Page 28 of The Atonement (Arrangement #3)

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

AINSLEY

I ’d finally worked up the courage to color my hair with the box dye I bought at the store.

It felt strange—like staring into the face of a stranger.

I only had nail scissors in my purse, but I knew I had to cut the length, too, so I worked slowly and diligently, chopping off strand by strand until my hair was chin length all the way around.

It was a terrible job—the cut was uneven and the color made me look washed out and lifeless—but it would have to do until I could get into a salon. My phone chimed, and I dashed across the room, opening up my email and staring at it in disbelief.

The subject line alone was enough to take my breath away: Request Denied.

Picking up the phone with trembling hands, I dialed my boss’s number.

I was convinced she wouldn’t answer by the fifth ring, but just as I was prepared to hang up and call the office line, she did.

“Hello?”

“Tina, it’s Ainsley. I just received your email about my request to transfer…”

“Mhm. Look, I’m sorry, Ainsley. As much as I’d hate to lose you, even if I wanted to transfer you, I couldn’t. It’s not up to me. It would have to go through HR, and they say we need you here.”

“Who says? Jenn? She just approved Sara’s transfer when she moved to New Orleans last year. How is this any different?”

“Listen, you’re lucky they didn’t fire you because you still haven’t turned in your forms for leave. I had to fight for that.”

“What? I…could’ve sworn I turned them in.

” I thought back, trying to recall the moment Tina had mentioned them.

Had I been interrupted by Tara before or after that?

Did I truly forget to send in the forms?

How could I be so stupid? “I’m so sorry, Tina.

I don’t know how I managed to forget. I’ll get them turned in today. Will they reconsider then?”

“I’m sorry, Ainsley, but no, I don’t think so.

Tara’s leaving, your branch is barely hanging on by a thread, you still haven’t even looked at the candidates I’ve sent you to fill her position.

I know you’re going through some things, but the bottom line is there was no way I was going to get them to approve a transfer on top of everything else going on.

Denver’s a new market. They want the best of…

They want managers with proven track records. ”

“This is the first time I’ve had any issues. You know that. You know me. I’ve done everything for this company.”

“I’m not arguing any of that, but again , it’s not up to me.”

“Then who is it up to? Who do I need to talk to?”

“Burt Stover.”

“ Who?” I pinched the skin on the inside of my wrist, the pain keeping me focused.

“The new head of HR. He doesn’t know you like Jenn did. If she was still here, maybe she’d reconsider, but it’s just rotten timing. I wish there was more I could do.”

“Tina, please, I need this transfer. I have to have a job when I get out there. It doesn’t even have to be Colorado.

Do they need me somewhere else? Somewhere outside of Nashville?

I’m not picky. I just can’t stay here. But I have kids—two of which are accident-prone teenagers—and my husband’s company is small.

We rely on me to provide our health insurance. ”

She sighed. “Look, I’m not going to sugarcoat this.

They’re not pleased with the fact that you’ve missed two weeks’ worth of work, are trying to move suddenly and rather urgently, and have just drained your accounts after having them with us for years.

One of those things is bad enough, but put them together…

Ainsley, I need you to be honest with me here.

I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s going on. Are you in some sort of trouble?”

“No,” I assured her too quickly. “It’s nothing like that.

” Then, because I felt like I needed some sort of excuse, I added, “My kids are having trouble at school. My daughter specifically.” Tina’s daughter was around Maisy’s age.

If there was anything she’d sympathize with, this was it.

“She’s being bullied, and I’m not going to allow it to continue.

The school isn’t doing anything about it, and I’m done.

I have to get her out of there. But I don’t want to leave this company.

I would think my loyalty would mean something here. ”

“Even if that’s the case, and I can certainly understand it if it is, why would you take the money from your accounts? You know how that looks.”

I tried to think quickly, to piece together any sort of excuse that would make sense. “Because one of the parents we’re having issues with also works for this company. I’m not saying he would do anything, but I just thought it was better to protect ourselves in case things get ugly.”

“What do you mean? Is this something I need to get HR involved in? Do you have reason to believe he’s been looking at your accounts?”

“No. I don’t even know that he realized I work here, but I recognized his name in a meeting we had with the school. It was a precaution. You know me, always prepared.”

