Page 17 of The Eternal Mirror (Lucifer’s Mirror #3)

How Many Times Do I Have to Say It...?

A fter leaving the stench of the dungeons behind me, I head slowly back toward our quarters. I have a lot to think about.

Mainly, what do I do next?

I keep telling myself I’ll know what to do tomorrow .

That everything will become clear. But what if there is no tomorrow?

Or tomorrow turns to complete crap. Khronus thinks I was sent by the gods to help him “ascend.” I’m not quite sure how that’s going to work, or what I’ll be expected to do.

But it’s unlikely to be something I’m happy doing, and if I refuse, then he’ll likely use Zayne and Josh to force my hand.

I can’t let that happen .

The fact is, while I’m stuck in the palace, I still can’t make a mirror to take us all out of here.

But—and it’s a big but—my magic is back to full strength.

I can feel it roiling inside me, almost like a live thing desperate to be used.

I hold out my hand, and the celestial fire flickers from my fingertips. Spells are running through my mind.

The problem is, the whole magic thing is relatively new to me, and magic is different for each witch, so there was only so much Hecate could teach me. At this stage, I should be experimenting, playing—though I haven’t been feeling particularly playful recently—finding out what I can do.

Well, there’s no time like the present.

Hmm...what would come in useful? I think for a moment and whisper the words, envisioning the result in my mind...

“Veil the flesh and dim the light.

Hide me now from mortal sight.”

And poof! I’m gone. Invisible. I lift my hand, wave it in front of my face, but there’s nothing there. Wow, I’m good. I could walk straight out of the palace gates, and no one would see me. Immediately, a whole load of interesting scenarios run through my mind.

Maybe not.

But it could definitely come in useful if I want to leave the palace. Right now though...

“Lift the veil and break the night.

Return me now to mortal sight.”

And I’m back .

So, if I really wanted to get us out of here, there’s a good chance I could. And once we’re free of the palace—and whatever dark magic is warding the place—I could make a mirror. We could go anywhere we want.

Another big “but”—I don’t know where I want to go.

An image of Khaosti flickers behind my eyes. And suddenly I can’t breathe.

Guilt rises first. Sharp and sour.

I left him.

Not because I didn’t love him. Because I do. And that made it worse.

I told myself it was to protect him. That if I’d let him come with me, he’d be killed. That I was saving him by walking away.

But that’s not the whole truth.

I left because if I lost him...really lost him...I wouldn’t survive.

I’ve lost too many already. Khendril. Hecate. It seems like every time I let someone in, I lose them.

But Khaos?

He’s not just part of me. He is me. And if he dies—if I have to watch that—I’ll break.Not a little. Not in a “cry it out and move on” way. In a final, unrecoverable way.

So yeah, I left.

Because loving someone like that feels like giving the universe a loaded weapon and daring it to shoot.

If it wasn’t for love, I’d be on a beach in Hawaii. Or Tahiti. With a cocktail in hand. Sun on my face, and Khaos lounging beside me. All long, lean muscle and.. .

What’s the point in thinking about it?

Maybe one day, the world will feel safe enough for me to love him without bracing for the end. But I’m not holding my breath.

My feet slow. I turn toward the wall and bang my forehead against the smooth marble.

I hate freaking marble.

One of the palace guards appears around the corner and stops when he sees me. I consider vanishing, but that’s the coward’s way out. So, I smile and rub my forehead. It hurts. The man doesn’t move, and I look into his face and sigh. I’ve seen that expression before: wonder.

It’s likely my little conversation with Warden Corvus Vahl this morning has started to spread. He gives a little bow. “My lady.”

“Amber,” I say. “My name is Amber.” I nod and walk past. I can feel his eyes on me as I disappear around the corner.

And back to my predicament. I’ve always been nosy, and I want to know what’s going on.

How does Khronus plan to elevate himself to the position of true god ?

Where are the witches? I’m guessing dead, but who knows?

Not me, but I suspect that the answers are here somewhere—maybe locked in Khronus’s head.

I’d love to pry them out with a crowbar.

If I leave now, I’ll likely lose the chance to find out.

I suppose I could get Zayne and Josh to safety and then come back.

That is if I can get them out of the palace, and if there is any safety for them anywhere while Khronus is alive.

I don’t know .

I do know that Zayne wants to be away from here really badly—because he’s told me so.

He’s not used to feeling vulnerable, and Khronus makes him feel that in spades.

If he knew there was a good chance I could get us out of here, then he would have no doubts about the course of action.

I can hear him now— are you fucking crazy? Of course we should get out of here.

My head is going to explode. I don’t want to have to make important decisions. It’s not fair. Hecate would laugh at me for that comment. But thinking of Hecate fills me with pain.

My feet stop moving, and I realize I’m back at our rooms. I’ll sleep on it. Maybe everything will be clear in the morning.

Or not.

I push open the door, and I know immediately that we have a visitor. I can sense magic in the air. A witch. And one I recognize.

I’ve seen remarkably few women here. Khronus has a few tame witches working for him, but otherwise, he seems to surround himself with men—maybe women make him feel uncomfortable. Sheela is seated at the table opposite Zayne; Josh is on the bed curled on his side but awake and watching.

Both Zayne and Sheela stand as I enter.

I cross the room, wrap my arms around her, and give her a big hug. I’m not normally a hugger, but Sheela saved Zayne’s life and helped me rescue Khaos from the dungeons. She deserves a hug.

I finally release her and step back. With her dark hair and golden eyes, she looks so much like Khaosti. Then again, they’re cousins. She looks well, but different from when I last saw her. I think life outside the palace must suit her. The lines of strain are gone from her face.

