Page 34 of The Dark Lord Awakens (Dark Service #1)
Lucien/Beau
W ord spread through the castle like wildfire.
By the time the four-hour mark approached, it seemed every demon in the Dark Citadel had found a reason to be in or near the eastern courtyard.
They lined the surrounding balconies, filled the windows, and crowded the courtyard itself, leaving only a large clear space in the center where Azrael had meticulously marked out a receiving area.
I stood on the main balcony overlooking the courtyard, trying to project calm confidence while internally wondering if I’d hallucinated the entire OpenSesame experience. What if nothing appeared? What if I’d just mobilized the entire castle for nothing?
“One minute remaining, my lord,” Azrael murmured beside me, checking a complicated-looking timepiece that appeared to run on small insects instead of gears.
The crowd below had fallen silent, all eyes fixed on the empty space in the courtyard. The tension was thick enough to cut with a knife—or whatever the demonic equivalent of a knife was. Probably something with more spikes and a name like “Soul-Render” or “Hope-Eviscerator.”
“Thirty seconds,” Azrael announced.
I held my breath. This was it—either the moment I cemented my reputation as an all-powerful dark lord or the beginning of my career as the realm’s biggest disappointment since “Diet Blood” (which I sincerely hoped wasn’t a real product but suspected probably was).
“Ten seconds.”
The crowd began counting down in unison, their voices creating an eerie chorus that echoed through the courtyard.
“Five… four… three… two… one…”
For a heartbeat, nothing happened. My stomach dropped.
Then the air in the courtyard shimmered, like heat rising from pavement on a summer day. A faint blue glow appeared about twenty feet above the ground, expanding rapidly into a swirling portal of light. Through it, I could see what looked like a massive warehouse filled with stacked packages.
The demons gasped collectively. Some fell to their knees. Others made warding gestures. A few simply stood with mouths agape.
Just before the packages began to descend, a familiar blue interface window briefly materialized at the edge of the portal, visible only to me.
[Helpdesk Supreme delivery in progress. Valued customer’s order #DL-001-ER-473 has arrived.
This unit reminds valued customer that appropriate storage of perishable items is recommended for optimal nutritional benefit.
Helpdesk Supreme observes that 94.7% of assembled subjects appear to be experiencing religious awe at standard delivery protocol.
Would you like this unit to enhance the visual effects for maximum impressiveness? ]
I suppressed a smile and whispered, “Just deliver the goods, Supremo. No need for theatrics.”
[Helpdesk Supreme acknowledges customer input. However, this unit’s market research indicates that ruler credibility is enhanced by 73.2% when subjects witness impressive displays of power. Implementing Standard Dark Lord Delivery Enhancement Protocol.]
“Wait, what? No, I didn’t?—”
Before I could finish protesting, the portal’s blue glow intensified dramatically, sending rays of light shooting across the courtyard. The swirling energy began to pulse rhythmically, almost like a heartbeat, and faint whispers in an unknown language echoed from within.
The demons’ reactions shifted from awe to outright worship. Several collapsed face-first onto the ground, while others began chanting my name in fervent prayer.
[Visual enhancement successful. Subject reverence metrics have increased by 82.4%. Helpdesk Supreme recommends maintaining appropriately imperious expression during delivery.]
“I’m going to delete your customer satisfaction protocols,” I muttered under my breath.
[Helpdesk Supreme does not recommend this course of action, as it would violate Section 47.3 of your user agreement. Proceeding with delivery.]
The packages began to descend, but now each one was surrounded by miniature lightning that crackled harmlessly around the boxes.
They didn’t simply float downward—they performed an elaborate choreographed dance, spinning and weaving around each other in perfect synchronization before settling into their designated positions.
The portal remained open as more supplies continued to emerge, creating towers of boxes that should have been physically impossible to balance but somehow remained perfectly stable.
The entire process was silent except for the occasional soft hum of energy from the portal itself and the theatrical thunderclaps that accompanied particularly large deliveries.
“The void provides,” someone whispered reverently behind me, and the phrase was picked up and repeated throughout the crowd. “The void provides!”
I watched in equal parts amazement, relief, and exasperation. It had worked, but Supremo had turned a simple delivery into a religious experience. At this rate, they’d be building shrines to me by nightfall.
