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Alice

S he got up and opened it to a large gust of wind blowing in some swirling snow and a handsome hockey player looking sheepish.

“Hey, I’m sorry to bother you again. I tried to dig myself out as best I could, but I got stuck in a ditch toward the end of the drive. Besides, the road out there is not plowed. I think I might be snowed in?—”

“Come on in,” she said, pulling the door open farther.

He stomped his boots on the porch before coming in.

“I’m sorry. I’ll try later to get out of your hair,” he said as he hung his coat.

“I don’t mind.”

“I can just hang out in my room. I can watch some game videos up there and try again later,” he said, turning for the stairs.

She took a deep breath.

She could do this. This was part of being a grown-up and getting her life together. They could be here, awkwardly existing in the same cabin, or she could pull up her big-girl pants and deal with the problem head-on.

“That’s silly. You can hang out with me—I mean if you want to, that is, no pressure,” she said as she nervously played with her hoody string.

“Are you sure?” he asked, eyeing her carefully.

“Absolutely, although I do just plan on watching Christmas carols all day, so if that’s not your thing...”

“Christmas carols?” he asked, his interest seeming piqued.

“It’s a family tradition. We watch all the different versions on Christmas Eve,” she said with a soft smile.

“I can get behind that. Which one are you watching now?”

Alice unpaused the TV to reveal the Ghost of Christmas Present taking Scrooge McDuck to Mickey’s little house.

“Shut up... I don’t think I’ve seen this since I was a kid,” he said, not even hiding the excitement in his voice.

A smile stretched across her face. “Care to join me?”

“Let’s do this.” He shook snow out of his hair.

The sight of that made her clench her thighs.

They sat on the couch as she pressed play. She kept sneaking glances at him as he rubbed his hands and blew into them.

“Do you want some blanket?” she asked, holding out her throw.

His eyes met hers, and the air felt electric.

“Sure,” he said, taking its corner.

“Oh my god,” she gasped as his hand grazed her. “Your hands are cold!”

“Yeah, sorry about that. It’s cold out there today,” he said, pulling his hands back.

“I’m sorry I sent you out in that. I guess I didn’t see how much snow we had.”

“Don’t even worry about it. I was supposed to leave. Speaking of that, I need to cancel my flight,” he said as he dug his phone out of his pocket.

While he was dealing with his flight, Alice kept looking at him.

He was so incredibly handsome, and of course, she was so attracted to him. There was nothing wrong with her. She was pretty and, yes, bigger than what society considered beautiful, but she didn’t let that hold her back anywhere else in life—so why should it here?

What was the worst that could happen? He would turn her down, would find her annoying, would think she was too much, too sensitive, too weird.

Taking a deep breath, she pushed away those thoughts. He had kissed her, had left a note saying he liked her, had called her beautiful.

“Hey, Taylor,” she said, surprising herself with how small her own voice sounded.

He set his phone on the table next to him and turned to her with his soft, curious expression she was growing fond of.

“I’m sorry about last night. I think I got in my head and didn’t want to believe... some of the nice things you said about me.”

She still couldn’t bring herself to say them out loud.

He cocked his head. “Why do you think I would lie to you?”

She just shrugged.

He turned to her, but he didn’t close the distance like he had last night, even though she was dying for him, too. All she wanted to do was kiss his handsome face again.

“I know I can often read social situations wrong. I miss cues, and sometimes, the way I intend for things to come out gets all jumbled up. Maybe that’s what happened. So, I’m going to be up front but please know I expect nothing and won’t try anything. I’m a grown man. I can handle it when feelings aren’t returned, and I promise not to make it weird.”

Her heart stopped, and her breath caught in her throat. The only thing she could feel was the faint glimmer of hope her brain was currently trying to stamp out for a million different reasons. But she decided she would believe whatever he said next. Both of them deserved to not be second-guessed.

“I do find you beautiful. I have thought about you so many times since our conversation at the gala. I find you fascinating and...” He paused and licked his lips, and Alice was just about to be set on fire. He cleared his throat. “I’m very attracted to you, but the ball’s in your court now.”

