t continue liking it. Don’t you think it’s a huge ‘fuck you’ to me that you don’t have the decency to say to my face that you don’t want to be together? I’m not mad that you broke up with me, just how you went about it.” Whimpering pathetically as Anatoly’s voice wrapped around me, my skin crawled in disgust and fear. Goosebumps blanketed my body, and I sucked in a sharp breath when he tangled a hand in my hair. His gaze flamed withrage,locking on mine as his other hand hooked under my leg to force it up at an angle it wasn’t supposed to bend. My shrill, weak cry was all my dried throat could expel, and my heart started to race as his hot breath rolled down my front. “If you wanted it so bad, you should’ve just said so. You’re only good to spread your legs— I can’t even call you completely useless.”

“I’d rather be unusable and happy than have a purpose in chains.” My wrists ached fiercely, and I shook my head hastily of the images that burned against my eyelids. Glancing over at Sascha, relief tore through me that he hadn’t heard me. For years, I’d followed Lyov around, making sure he didn’t stumble drunk into a gutter. For half a decade, I had learned to punch someone despite knowing I really couldn’t if I had to. Turning my gaze down, I flexed my hands, and I could feel the metal in them just under my skin.

“What are you guys doing after this?” Sascha looked up from his phone briefly, stretching his legs and inhaling deeply.

“We were going out to lunch. Why?” My lips thinned, my mind whirring at all the stuff I had to still make happen. I needed an American phone. I needed to start looking for a place. I had to time it all perfectly, so it didn’t overlap with Aleksander’s stay in this country. He wasn’t going to give me a dime—dime?— until he was on the plane and heading back to Russia.

We hadn’t talked about how, yet. Even so, I needed a bank account.Maybe, I can ask Jacob to help me.

“I was just wondering.” Curling my fingers in my lap, I scrunched up my nose in distaste. Aleksander was paying for everything, so everyone wanted fancy American food. I’d had so much fancy food in the past five years courtesy of Lyov’s pretentious ass that the sight of a table cloth made me want to puke.

If I was going to live here, I wantedgoodfood. I wanted street food, or food like the pizza place Jacob and I were at. Just nice, proper, everyday food.

Why am I taking this so personally?I knew the answer to that question as I sat up to smooth my skirt over my thighs.I want something different, and fancy food is not different.

“Joci—” Humming softly, I wiggled my toes in my heels to frown at the slight, gritty sensation of my stockings. When was the last time I bared my legs? “We’re open to suggestions, you know. You don’t have to just follow us around.”

“I don’t have anything in mind.” The English words rolled thickly off my tongue, and Sascha nodded out of the corner of my eye. Truthfully, nothing stuck to my mind for too long— I had so much to think of. Those thoughts kept me up all night, racing and evolving. My tutoring sessions were going to start on Wednesday, Aleksander had said, and I desperately needed help.

Jacob understood me, but apparently no one else could. My lips quirked at that notion, and I reached down to rub my ankle as the silence rang in my ears. I didn’t want to put too much faith in it, but every time I thought of him, I smiled. That had to count for something.Right?

When this meeting was over, I was going to wander the city some more, and hopefully we’d run into each other. Otherwise, I wore a skirt for nothing.

16

Joci

Panting heavily, I glanced through wide eyes over my shoulder as my heart made a bid to jump out of my chest. Sweat poured down my back and stuck my hair to my face, and the cold made those droplets icy within seconds. Thick, white clouds rose up in the air from my hard breaths, and my legs trembled as I leaned against the side of the building to sniffle harshly.

“Shit.” Flames engulfed my throat, and I gulped harshly as frigidness seeped through my coat and into my back. Hoovering up air, I tried to catch my breath and stop the blood drumming in my ears. “Reece needs to calm down.”

The guy followed whatever was happeningto the letter, as if straying from a hastily made itinerary was a sin. Even the mention of changing plans or any spontaneity at all sent him into panic mode, and it was as silly to watch as annoying. Reece wanted to do his job, and I understood that, but…

Jesus Christ. There wasnoreason to rush. It wasn’t even 1pm, and he was trying to get us to a restaurant half an hour earlier than the reservation.

Swiping my hair back, I straightened off the wall to wander down the sidewalk. I’d run three blocks, maybe, and I rubbed my neck and shoulders firmly with a slight wince.Note to self… never run again.My feet hurt— my back hurt— everything hurt, and I regretted escaping.

Reaching into my jacket pocket, I pulled out the few folded bills I had and scrunched up my face in a grimace. Somehow, I’d managed to snag 32 American dollars, but I was pretty sure that wouldn’t get me far today. Rolling my lips between my teeth as I counted the bills, I walked down the street aimlessly.

“Oh— I could get a sandwich.” Mumbling to myself, I stuffed my money back in my pocket to crane my neck. There weren’t many signs around, and I couldn’t read them anyway. Wiggling my lips as I walked leisurely, my gaze traveled from window to window looking for a sign with a picture on it. “… One with ham and cheese.”

I ducked into the first place I saw that had a sign with a sandwich, and the smell of bread slithered up into my nostrils to water my mouth. The place wasn’t too busy— the line was three people long, and only a few tables were taken. Whipping out my phone, I navigated to the translation app I had installed as I stood in line. A long showcase of toppings stretched almost the length of the counter, and I licked my lips heavily.