“Should you be here?” I ask. “Isn’t it dangerous?”

“I was careful. And we have friends here.”

By “we,” I presume she means the rebels.

Maybe I’m finally going to discover something—like exactly what the rebels are rebelling against. Khronus, I presume.

But what do they actually want? And do they have a plan to get it?

It would be nice if someone else actually had a plan, you know, to take the pressure off a little.

“How is Khaosti?” she asks.

“He’s still an asshole,” Zayne mutters, sitting back down at the table.

I cast him a dark glance. “He’s fine,” I say. “He was a little...weird for a while.” Zayne snorts but sensibly doesn’t say anything. “But he’s okay now.” Well, everything is relative, but at least he’s more “okay” than he was.

Well, that’s the pleasantries over; time to get down to business. It must be important for her to risk coming back here. “Why are you here?” I ask, deciding the direct approach is best. “I mean, it’s lovely to see you but...?”

“We heard rumors,” she says.

“You did? What about?” I can guess, and I need a drink. I glance around the room. There’s wine on the side table and glasses, so I bring them over, pour myself a glass, and gulp it down. Then I look at the other two. “You want? ”

Zayne nods, and I pour him a glass, and me another. Sheela shakes her head.

I sit down, blow out my breath, and wait for her to speak.

“We heard that a black alicorn has been seen on Valandria.”

“That’s her,” Zayne says with a nod in my direction.

Sheela’s eyes widen, and she looks at me with awe. “People are saying the goddess has returned.”

“That is not me,” I say. “I am no fucking goddess. And actually, the goddess hasn’t returned because she never really went anywhere. She was just lying low.”

Her eyes widen. “You’ve seen her?”

I nod, and a look of awe flashes across her face.

“There’s more,” she says.

I bet there is.

“We heard that the last battle on Valandria was won by a dragon.”

“A dragon. Wow.” Zayne sounds impressed. I’m guessing he’s going to be pretty pissed by this next bit.

“That’s Khaosti,” I say.

“What?” He slams his glass down. “No way.” Even Josh is sitting up and watching us wide-eyed.

I smirk. “My boyfriend is awesome.”

“But how?” Sheela asks.

I shrug. “Selene gifted him with powers from Vortex to help me destroy Hell.”

“So that’s true as well? ”

“Yup.” She must have spies in the palace to have heard about that. Not many people outside this little circle know. “It’s true.” I pour myself some more wine and sit back, waiting for her to get to the point.

“Khronus likes people to believe that he’s the chosen successor to the First Gods,” she begins. “And he’s convinced a lot of people. But most of what he says is twisted lies. He will do anything to stay in power.”

“It’s more than that,” I say. “He’s up to something. Something big. I don’t suppose you know what?”

She shakes her head.

“I think it has to do with the witches who’ve gone missing. He’s using the magic for something. Maybe coercing them. I don’t know. But we need to find out.”

Sadness flickers across her face; she must be thinking about her mother.

“Maybe we should just all get the fuck off this stupid world,” Zayne says. “Let him have it. Destroy the mirrors so he’s stuck here, like Lucifer was in Hell.”

That has always been one option, but I’m no longer sure it would work. He has magic of his own now. “If he gets his way, I doubt any of us will be safe anywhere.”

“It’s still got to be better than here.” Zayne scowls. “I don’t like it.”

”Well, obviously you don’t. But what in particular? ”

He waves a hand around. “This room, the food and drink, him letting us wander around the palace like we’re fucking guests. He’s got an agenda.”

I really don’t want to say this out loud. I don’t even like thinking about it. But maybe it will put Zayne’s mind at rest at least a little. “I think he’s trying to impress me.”

His eyes narrow. “Why the hell would he want to impress you?”

I sniff at the disbelief in his voice. “I intrigue him.” He still looks skeptical, and I shrug. “Okay, so Khronus had a thing for my mother, and I think he sees me as a sort of substitute. He believes I’m a gift from the gods.”

A look of horror flashes across his face. “That is just gross.”

He’s not wrong there, but maybe it’s time to get back to business. I take a deep breath. “What is it you want from me?” I ask Sheela, though I can guess.

“We want you to side with the rebellion. We want you to stand up and show the people that the goddess is on our side.”

I should have seen that coming.

I gulp the rest of my wine. “I’m not the freaking goddess.” How many times do I have to say that?

“I don’t think it matters. The truth is, you’re as much a goddess as Khronus is a god.”

“So are you,” I point out. All Astralis are descended from the gods Selene and Vortex. It’s all a bit incestuous, if you ask me.

“Please think about it.” She swallows. “We’re losing ground. We need a win—and we need it fast.”

“I will. ”

She exhales. “And if you need to get a message to me, there is a Warden by the name of Corvus Vahl. He is one of us, and you can trust him.”

That’s nice. I liked Corvus. I’m glad he’s on our side.

Sheela gets to her feet. “Then I will leave you to sleep. There is one more thing.”

“There is?”

“The Wolfpack.”

“Khaosti’s old legion?” I ask, already bracing for more drama.

She nods. “What’s left of them. Khronus purged anyone openly loyal to Khaos, but the rest are lying low. If they had proof Khaosti’s alive, they’d rise—and they’d bring others.”

Naturally. Because who better to follow into battle than the reborn goddess with trust issues and her angsty dragon boyfriend? I feel the chains holding me to this world tightening.

I want to wail that it’s not my battle. Not my war. Except Khronus made it mine by kidnapping Zayne and Josh.

So, instead, I sigh. “I’ll see what I can do.”