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Alice

I t had been a week since lunch with her dad at the cafe. While she didn’t plan on actually moving in with Taylor for a while, she had spent every night as his place. When he was busy skating, she was busy in her studio, making art. The stress of trying to be someone she wasn’t lessening every day.

She had finished her first author commission, and when her art was shared, her following on her page skyrocketed. Taylor’s personal assistant had offered to take her on as well. So, they had one person who helped to keep their lives running so she could focus on her art, and he, on the ice.

It felt like a privilege to her, but it was something she needed. She had more work lined up, and her personal assistant was helping her set up an online store.

All this progress in one week was surprising, as she didn’t even know what her life would look like in three months because, three months ago, she was hiding in a cabin. It changed from that scared woman, trying to be what everyone thought she should be, to falling in love and trying to figure out who she truly was. There was only one more thing she needed to take care of.

“Alice, I didn’t think you were going to be in today?” Sasha said as she looked up from her desk.

“Yeah, I was hoping we could talk.”

“Of course, come in,” Sasha said as she gestured to the chair across from her.

Alice took a deep breath.

This decision was right for her, but the people pleaser ran deep. Never did she want to let anyone down, let alone someone who had been as kind to her as Sasha had been.

“I wanted to talk to you about something,” Alice said.

Sasha gave her a knowing smile.

“I have loved working with you, but I think, at the end of the season, I’m going to move on.”

There, she’d said it. She glanced at Sasha’s face, thinking she would find anger, but all she saw was her kind smile.

“I kind of saw that coming. I can tell your heart is with your art.”

Alice bit her bottom lip, nodding.

“Are you sure you want to stay on for the rest of the season?”

“Yeah, I do like it, and I like sitting in the press box during home games. It’s nice to watch Taylor.”

“I know the feeling. I was actually going to ask you. If I gave you a photo of Conner and I, could you draw it? I’d love to include it in some of the wedding stuff. I will pay you for it.”

“Yeah, though don’t pay me. Consider this one a gift.”

“Are you sure?” Sasha asked.

“Yeah, thank you for being the best boss I’ve ever had... even if it’s only been a couple months.”

“Of course. I do hope that we can be friends. I think you’ll fit in with all of us,” Sasha said before standing up and pulling Alice into a hug.

“Thank you, that means a lot,” she said.

After leaving the center, Alice was standing in front of Taylor’s door. It felt weird knocking, but it also felt weird just walking in. She raised her fist to knock but decided to just use the key he’d given her and walk in like he’d told her.

Taylor was playing Monsters of the Realm. That felt right. She stopped in her studio to pick up her tablet and joined him on the couch. On the other end, she propped her feet up on his lap and pulled up the drawing she’d been working on.

Once Taylor got to a stopping point, he put down the control, picked up her foot, and rubbed it. “How’d it go?”

“Good, I told her I’d help for the rest of the season, but after that, I was done.”

“I’m proud of you,” he said, moving his hand up to massage her calf.

“I’m not sure anyone has ever been proud of me for quitting a job.” She chuckled.

“I’m proud that you stayed true to yourself and did something hard. I know disappointing people is hard for you. Don’t blow it off. I’m proud of you.”

How was this man so perfect? What had she ever done to deserve him? While she didn’t know the answer to that question, she would spend the rest of her life working to deserve his love and loving him right back.

He picked up the controller and got back to his game as Alice started sketching. “I was thinking about heading to my place later to bring over some more clothes... maybe filling up the side of the closet you cleared out for me.”

“Okay,” he said, eyes on the screen. “After we finish up here, let’s go get some dinner and then we can both stop by your place later.”

“That sounds perfect.”

It did sound perfect. Most of her future with him felt perfect. While New Year, New Me had not gone the way she thought it would, it went better than she could have ever imagined. She was a “New Me,” and for the first time in her life, she was finding out who she truly was. She still had a long way to go on that journey.

Giving herself grace and truly believing she was enough and trying hard enough were still a work in progress, but she was getting closer every day. Each time she voiced a need and wasn’t told she was asking too much, she trusted herself more. Each time she allowed another person to help her, she realized she was worthy of that help. And every time she was told by a stranger on the internet her art spoke to them, she tried to soak up their words, no matter how uncomfortable it made her.

Someday, she would voice her needs and ask for help without believing she was a burden. Someday, she would believe the kind words of others easily because she already believed them about herself.

She wasn’t there yet, but she was on her way, and for now, that was enough.

As Taylor played his game, she watched. The crease that always settled deep between his eyebrows when he was concentrating made her smile. She put down her project and pulled out the sketchbook she kept on her side of the couch and sketched her handsome boyfriend. This notebook was full of him. Him on this couch, in the bed, on the ice. He was her favorite thing to draw.

When he glanced at her, he caught her studying him. While in the past, she might have been embarrassed and turned away, this time, she just smiled. He smiled right back.

“I love you.”

She said it is as easily as breathing.

“I love you, too,” he said with a wink.

He turned back to his game, and she turned back to her sketch. While this moment was so incredibly ordinary, the love she felt was not. Neither was the life they were creating. What was happening was truly extraordinary but made up of ordinary moments just like this. She couldn’t wait to find out what was next for them because she was sure it would be extraordinary. How could it not be?