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L ogan’s anxiety had my hackles up. The longer we were apart, the worse it got, and not just because I was physically too far away from a new bondmate. Whatever she was learning felt like we weren’t going to like it.

The nest hadn’t imploded in our absence, though I suspected that had a lot to do with the fact that all of the children had gone to safety and the remaining adults had carried on with the orgy until they’d collapsed, too exhausted and satisfied to worry about much for a while.

I listened with half an ear while Shakti updated Yelena, Seth perched on my shoulders in his smallest form.

Fuck knew where Velda and Kendrick were, but they seemed chill in the bond, besides the undercurrent of panic and anguish flooding down from Logan.

How bad do you think it is? I asked Seth.

If I were a morbid person I’d say we should start taking bets on how many people are going to die to take this thing out.

I twitched, struggling with Logan’s pain.

The witch felt more deeply than I was used to; Seth did too, but I liked having this window into them.

Even inside her own head Yelena had control of herself, though it was easy to pick out the subtle ways in which she reacted to Logan from how well I knew her.

We need a Protectors meeting as soon as you’re ready , Logan said, voice ringing through my head. Plus pack members.

A shiver of nerves flooded down the bond.

At least we wouldn’t have to wait too long to find out what horrors she had learned. I had already done a quick round with Seth, checking on the whole of the nest to make sure nothing had managed to fall apart while we were busy.

I paced a circle around Yelena. Shakti could finish updating her at the meeting.

“All right, we’ll go upstairs,” Yelena assured me, dropping a hand to my forehead. “Should we meet in Calliope’s suite?”

Shakti’s eyes lost focus for a moment before she nodded. “Yeah, she wants to be included in this, and Estrella is starting a cart for us.”

Another ripple of panic washed over us.

What’s wrong? I sent back to Logan.

Too many things. I don’t know what all to talk about.

Estrella appeared with a cart laden with water, coffee, and cookies. It appeared our stock was running low since it was a far cry from the platters of fresh fruit and pastries we usually got for meetings.

We took it up ourselves, everyone convening in Calliope’s suite. She was seated in her living area, rather than at the dining table, her feet up in a recliner. Her face brightened when we arrived. “Thank the gods. I’ve been bored as fuck.”

Yelena kissed her cheek. “I’m sure that will be corrected shortly.”

Logan swept in, dressed in one of Yelena’s shorter gowns, her hair pulled back in a ponytail, her eyes haunted.

Caden looked no better.

Kendrick was already getting Logan a cookie and a cup of coffee, nudging her to sit.

She inhaled the sweet treat, sipping more slowly on the drink, and thankfully the sugar seemed to help settle her, if only a little.

I sat by her side, laying my head in her lap, her hands moving automatically to stroke my fur.

“Precious, what did Anya say?”

Seth climbed into Logan’s arms, headbutting beneath her chin. She whimpered softly, clutching Seth as she sorted through the chaos tumbling around in her head.

Caden settled next to Logan with a cup of water. He scratched Seth behind the ears, a bolt of anguish bursting out of my lover.

What?

Caden just told me about something they found out about him and me.

Before I could ask more about it, Logan drew in a sharp breath. “I don’t know how to start, so I’m just going to say I’m sorry. If I had known, I swear I wouldn’t have bonded anyone.”

Hackles went up around the room.

“You’re going to have to explain a bit more, precious,” Yelena said, prompting her.

Seth squeaked from how hard Logan was holding him.

“I have to give up my magic to the monster, willingly. I can’t just let it take it.

But the only way I can get close enough to do that and survive is to let it siphon off magic.

It’s going to keep consuming. I’m a conduit to all of you with the matebond, so it’s going to take from everyone while it’s taking from me. ”

Yelena set up stiffly. “You’ve borrowed before and I recovered just fine. Why are you so worried about this time?”

Tears slipped down Logan’s cheeks. “There won’t be a recovery this time. Anya said the monster taking everything except our lives is a best-case scenario.”

My whole body went taut as I processed her words. So if we survive, we…

“Will lose your shifting, yes.” Sorrow burned brightly in my omega, the weight of it sitting on all of our shoulders. “I won’t be able to help anyone like I did with Seth. I’ll have nothing left to give, assuming I don’t die in the process.”

