Page 29 of The Ranger (Black Hawke Security #5)

SCARLETT

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“H ey.” Cole walks in and tosses his keys and wallet on the table by the entrance.

“Hey,” I reply, my heart thumping inside my chest. I shouldn’t be so excited to see him. He’s only been gone a few hours.

Zara makes some cute baby sounds in my arms, and he immediately crosses the space and leans down to tickle her cheek and then kiss her tiny mouth.

“How’s my beautiful little girl? Daddy’s home.”

I smile at how adorable he is with her, and our eyes lock when he lifts his face.

“I’ve been imagining saying that for months. Daddy is home,” Cole says, and there’s so much emotion in his eyes.

“How does it feel?”

“Kinda fucking awesome.” He smiles sideways.

“Language.” I mock slap his arm, then regret it when the feel of his bicep under my fingers makes me squirm.

Cole sits on the coffee table and leans his forearms on his thighs, looking me in the eye. His smile has vanished, and he looks serious.

“What?” Panic stirs inside me.

“Scar, Chen Lee-Park has been captured.”

Oh.

The relief is instant. That horrible man is no longer a threat to me or Zara. A million tons lift off my shoulders.

“That’s awesome. How did they catch him?”

Cole launches into a summarized story of how they tracked him and eventually caught up with him at LAX.

He doesn’t go into detail, but he touches on Chen having some classified information that could’ve been a national threat. Or worse.

I can’t believe I got caught up in such a serious situation.

While he’s talking, I realize what this means for me and Zara.

We need to go home.

We no longer need to stay with Cole as there is no danger. My eyes dip as I search for any other reason and can’t find one. He’s still talking.

I’m a monster for wishing that horrible man was still on the run, but I do.

Despite our argument last night and how angry I am with him I don’t want to leave. I’m scared, and... I like being here. Sure, his house is a million times nicer than mine, but there’s something that feels right about us all being together.

Of hearing him say, Daddy’s home.

In the way we’ve fumbled together the past few days working out how to be parents. The way he hugged me when I cried, freaking out. The way I rubbed his arm when he got the nappy wrong, telling him it’s okay, you can take it outside and shoot it if you’ll feel better.

I glance around and imagine another woman living here with him, while Zara spends her other week or weekends with her dad.

Tears prickle my eyes.

How I’ll just be a better version of my mom with no career and spend my days working for Cassy, carpooling, making lunches and doing housework.

No offense to moms worldwide, but I had dreams. And I don’t resent Zara; I love her with all my heart. She deserves what I never had. All of me—or at least as much of me as I can spare.

But there won’t be time for me to grow my career. Not for years. Or ever. By then I might give up.

While Cole and his new woman/wife/girlfriend/person-I-hate-already will thrive and support one another—

“Scar. Are you listening?”

“What?” I blink.

Christ, talk about going down a rabbit hole.

“Yeah, that great. Amazing. Far out. Yeah, so um, it’s good they caught him.”

Cole lowers his brows, then straightens, letting out a long sigh.

It’s time to go.

You think I want you to stay so I can have sex on tap and my daughter here full-time?

This is his chance.

Now.

To tell me I was wrong and that...I don’t know. That maybe he might want to be with me.

I wasn’t asking you to marry me, Scarlett.

God, I’m an idiot.

Cole has had almost five months, and now that his daughter is here, he’s directly told me he doesn’t want to commit.

Stop being pathetic, Scarlett Walton.

Leave.

“Yeah. So. I should um, I should get packed and head home.” I shuffle to the edge of the sofa. Our eyes meet for what feels like eternity. As if one of us is waiting for the other to say something.

Zara breaks the silence with a baby gurgle.

“Can you take her? She needs to be put down, so I need to hurry.” I lift her, and Cole immediately slides his hands under her little body and places her against his chest.

God, it makes me want to cry watching him cuddle our daughter.

She is so tiny.

He is so big and muscular.

We stand at the same time, Cole gently bouncing Zara.

I find my phone then head towards the bedroom.

“Scar,” his voice is gravel, eyes vulnerable when I turn. “Why don’t you stay?”

