Page 34 of The Lilac River (Silver Peaks #1)

Golden – Harry Styles

Lily

N ash’s hand slid to the back of my head, drawing me deeper into the kiss.

I didn’t need his help—I was already desperate for him.

My fingers dug into the hard muscle of his back as I tumbled headfirst into the abyss of him, of us.

My skin blazed, every nerve ending sparking with every sweep of his tongue.

This kiss wasn’t like the one in the bar, bitter and angry. This was need and promise, euphoria roaring in my veins. Everything melted away until it was just us, Nash and me, devouring each other like the world was ending.

His hand gripped my ass, dragging me flush against him. He was as hard as rock behind his jeans, and I shivered with anticipation. Nash had been good when we were kids, but he was a man now. A man who moved with purpose, whose touch made me ache in ways I’d forgotten.

“Nash,” I whispered as his hand ghosted across my breast, sending tingles straight to my core.

“You taste better than I remember without the anger,” he ground out, gripping me harder.

He was everything I ever wanted, and if it weren’t for the wetness pooling between my thighs, the burn in my chest, I would’ve thought I was dreaming.

“I need to know something.” His deep voice was a rasp against my ear, mouth trailing fire along my neck.

“What?” I gasped, arching into him.

He cupped my face, forcing me to meet his eyes. “Tell me why you left.”

The bottom dropped out of my world. His frown, the hard line of his jaw, it wasn’t lust anymore. It was a man demanding truth.

I froze. The weight of my mother’s life, of everything I’d protected, chained my tongue. I couldn’t say it. I couldn’t.

“Don’t you dare lie to me again,” Nash ground out, his voice breaking. “Otherwise as much as it’ll kill me this won’t happen.”

His hands moved to cup my face as he studied me. “Tell me why you left.”

And just like that, every heightened sense tumbled back to earth and flatlined and tears burned behind my eyes. I shook my head. "I can't."

Breathing heavily, we watched each other, wary and fearful of the words unsaid and the memories that had been brought to the surface. When I realized what my silence would mean, a shot of realism in my heart roused me from the what ifs.

I turned toward the door. “I can’t be here.”

"You can’t leave, Lila." He grabbed my wrist, desperation crackling off him. "The storm’s wild. You’ve got no car. Just tell me the damn truth."

Yanking free, I ran.

“Lily, no. Get back here.”

I kept on running.

Rain lashed my face as I tore across the porch, down the steps, into the storm. The dress clung to my body, freezing me instantly. But I didn’t stop.

"Lily, get back here!" Nash roared behind me. "You left your purse! Lily!"

I ran harder. But I never stood a chance.

He caught me just as I hit the edge of the lavender field, grabbing my arm and spinning me into his chest.

“You’re crazy,” he growled in my ear. “What the hell are you doing?”

"I can't do this!" I sobbed. “I can’t be near you!”

His arm locked around my waist. Rain streamed over us.

“You think I want this?” His voice broke. “To stand here knowing there’s a lie between us?”

"Let me go," I whispered, trembling.

He did. I staggered, bolting again but he caught me easily, spinning me back, his eyes black with pain and want.

"Do you have any idea," he hissed, "how hard it is to hate someone and still want them?"

Thunder cracked as he slapped a hand to his chest. "You were always my ending, Lila."

"Nash—"

He kissed me, hard, bruising, and I opened for him without hesitation.

The quiver of pleasure returned as Nash’s hands swept down my sides, resting on my hips.

He dragged me closer with a powerful urgency, his fingers digging into me.

He was rock hard behind his jeans and when I dropped my head back and moaned I swallowed rain and wind.

“I wish I could just forget you, Lila. I wish I could ignore the fact you lied.” He nipped at my neck, teeth scraping deliciously against my skin. “I’ve tried so damn hard.”

I moved my mouth back to his, pushing my hand up his shirt to trace the ridged muscles of his stomach.

Ridges that I’d dreamed of for ten years, that I’d remembered as if I had a picture of them.

My memory had played tricks on me because they were so much better than I recalled.