“Magnificent,” Azrael breathed beside me, his usual composure cracking to reveal genuine awe. “In all my centuries of service, I have never witnessed such mastery of void manipulation.”
I decided not to correct his misconception that I was personally manifesting all this through sheer magical might. Let him think I was channeling cosmic energies instead of just dealing with an interdimensional shopping assistant with a flair for the dramatic.
[Delivery 27% complete. Would valued customer like to add dramatic music to further enhance the experience?]
“Absolutely not,” I whispered firmly.
[Helpdesk Supreme has already taken the liberty of selecting an appropriate soundtrack. Market research indicates that ominous choral arrangements increase ruler approval ratings by up to 47%.]
Before I could object again, the air filled with the sound of an invisible choir singing in deep, resonant tones that seemed to vibrate through the very stones of the courtyard.
The effect on the demons was immediate and dramatic.
Several of the smaller imps began swaying in rhythm with the music, their eyes glazed over in rapture.
A group of shadow demons melted into puddles of darkness before reforming in more reverent postures.
Even General Smashington, stoic warrior that he was, had closed his eyes and was nodding his massive head in time with the otherworldly melody.
Duke Splashypants raised his webbed hands toward the portal, water streaming from his fingertips as he gurgled something that sounded suspiciously like a hymn.
The droplets froze in midair, forming a glittering constellation that reflected the blue light in dazzling patterns across the courtyard walls.
“All hail the Master of the Void!” someone shouted from the back of the crowd, and the cry was taken up by others until it became a rhythmic chant that somehow harmonized perfectly with the mysterious choir.
I was going to have a very long talk with Supremo about boundaries later.
The packages continued their choreographed descent, the music swelling dramatically with each new wave of supplies.
By the time the final crate settled into place with a perfectly timed musical crescendo, the entire courtyard had been transformed into what looked like an elaborate religious ceremony centered around cardboard boxes and plastic-wrapped pallets.
The portal pulsed once, then collapsed in on itself with a soft pop that somehow managed to sound both mundane and cosmic at the same time. The music faded, leaving behind an expectant silence.
[Delivery complete. Customer satisfaction survey will be available in your account within 24 hours. Helpdesk Supreme reminds valued customer that positive ratings contribute to improved service metrics.]
For a moment, absolute silence reigned. Then, as if on cue, every demon in sight dropped to their knees, foreheads pressed to the ground in the most dramatic display of subservience I’d ever witnessed.
“ALL HAIL THE DARK LORD!” they chanted in unison, the sound reverberating through the castle. “MASTER OF THE VOID! brINGER OF BOUNTY! FULFILLER OF PROPHECY!”
At some point, I should probably find out what this prophecy actually said.
I raised my hands, feeling both ridiculous and strangely powerful. “Rise, my loyal subjects. The bounty of the void awaits.”
As the demons stood, I descended the stairs from the balcony to the courtyard, Azrael following close behind. The crowd parted before me like the Red Sea before Moses, many still bowing or making reverent gestures as I passed.
I approached the nearest stack of supplies—cases of cup noodles in various flavors, their colorful packaging visible through the clear plastic wrapping. The demons watched with bated breath as I examined the mysterious objects from beyond.
“Let us inspect the bounty,” I announced, trying to sound appropriately dark-lordish. “Bring me one of each type of provision.”
Several servants rushed forward, each grabbing different packages and bringing them to a nearby table that someone had hastily set up. Within minutes, I had samples of everything: cup noodles, protein bars, bread, bottled water, hygiene kits, and more.
I picked up a cup of instant ramen—spicy chicken flavor—and held it up for all to see. “This,” I announced, “is a powerful sustenance from the void realms. It contains energies that will restore strength and vitality to even the weakest among us.”
The demons stared at the cup with awe and confusion. I peeled back the lid partway, revealing the dried noodles and seasoning packet inside.
“Behold,” I continued, “the magic is sealed within, preserved until the moment of consumption. It requires only hot water to release its power.”
I gestured to one of the water heaters that had arrived with the supplies. “Bring that forward and fill it with water.”
While servants scrambled to comply, I opened a package of sliced bread. The demons closest to me gasped at the sight of the perfectly uniform, soft white slices.