I almost sob.

“This isn’t our home,” I reply softly.

“What if it was?” He takes a step but stops.

I shake my head and glance at the floor.

I know why he wants us to stay. Like me, he’s come from a broken family, and this feels like our chance. But he already said he doesn’t want to get married, and in time he’ll realize this—me—isn’t what he wants.

If he did, he’s had enough time to spit it out.

The only thing he’s ever shown is lust, and to be fair, that he cares. But that’s who Cole is. He’s a big, gorgeous, kind protector.

As tempting as it is for Zara’s sake to say yes, I can’t. She deserves to have two parents who get along and don’t resent one another. That’s what would happen if I said yes right now.

“Cole, I get it. I wish this were different. That together we could be this perfect family for our little girl, and that—”

He’s in front of me with Zara before I can blink.

“Then let’s try. For her. Can’t you just...don’t you feel anything for me?” he asks.

What?

Tears build in my eyes.

Why did he ask that?

I wasn’t asking you to marry me, Scarlett.

Those words hit me in the face, reminding me how I sat in my filth praying he would find us just days ago. How I thought I loved him, but the entire time, I was just another woman he needed saving.

Cole is going to be in my life forever because of Zara. Falling in love, getting married.

I have my own pride to protect.

“Of course, I care,” I say, instead of confessing the truth. “But I can’t be with a man who wants me because I gave birth to his child. I want someone who loves me. Who returns—”

“Returns what?”

Shit.

“Returns what, Scar?” Cole cups my face.

Goddamn my big mouth.

I fish mouth it for a few seconds as his brows get higher and higher.

“You—Scarlett. Fuck. Stay right fucking there.”

He strides down the hall while I mutter something about not swearing in front of Zara and wrap my arms around myself.

Why am I staying put?

He’s not the boss of me. And nothing is going to change here.

I hear Zara crying for about thirty seconds, then it’s quiet.

I remain standing on the exact spot, trying to think of an ending to that sentence that doesn’t end with my feelings.

I’ll blame hormones or lack of sleep.

Cole strides back down the hallway looking fierce and...he doesn’t stop. I straighten as he comes at me with force, slides his hands into my tangled hair and smashes his mouth to mine.

Whoa.

Holy hell.

My body explodes into a state of arousal, and when he wraps his body around me, his cock hardening and pressing into my softness, I can’t help it. I lift my hands to his neck and let him kiss me like I’ve imagined a man would all my life.

Like he loves me.

Like I belong to him.

Like he’s never letting go.

Never.

When our mouths part, the fire in Cole’s eyes almost scares me.

“I do fucking love you, you crazy woman.”

Normally I’d kick someone’s ass for calling me crazy. Despite any evidence. Right now, I’m drowning in the emotions boiling inside me.

“You want to fuck me.”

“Yes. I want to fuck you. I want to wring your damn neck, too. But I love you, Scarlett Walton. I love you. I love Zara. And I’m not letting either of you go without a fight.”

He’s panting.

I almost smile, but I’m still scared.

“Now it’s your turn because I know you feel something for me. Finish that damn sentence.”

“Well, I—”

“Scarlett.”

I smile, dipping my head to his chest.

He loves me. Cole Zimbardo loves me.

He takes my chin and lifts my face. “Say it. If this is because of my father—”

“What?” I ask, frowning. “I like your dad.”

I’ve only met him once. They have a troubled relationship, but so do I with my mom. So I’ve never judged him for it.

“Yeah, but he cheated and left my mom, so I understand why you’d not want a man who—”

I slap his chest.

“Is that why you haven’t told me how you feel?”

He blinks.

“You think I think you’re like your dad?!” I gasp. “Cole, you are nothing like him.”

I can see he doesn’t believe me. Drawing in a breath, I drop my head to his chest. “Yes, I love you.”

“What? I can’t hear you.”

I lift my face, and he’s smiling, eyes glossy, and I know mine are, too.

“I love you,” I whisper. “Please don’t hurt me. I don’t let many people into my heart, but Cole Zimbardo, I love you.”

He tugs me over to the sofa and leans his ass on the edge, pulling me between his legs.

