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THREE

Lilah

“A Mr. William Parry to see you, Lady Rotherwick.”

I looked up from the report I was struggling through to stare at my butler. “I beg your pardon?”

I had heard each of the words, of course, but together they just did not make sense. There was no way William was here. I’d been more than plain three days ago, hadn’t I?

“You’re serious about one thing, and one thing only. And that’s breaking hearts. Well, you’ve broken mine already, Mr. Parry, you don’t need to break it again.”

No, William wasn’t going to see me—and more importantly, I wasn’t going to see him. I was firm in that, as much as I could be about anything.

I’d done what Kineallen and Markham wanted. I’d gone there. And all I had got for my troubles was to be insulted.

“You’ve changed. And you know, I'm not sure if it’s for the better.”

My butler stared. “So…should I show him in?”

“I beg your pardon?” I repeated, putting down the report and turn in my chair to look at him. “What did you say?”

“A Mr. William Parry,” Bellamy said slowly, clearly annunciating each word as though I couldn’t hear. “For you. You must have made an appointment without mentioning it to me.”

There was just a hint of censure in their words, and in most cases, they would be right to do so. I was shocking at remembering to tell my butler when I’d made plans.

But this wasn’t one of those times. “Bellamy, I didn’t—what the hell do you think you’re doing here?”

I had spat the words at the tall, handsome man who had just entered my study.

Mr. William Parry.

Not that he was handsome, I amended silently in my head as Bellamy swiftly left my study, closing the door.

No, William wasn’t handsome. Just, charming. Conventionally attractive, with his light chestnut hair and that smile that had made me pant for him to touch me. Slender and soft hands that had once?—

No .

I pushed all thoughts of what had once been from my mind, and forced myself to glare into the eyes of the man who had broken my heart all that time ago.

Which was probably a mistake.

William grinned. “I knew you’d see me.”

“It’s not as though I’ve had much choice, have I?” I pointed out, trying to keep my anger underneath my words. “At least I had the good manners to send a letter asking?—”

“Demanding,” he said with a pointed look.

I ignored it. “Asking for an appointment. You just turned up here! I don’t know how you managed it. ”

Which was a lie.

Of course I knew how he’d managed it.

I had footmen, loyal servants, and my dear Bellamy to guard against interlopers attempting to enter my townhouse—but it didn’t stop a charmer like William Parry from waltzing into my home, smiling at whoever was opening the door, enchanting his way inside, then smiling at my butler so hard that they couldn’t help but let him in.

Honestly, was I the only one not taken in?

Now, at least.

I pushed aside the memories of just how swiftly I had been taken in by past William, and glared at the present William before me. “What do you want?”

“You, of course,” he said conversationally.

His words shot a bolt of heated panic through my chest.

Me? How could he say that? How could he refer to what we’d had, before he’d ruined it? How could he speak so…so boldly?

I knew my cheeks were pinking, but it was nothing to what was happening inside me. My stomach was churning, my heart was beating painfully, and worst of all…

Worst of all, heat had shot to between my legs.

I swallowed, trying to push aside the desire that rose at hearing William speak to me like that. That commanding tone, that certainty in his voice that he would get what he wanted, that devilish charm that had made him so easy to fall in love with in the first place.

But not again.

I was no longer in love with William Parry, I told myself firmly. Perhaps I hadn’t even been in love with him in the first place. Perhaps it had just felt like love because I’d been so happy.

Before I’d become so miserable.

“I want your time, I suppose I should say,” William said smoothly, not missing a beat as he wandered around my study, looking lazily about. “Nice place.”

Words had never been something I’d struggled with. I was sure my friends thought I was the sort of person to never be without a quip, or a joke. Something to diffuse the tension.

But I couldn’t diffuse this—this whatever it was that was between us. Not tension, but not chemistry, either. Something awkwardly in between.

William had broken my heart, but that didn’t mean I didn’t like the person he had been when I had first met him. Or that I didn’t like the person I had become when I was with him.

All that was in the past, I told myself sternly. I was not in love with him.

And most importantly, I wasn’t going to make that mistake again.

“I like my study, thank you,” I said defensively, as though any comment on my study was a comment on me. Which I supposed, in a way, it was. “Though Kineallen chose the furnishings.”

“Kineallen—the Duke of Kineallen?” William said swiftly.