No. Don’t put the ball in my court , she thought frantically. She didn’t know anything about balls or what to do with them... in more than one way.

With a deep breath, she decided to believe him, and it was now or never. And really... What better way to reinvent yourself than a snowed-in tryst with a handsome hockey player?

She wanted to scoot over to his side of the couch and snuggle up. His broad chest looked like it would be the perfect place to rest her head. Their eyes were still connected, and she couldn’t bring herself to break the connection. Maybe she could make first contact.

She licked her lips, just thinking about kissing his. A corner of his mouth quirked up at the sight as he took a deep breath.

He flipped his hand up and rested it on the couch between them, a small encouraging gesture. He wasn’t going to push this, she maybe she should just go for it. If she wanted it, she was going to have to.

Her heart was pounding away in her chest and traced her fingers over his open palm. His rough callouses from years of hockey made her feel safe and protected. But as she slipped her hand into his, he closed his hand around her and made her feel something a bit more than safe. Just this small touch had her aching for him.

Her eyes flitted up to his. The look in his eyes lit her up like the Christmas tree. He was devouring her with his gaze. It felt amazing. She had never felt this desired in her whole life. She leaned close, and he leaned in close but making no further move. It was as if time ceased.

Only the moment ended all too soon by her ringing phone. She was tempted to ignore it, but as the moment ended, so did her courage.

“Are you going to get that?”

All she could do was nod as she grabbed her phone off the table.

She answered it without even looking at who it was. That was a mistake.

“Alice, Mom just told me you aren’t coming home for Christmas. Is there anyway you can get out of it?”

“Ummm... I’m sorry,” she said, not knowing what else to say.

The whiplash of emotions was momentarily frying her brain.

Taylor moved away from her, giving her space.

“I just can’t believe you’re not going to be here. The girls will be so sad. What is they have you doing on Christmas?”

“Well, you know, I’ve just been here a few months.” She lied through her teeth. “It’s all a seniority game.”

“I just don’t see why, in this day and age, you couldn’t do whatever you’re doing remotely.”

“I’m kind of busy right now, Isabelle. I’m sorry I can’t make it home. Is there something else you needed?”

“No, I’m just going to miss you.”

“I’ll miss you guys, too.”

“Okay, well, I’m going. Mom and Dad just got here a little bit ago. We’ll talk when you are back in town. I’ll be in Glendale around New Year’s because the girls are staying with Mom and Dad for a few weeks while I’m away on a business trip. We’ll have to get together.”

“Sounds good,” she said, sitting up straight, trying not to feel like too much of a bad sister.

They said their goodbyes and hung up.

She peered at Taylor. “That was my sister.”

He nodded.

“She just found out I’m not coming home for Christmas.”

“I see,” he said without an ounce of judgment.

She found it oddly soothing.

“She’s been pushing for me to move to the city and work for her... but that will not be happening.”

“You wouldn’t want to work for your sister?”

“God, no.”

Taylor laughed, and it settled deep in her soul.

“She’s so successful... and I clearly am not. She likes to think she knows what’s best for me sometimes. Sometimes, I feel like she doesn’t even know me.”

“Why do you feel that way?”

“I don’t know. I mean, how can she know who I am when I don’t even really know who I am?” she said with a rough chuckle. She had never voiced it like that before, but once she said it, it did make sense. “She has always known what she wants. She makes a plan and goes after it. She’d been trying to help me be more like her since we were little, but I just can’t seem to do it. I spend so much time pretending to be something I’m not, and somewhere along the line... maybe I lost sight of who I am... I don’t know. That’s dumb. I’m sure it doesn’t make any sense.”

“No, it makes total sense.”

She looked at him, her bottom lip trapped between her teeth. She picked up her coffee more for something to do than actual thirst.

That call had left her feeling lost. That was all part of why she needed this time away.

Taylor seemed to be watching her. How was someone who seemed so far out of her league made her feel so comfortable?

He smiled, and it warmed her heart.

Maybe it wasn’t so bad after all.