Page 37

I woke in the nest, sandwiched between Velda and Caden, the others in their smallest forms sprawled across my body. My stomach growled loudly, Mini Kendrick lifting his head to look at me.

I’ll get you some food. Craving anything in particular?

Literally anything.

He nodded, tippy-toeing his way off me and out of the nest before shifting back to his human form. Juice and pasta salad? Estrella brought it down in the cooler a couple hours ago.

Sounds great.

Kendrick settled next to me with the bounty, lifting off our packmates so he could drag me onto his lap and feed me.

The pasta salad was loaded up with veggies, cubed ham, and hard boiled eggs.

All in all, it was a pretty good recovery food.

He didn’t give me a huge portion, a wise choice considering I wasn’t sure the last time I had put solid food in my stomach.

The juice was like an elixir, hydrating me and sugaring me up at the same time.

Has everyone else eaten? I asked him.

Your guess is as good as mine.

The bond lit up as everyone fully woke. Kendrick twitched and Velda squeezed her eyes shut.

Hecate, I don’t want them to be uncomfortable. What do I do?

Hello, little star. The world around me warped, drawing my spirit to the forest with her. I fell into her arms, my body illuminating at her touch.

How do I stop the bond from hurting them?

It will quiet on its own in time. They need to let the waves carry them, rather than try to fight them.

Everyone needs to adjust to the new push and pull of their shared existence.

They may learn to control it without your intervention.

The bond feels different to each person, and some find it more comfortable from the start than others.

But I muted it before. How do I do that again on purpose?

She settled onto the moss, wisps of starlight and shadow dancing around the edges of her robes. That was the bond responding to your own needs at the time. You’ll have to practice for it to be a purposeful thing.

Great. Another item on the list of things I had to get good at on a really fucking short timeline.

What happens now?

What do you mean, dearest?

Nerves twisted in my belly. I have to face that monster sooner or later, right? There’s no solution in waiting it out.

Correct.

How do I do that, though?

I know you would prefer I give you a simple answer, but everything that occurs must be your own doing, your own choice. Telling you could influence the outcome.

But…

You must have faith in yourself and your mates.

She sent me back to them with no real information, but I had faith in her, and she seemed to have faith in me figuring things out, so I’d have to lean into that for now. I didn’t love it, but if that was the only option, I had no choice but to suck it up and keep pushing forward.

“She lives.” Seth kissed my cheek. “Goddess visit?”

“Yep.”

“Anything interesting?”

“Just her being unhelpfully cryptic but supportive. You know, the usual.” I reached for Velda, lacing our hands together.

I wasn’t entirely sure how to help her with the overwhelming energy of sharing the bond.

Even just my touch stole a bit of her tension.

Visualization had always worked well for me when I was meditating, so I supposed it didn’t hurt to try.

I pulled her to my chest and imagined a blanket of green light draping over her, a gentle and protective cocoon.

She melted against me, the tightness in her muscles surrendering.

Witchcraft , Velda murmured in my head.

“It helped?”

She nodded, nuzzling closer to me, wedging her face into the curve of my throat. I have enough screaming in my own head. Don’t need to add more. I’m sure the others appreciate you shutting me up a little.

I frowned. That’s not what I was trying to do. I like sharing space with you.

Sorry, sorry. I get self-deprecating when I stress people out.

Yelena stretched her little cat body and walked up mine, tiny paws finding my internal organs before she flopped down beneath my chin so she could shove between Velda and me. Your anxiety doesn’t translate as much as you think it does, and in any case, I would rather know so I can help.

“Exactly.” I played with Velda’s hair, the strands like silk between my fingers. “Sharing the connection means we can help each other, sense stress and fear, and intervene as necessary to mitigate it. It’s not a bad thing to need support.”

“You already have so much stress, though,” Velda replied. “I don’t want to add to it.”

Yelena wriggled, offering Velda her belly to pet. She didn’t say anything, but I knew she was trying to work the same magic Caden had always used for me. And it worked. The longer Velda rhythmically stroked Yelena’s fur, the more they both relaxed, Yelena’s purr vibrating her whole body.