Was that a hint of jealousy in his tones, or was I just seeing things?

No, surely I was imagining it. William and I were not courting, and never had been, I reminded myself sternly. Hadn’t been associated in any way for years. There was no reason that he would get jealous of me or anyone I knew. Let alone my friend !

“Oh, right, your friend,” said William, his gaze flickering over to the other desk in the room. “And what is that for?”

“For whenever a member of the Gambling Dukes is here and we wish to work together,” I said lightly. “Georgiana, Markham, Kineallen.”

Yes, there was definitely a shot of fire in the man’s eyes as I mentioned the latter. “Bit unusual, isn’t it, the two of you sharing an study.”

I shrugged. “We trust each other, we work together in planning our wagers most often. It made sense.”

“And if he chose furnishings, you chose…”

“Fixtures,” I said shortly.

Was this what we had come to? Discussions about décor?

Don’t get me wrong, it was a beautiful space, and in a way I was proud of it. I wasn’t creative like Georgiana, who managed to see new ways of looking at the world with every passing heartbeat.

But I’d put a lot of work into this place. Chosen a dark olive green that had looked far too dark, but when the decorators had finished, had been lightened with a careful choice of warm cream and gold highlights.

The door handles, light fixtures, everything, were a warm gold. I’d asked the decorators to put just a hint of rose gold in there, just to mellow it out without adding too much pink in there. The effect was warm, and cozy, yet professional at the same time.

Just like me.

Most of the time.

“I thought you said you would never share a room with a man again,” William said, that old teasing air returning .

Of course it did. The man was a menace. Two minutes of sane, rational conversation, and he was at it again.

Reminding me of all we’d had. All we’d lost.

There had been a time when William Parry had been the person in the world who knew me the best.

But it hadn’t lasted. And it could never be repeated.

“Look, if you’ve just come here to repeat the same old arguments,” I said hotly, throwing all caution to the wind, “you can just leave, understand? I’ve had it with gentlemen like you?—”

“Gentlemen like me?” William said softly.

A shiver went up my spine. I hadn’t really noticed just how close he was to me. So close that even though he had spoken in a low voice, I had felt as well as heard his words.

A thrum through my body. A sensual, intimate moment. A sense that we were closer than two people ever had been without actually touching.

I crossed my arms and took a step back.

Tried to take a step back. There was a rather inconvenient wall behind me that I did not remember being there before.

“Look, do I want to kiss you?” William said with liquid eyes. “Yes.”

I tried to speak but it was more a squeak. How dare he! Come here to my home and?—

“But you clearly don’t want to kiss me, and I'm not that kind of cad, Lilah, even if you think I am,” William continued, his gaze flickering to my lips then back to my eyes.

Warmth pooled between my legs again. I knew he wasn’t that kind of cad. But he was a cad who knew what he wanted. And it was me.

And though that shouldn’t delight me, it did .

“So let’s just move past our obvious mutual attraction and?—”

“Mutual?” I managed to laugh in what I hoped was a carefree way. “I think you’ll find?—”

“Lie to yourself all you want, Lilah, but don’t lie to me,” said William softly.

“I know that you would tremble to feel my hands on yours, to feel my fingers trailing along your skin. To please you. To pleasure you. I bet I could make you quiver as you came. I’d wager, before the year is out, I’ll do just that. ”

Breathing was getting increasingly difficult and the walls were coming in, air disappearing in my study until all I could breathe in was William. William’s words. William’s hands?—

“I’ll take that wager, because it’ll never happen,” I said coldly. “I don’t need pleasuring by you.”

Even saying the words shot something dark and hot through my body. Damnit!

William seemed to see the truth within me. “Oh, I can please you, Lilah. And I will.”

I stepped to the side, rather astonished my legs still worked, and shook my head. “What would please me would be a solution to my problems. My club related problems,” I reiterated, seeing a spark in William’s eyes. “And if you can’t solve those?—”

“Well actually, I think I can,” said William quietly, a glint of mischief and intelligence in his eyes. “And you, Lilah, the Dowager Duchess of Rotherwick, are going to pay for those ideas.”

William

“Well actually, I think I can. And you, Lilah, the Dowager Duchess of Rotherwick, are going to pay for those ideas.”

I hadn’t actually intended for those words to come out quite like that.

Domineering. Defiant. Devastating.