“Marry me.”

My eyebrows almost take off and land in Alaska.

“Are you on drugs?”

Cole laughs. “No. Marry me. We have a daughter. I love you. You love me. I don’t want us to be apart. You two are my everything.”

Oh, my god.

My heart triples in size, and I feel like I’m floating.

“I didn’t think I was ready when I first met you; otherwise, we would’ve been dating when we realized you were pregnant.”

I try to pull back.

“Okay, well that doesn’t exactly give me confidence. You chose to play the field instead of asking me out? Great. If you plan to mention that in your wedding vows, don’t.”

“Is that a yes?”

“No, it’s not a bloody yes.”

It is a yes.

I am marrying this man, but I am not going to let him get away with saying that and not find out more.

“Are you sure? Just because Zara is born doesn’t mean—”

“Stop. I am sure. I want you and our daughter. I want more kids. I want to be the husband and father that my mom deserved. For you. For me. For our kids.”

I place my hand on his face and seek the answers in his eyes.

“I felt like a failure the moment you said you were pregnant. Like I was already my messed-up dad.”

“Cole.” I shake my head.

“I did fuck up.” He covers my hand.

“You haven’t fluffed anything up.” I pat his chest. “We use that word now, Daddy.”

“Fine. Fluff.” He nods, and I swear my heart just swelled a thousand times its size seeing this huge Army Ranger say fluff.

My walls dissolve as we both become completely vulnerable with one another.

“Cole, we both did it. Not you. Not me. Without both of us, Zara wouldn’t exist. Trust me, I’ve masturbated a lot of times and never gotten pregnant.”

“Do not say masturbate.” He groans.

I smirk. “Sorry, rubbed my clit. ”

“Jesus, woman.” His hand slides down my back, cupping my thigh, and he lifts it up across one of his legs.

“What are you doing?” My brows shoot up.

“Considering coercion. Say yes, and I’ll make you come.” His fingers brush the edge of my pussy.

“Wow, as far as proposals come, they don’t get any more romantic than this.” I lean into him, not really complaining.

Next minute he tugs down my leggings, and I’m gasping.

“Wow, okay, let’s just totally forgo any pretense that you aren’t—”

Christ!

He scoops me up, lays me on the sofa and climbs between my legs. I’m not going to lie, I want this so much.

He face plants my pussy and latches onto my clit, eyes on me the entire time.

“Say yes,”

“Oh, fuck,” I clutch the sofa with one hand, his hair with my other. When his fingers enter me, I feel the remnants of pain from childbirth, but it’s not enough to stop him. Not when my body is thrumming with desire.

“Scar,” Cole palms thighs, pressing them open wider, then laps at me some more. He does this exaggerated lick, then grins. “Say you’ll be my wife.”

“What are we going to tell our kids?” I gasp, lifting off the sofa.

“That we went to the Niagara Falls, and I got down on my knees because, my god, you are wet,”

I almost laugh, but he lifts my butt and sucks my clit until I scream.

I’m still shuddering when he undoes his pants, rips them off and climbs over me.

Cole lines up his cock. “Sweetheart, you belong to me. You have from the moment I laid eyes on you, and you tried selling me some damn T-shirt. You, Zara, and the baby we’re making right fluffing now.”

Well, who could say no to an offer like that?

I cup his face. “Fuck me, Cole.”

“Say yes.”

Goddamn him.

I need his cock.

But I also don’t want to live without him. Knowing he held back thinking he wasn’t good enough for us because I thought he was like his dad...that just breaks my heart.

Cole has been by my side, annoyingly so, since the day I showed up at BHS and loudly announced I was pregnant with his baby.

He’s saved me in more ways than one. Now I realize Zara and I are saving him, too.

We belong together.

“Yes, I’ll marry you, Cole Zimbardo. Yes, I’ll be your wife,” I cry as he slides deep inside me.

Deep, purposeful and rough.

Just how I like it.

“Mine.” He growls, slamming his hand on the sofa behind me, then drops to kiss my lips. “Forever.”

Forever.

Words I never thought I’d hear from a man.