A flare of surprise from Kendrick in the bond had me turning to see Seth climbing into his arms in his cat form, his amulet around his neck.

I wasn’t sure where he had put it during the heat, but I was glad it was accessible for him.

Kendrick cradled the purring black lump, Seth’s eyes closing and his purr rumbling.

Can I stop being in people form? Haru asked, looking blatantly at Kendrick.

My stag’s anxiety tumbled through the bond, but he nodded anyway. Haru melted into his wolf form and flopped down, laying his head on Kendrick’s legs.

Feeling them navigate the bond together was interesting. Haru was completely chill, and Kendrick could directly experience that, all of the predators being calm, and it helped his tension leak away slowly.

This is fucking weird , Kendrick said.

“Because you have a wolf on you and you don’t want to sprint into the night?” I asked.

Kendrick nodded stiffly. It’s like the bond is arguing with my instincts. I’ve never been able to fully know that there’s no harm intended. It’s harder to be afraid.

Good. Haru huffed, tail giving a few wags. This is my preferred form, but I’d have suffered through a human one long-term if I needed to.

Kendrick set a tentative hand on Haru’s shoulder, stroking the thick pelt. It was a curious mix of awe and nervousness, like he had never in his wildest dreams expected to touch Haru in any friendly way.

Caden joined our pile in the cat form, curling around my head like a little hat.

Velda laughed. “Logan, you are too fucking cute.”

“What did I do?”

“Feels like you’re going to vibrate onto another plane of existence over the Caden hat.”

“It’s not my fault he knows how to be exceptionally precious.”

“Never said it was.” Velda snuggled closer. “Just saying it’s cute as fuck. I like being able to feel how jazzed you are about all of us. Never felt so wanted in my life. Hey, no, don’t feel bad about that.”

It wasn’t exactly a downside, but I wasn’t used to everyone reading me quite so clearly.

Caden planted his forehead on mine, an excellent distraction from the swell of guilt that my sweet bear hadn’t been getting the love she deserved. I turned so I could reach her mouth, trying to pour all my affection into her through my kiss.

“Whoa,” Velda said with a laugh as she pulled away. “Gonna give me a head rush.”

Yelena licked my chin with her sandpaper tongue and stretched all the way out until her back toes touched Kendrick. We all get to have a crash course on experiencing the bond together. Secrecy is basically gone, so everyone has to be honest about their needs. No steeping in misery unnecessarily.

Caden sighed, rubbing his cheeks against my hair. I wish I was in there with everyone.

Me too. Fucking Rachel ruining this for him and me.

Panther, said Yelena, even without the bond, you know her best. We’ll figure out a way to let you join us when this is all over.

It was probably a poor consolation, and I didn’t envy Caden the isolation of being the only one here outside the bond.

I wanted him with us, but I understood his need to protect us from the unknown.

We had no guarantees Rachel wouldn’t do something if we were all connected to her, but just because I understood didn’t mean I liked it.

Seth slithered out of Kendrick’s grasp to headbutt me. It’ll be okay, Lo. Also, I have a question.

Ask away.

Do you mind if I bond Haru?

Why would I mind?

He shrugged as best as he was able in house cat form. Just checking before I do it. Seth looked over his shoulder at where Haru lay across Kendrick’s legs. His bond with you is super fresh, so I would understand if you wanted us to wait a bit.

Your bonding works on your own timeline. If Haru is ready for another, don’t wait on my account.

Seth pressed his forehead to my cheek, purring loudly. Love you.

I love you, too.

The two of them departed to head up to Yelena’s suite, Seth nestled on Haru’s back. I didn’t love the distance with the bond so new, but I didn’t begrudge them wanting privacy after so much public intimacy.

In the meantime, I needed a nap. My whole body was still flush with power, but my brain was exhausted. Kendrick and Velda cuddled up on me, Caden remaining my hat, and Yelena a stretched out kitty between Kendrick and me.

Affection from all angles was inescapable. I hummed happily. I love all of you.

A ripple of delight slid through the bond, the chorused response of We love you too , sending me to sleep with a smile on my face.