I shivered. Losing our shifter abilities was a base fear for all of our kind, and was one of the most nerve-wracking things about being ill or injured. The thought of being trapped in a single form for the rest of my life made my stomach turn so hard I nearly threw up.

Logan swallowed hard. “Anya made it clear that part of how the monster is healed is by everything being voluntary. This isn’t just my sacrifice to make. I can’t stop it from happening, but it’s the only way. If we don’t get this to work, even more lives will be lost.”

Yelena pulled in a sharp breath and ran her hand over my fur, a testament to how agitated she was. “We should make plans.”

“For dying?” Velda asked quietly.

“If we don’t have our core of magic, we won’t be able to access our artifacts. The nest would be unprotected. Maybe we should choose some others to take over if needed.”

A lot of ifs. Logan had made it pretty clear what was going to happen, and it didn’t sound like this was an if situation, more like a when .

“Logan will keep the torque,” Kendrick announced. “If it’s useless at the end of this, so be it.”

“Who would we even choose to take over Protector positions?” Shakti asked. “Isn’t that something that would be left to the Council?”

Velda sighed. “Yes and no. It will be easier all around if we can have a plan in place. They’ll probably just roll with it.”

“All right, then,” said Yelena, “Let’s entertain the possibility that the Protectors bonded to Logan will be unable to continue their duties.

Who would we leave in charge in our stead?

I think Cora would be a good option. She’d be able to help the others adjust to their new roles, though it might be better to keep her as nest manager for that purpose. ”

The others nodded.

“Who else?” Yelena asked.

“Margaret,” Kendrick suggested. “She already runs the library with an iron fist. She could handle the nest.”

“All in favor of Margaret?” Calliope asked.

All of the Protectors raised their hands. Surreal didn’t even begin to cover watching them plainly discuss their replacements if they died. They weren’t allowed to fucking die.

“Estrella would kick ass,” Velda added. “I would trust her with the nest, given how she runs her kitchen.”

“All in favor?”

Another unanimous acceptance.

“Dr. Atling?” Logan offered.

And just like that the replacements for Yelena, Kendrick, and Velda had been selected. I hated it. I didn’t care that those chosen would do an excellent job; this wasn’t how things were supposed to work.

Velda looked frighteningly dead in the eyes when she suggested, “We should get a will in place so that our fortunes stay with the nest.”

I growled, shooting to my feet. Are you all seriously accepting death so easily?

“Accepting is a bold word choice,” Velda replied.

“We can’t leave the nest undefended and underfunded,” Yelena said firmly. “If I have to be willing to give up the core of myself to this fucking creature, I have to know the nest will be cared for when I can’t do it anymore.”

Logan cried quietly, wrapped in Caden’s arms, Seth clutched in hers. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

I couldn’t think with so many layers of panic stacked on top of me in the bond. I shook myself head to toe, trying to dispel some of it, but there was too much between everyone.

What happens if we don’t give it up willingly?

“Then it might not work. We could all just die and the creature would take what it can, then keep searching for someone to heal it.”

Is there anyone else, though?

“Not that would help us.”

I was going to vibrate out of my own skin at this rate.

“Anya said we have to make peace with this.”

Fuck that. I had made peace with plenty of things in my lifetime, but this was beyond the pale.

How could I give up my shifting willingly?

I didn’t even know what form I would take.

Everything felt more comfortable when I was a wolf, but that would limit a lot of things I could do with my mates.

It seemed almost silly to worry about that, but the thought of never being able to kiss them again, to hold them…

Part of the reason being a wolf was so comfortable was because I had the option to not be one when needed.

Any form could become a cage if I could never change it.

“How soon is all of this going to happen?” Kendrick asked.

“I don’t know.” Logan sniffled. “Soon, before we run out of supplies.”

“This is all fucked. The stupid monster is ruining my groove.” Calliope groaned, pressing her hand to her rounded stomach, her face pinching.

Murdoch was already at her side, but instantly on high alert.

Calliope squeaked, eyes going wide. “Oh, shit. My water just broke.”