More defined. Harder. When I moved my other hand into the back of his jeans, there was no underwear, just hard, toned ass.

Nash stopped kissing me and stared, silently questioning.

Asking if I wanted more. When I bobbed my head, big hands went to the front of my dress and gripping it pulled it open, sending buttons flying.

Standing in front of him, my white underwear getting soaked by the weather, my hands moved to the button of his jeans.

As Nash dropped his head to take my lace covered nipple into his mouth, I desperately fumbled with wet denim.

The urgency, the hunger between us, was blinding.

“Leave it,” Nash snapped as I huffed with frustration. He grabbed my leg and pulled it up around his waist, and when his hand came to my ass he tapped it. “Get those damn legs around my waist.”

Without any question I did as he told me, wet with desire and throbbing between my thighs.

As my legs tightened, Nash’s kiss became more urgent, and he strode towards the field of lavender.

He walked us between the rows and then dropped to his knees, laying me back on the wet ground.

With the aroma of heady lavender and rain filling the air, Nash looked down on me, reverence and desire staring back at me.

Breathing heavily, I watched as his hands went to the button on his jeans.

He flicked it open, his gaze never leaving mine, and then slowly lowered the zipper and then the jeans until his cock sprung out.

I’d forgotten how beautiful his cock was. Long and smooth, and hard as steel.

“Get rid of the panties,” he commanded.

He licked his lips as he watched me tentatively drag the white lace down my legs. The rain, the lavender, Nash watching me, his cock bobbing, it was seductive and intoxicating and my arousal increased. When he pushed my knees apart and breathed in slowly, I already felt on the edge of an orgasm.

“No condoms,” he rasped.

“I don’t care,” I gasped. “I need you. I trust you.”

He pressed his forehead to mine. “I’m going to fuck you hard, Lila. Hard for leaving me.”

"Please," I begged.

He thrust into me in one brutal stroke, and my cry was swallowed by the storm. The rhythm he set was punishing, savage, the rain masking our desperate sounds. Lavender crushed beneath us, scenting the night with bittersweet memories.

"Feel that?" Nash gritted out, slamming into me. "That's what you left behind."

"I know," I gasped, clinging to him.

His mouth found my neck, teeth scraping skin. "You're mine, Lila. Always have been."

"I still am."

My head dropped to the side, biting on his forearm because the pleasure was almost too much.

When I caught sight of the beautiful purple flowers being battered by the rain, my heart and lungs clenched in time.

So many memories flooded back. The times we’d made love in these fields.

The hours I’d spent working here. The time we walked hand in hand through the rows and Nash expressed his love for me for the first time.

Maybe the memory reflected in my expression, because Nash’s breath hitched as he paused above me.

“Please don’t stop,” I whispered.

His jaw tightened and he started again, even harder, even faster.

I pushed back, keeping up with him thrust for thrust. We kissed, and bit, I sucked his bottom lip into my mouth and pushed my heels against the hard globes of his ass.

My spine stung from being pushed along the ground, my dress no doubt ruined, but I didn’t care. Nash was all I cared about.

The storm was getting wilder around us and as it built so did my orgasm. I knew Nash was close, too. He was biting his bottom lip, and his fingers laced with mine gripped harder. He growled deep in his chest, fingers slipping between us to find my clit, stroking hard.

"Come for me," he demanded. "Come for me here, in our lilac river."

I shattered around him, screaming into the sky as my orgasm ripped through me. Nash followed, burying himself deep, groaning my name like a prayer.

We collapsed together into the lavender, rain soaking us to the bone, hearts beating erratically against each other. I had no regrets. No disappointment. Just joy.

When Nash finally lifted his head, he kissed my lips tenderly.

“You haunted every mile of my life,” he whispered. “And even when I hated you, I never wanted to outrun you.”

Tears slid down my cheeks, mixing with the rain.

“I never stopped loving you,” I whispered.

His mouth curved into a broken, beautiful smile.

“You better be ready for more,” he said hoarsely. “Because when I get you home, Lila, I’m gonna lay you on that dining table like a feast, and I’m never letting you go again.”