She was typing something when she spoke again. “Okay, I’ll talk to Burt about the transfer, see if I can get him to reconsider, but no promises. Just…just get the form put in for your leave.”

“I will. Thank you, Tina.”

“Don’t thank me yet. Talk soon.”

I ended the call, my fingers still shaking.

I’d never considered the fact that I might lose my job or that my transfer request might get denied.

Ever since I’d made the decision to leave, I’d been counting on the assurance that I’d still have a job.

A stable job with insurance in order to take care of my children.

If I didn’t, who was to say Peter might not win sole custody? If he already had a lawyer, he was a step ahead of me anyway.

When my phone buzzed again, I assumed it would be Tina with an update, but my hope was dashed when I saw my mother’s name.

“Hello?”

“Hi, it’s me.”

“Everything okay?”

“Hm? Oh, yes, everything’s fine. Fine. I’m just out running errands, and I picked up a few things for you and the kids. Do you care if I drop them by? Some snacks, and a few games and books to keep them occupied in the hotel and on the flight.”

She must’ve been feeling much guiltier than I realized, because Mom was never the type to just pick something up while she was out. Either that or maybe she’d just realized how distressed I was. Perhaps even terrible mothers had mother’s intuition.

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that.”

“Well, if it’s the last time I’ll be seeing you for a while, I wanted to. Do you want to come by the house later? Or would you rather I bring them to you?”

“Um…I’m not sure. ”

“Well, let me drop them off, then. I’m already out. Where are you staying?”

“I, um…” I looked down. “I’ll just come get them at some point this afternoon.”

“Why won’t you tell me where you are? Is something wrong?”

“It’s not that, it’s just… Things got really heated between Peter and I. And I know what you’re going to say, so please just save it. I don’t want him to know where we are.”

“What happened?”

“It was nothing.” I didn’t mention that I’d spent the night scrubbing his blood from my teeth. “Just a fight. But right now, I’m worried if he finds the kids, he’ll try to take them away from me—”

“Oh, I’m sure he wouldn’t do that.”

“I’m sure there are parts of your marriage with Dad that I don’t know about, just like there are parts of mine you don’t know. Peter can’t find out where I’m staying, and I don’t want him to see me out and try to follow me—”

“Okay, fine, but what does any of that have to do with me?”

“I’m afraid he’ll follow you too, Mom. He came to your house, so obviously he thinks we might be in touch. If he believes you know where I am, if he thinks there’s any chance you could lead him to me, to us, I’m afraid he’ll follow you.”

She laughed. “Don’t be ridiculous, Ainsley. Peter’s not going to follow me. This isn’t a spy mission. ”

“I need you to not come to me right now, Mom. Do you understand? I need you to just trust me. Hear me. Hear what I am saying and respect it.”

“Fine, fine… But I want to get these to you somehow. Should we plan a drop? Maybe we could dress all in black and I’ll sit down on a bench with a briefcase. We could come up with a code word—”

“ Mom! ” I cried, my irritation growing. “Just stop. Please stop making me feel stupid for protecting myself. I appreciate the gesture, but honestly, it’s not necessary. I told you we had everything.”

“You’re taking my grandchildren away without even letting me say goodbye to them. The least you can do is let me give them a gift.”

“It’s not safe,” I warned, my voice a low whisper. Why wasn’t she understanding? Why didn’t she believe me?

“Okay, well, let me have it delivered, then. How could he possibly know to follow a delivery man?”

Releasing an exasperated sigh, I thought it over. “Fine.” I didn’t have the strength to keep finding reasons to say no. “Okay, sure. That should work.”

“Lovely. I’m ready when you are.”

I told her the name of the hotel and the room number, and was relieved when she didn’t criticize the place.

“Excellent.” She clicked her pen. “I’ll drop it off to be delivered in the next hour, so keep an eye out. You’ll be there, right?”

“We’ll be here. And thanks, Mom.” It felt awkward to say.

“You’re welcome. Be sure to tell them it’s from me, not your father.”

“I will.”

Two hours later, someone knocked on the door of the hotel. I held the stun gun in one hand as I approached it with soft steps. I pressed my face to the door, staring out the peephole.

The familiar face waiting for me took a moment to register.

“Matt?” I swung the door open, heat already warming my cheeks. I ran a hand over my hair, smoothing it down. “What on earth are you doing here?”