Page 47

CHAPTER 46

EMERY

Friday morning

Emery

I’m texting you idiots first, so you need to keep this secret

Forrest

Who are you calling idiots?

Wyatt

You and Logan, clearly

No, I mean all of you

Camden

Not me

You most of all, Mr. Twice Divorced

Camden

But I’m also Mr. Finally Married Forever This Time, I’ve matured

You don’t get flowers for finally maturing at the ripe old age of thirty-nine, idiot number one

Camden

Did you call this family meeting just to be mean to us? That’s fine, but I need to make my wife coffee, so I’m multi-tasking

No, I have news

Forrest

Mom told us about New York

And what did she say?

Wyatt

Never mind that, what’s your news?

Forrest

That is her news, dummy

Wyatt

No, DUMMY, she said she was telling us first, so whatever it is, it’s not about going to New York for fancy ass chef training

Logan

Are you going to the national team training camp?

No, I’m done with hockey

Camden

What?

Wyatt

Why?

Forrest

How?

Logan

Seriously?

Emery

I mean, I actually quit hockey two years ago and none of you noticed, but anyway, that is also not my news

Camden

Sorry, okay, what’s up?

You can’t freak out

Forrest

Shit, you’re pregnant

Oh fuck right off

Logan

She’s totally pregnant

Unlike you MORONS, I know how to use birth control

Logan

Ew, that means she’s having sex, tho, don’t like that mental picture

Stop talking about me like I didn’t initiate this lovely chat

Camden

Hang on, who doesn’t know how to use birth control?

Wyatt

We all do, she’s distracting us

Forrest

What are you distracting us from?

Logan

Emery?

Wyatt

I think she’s dipped out of the chat

Camden

Logan, you asshole

Logan

It wasn’t me

Wyatt

I’ll talk to her

* * *

Friday afternoon

Emery

What are you wearing tonight?

Shannon

That sounds suspiciously like a WAG question

Shhhh

What does this mean for your training?

Oh, I’m going to New York…with Alexei’s full support

Ahhhh I love it!

So I’m going to soak up tonight as the last home game I’ll see for a while… I’ll try to come back for playoff games that fall on my days off, though

How low-key shhhh is this WAG status? Can I order you a jacket?

OMG

I tried to tell my brothers this morning but they were obnoxious so I left the group chat

I’ll order a jacket. You don’t have to wear it for anyone but Alexei, in private

I can’t believe you just typed that

If you haven’t worn his jersey and nothing else yet, I highly recommend

Oh, I have

Okay, yes, order me a WAG jacket

* * *

Saturday morning

Wyatt

Come back to the group chat and tell us your news

Emery

Not until everyone agrees to mature about the fact that I have as much right to a healthy sex life as the next Granger

Shocker at the crickets

* * *

Sunday afternoon

Emery

Hey Mom, just wanted to let you know that I’m flying to New York on Tuesday morning (and yes, we found a nanny)

Mom

I’m glad it all worked out

Alexei is being very supportive and excited for me

Of course he is

That was a leading statement

I don’t understand

Nevermind

* * *

Monday morning

Forrest

Okay, we respect you as an autonomous adult who can make her own relationship choices

Emery

You didn’t write that yourself

Forrest

Lady friend helped

Does she know you call her your lady friend?

Forrest

It turns her on

Great

Logan

We’re all ears

Wyatt

I agree that lady friend makes you sound like a retiree, Forrest

Forrest

Nothing retiree about my game, brother

Emery

Hey, focus!

Camden

Yep, right, Emery’s having sex and we’re all cool about that, bring on the details

Logan

Hey

Forrest

Whoa

Wyatt

Maybe no details, just the high level news headline

Definitely no details

Logan

So you’re seeing someone?

Camden

Is it serious?

Forrest

Is it anyone we know?

Emery

Shit, Inessa just… brb

* * *

Monday afternoon

Forrest

Does she know that brb means be right back?

Wyatt

Hope everything is okay over there

Logan

I called her and she sent back a do-not-disturb text because it’s nap time

Camden

Speaking of which, I need to have a nap, too

Forrest

You playing tonight?

Wyatt

How do you not know our schedules?

Forrest

Unless you’re on the other side of the face-off dot tonight, it’s irrelevant to me

Logan

They don’t let you take face-offs

Emery

Okay, I’m back, she’s finally asleep

Oh, do you guys have to go? Is this not a good time?

Logan

It’s the perfect time

Wyatt

We’re all ears

Camden

Tell us!

Forrest

Emery Granger, who are you banging?

Emery

Your best friend (sorry not sorry, I actually love him)