Page 34 of Secrets That Bind Us

Dean

Present Day

For two whole weeks I keep my distance– watching over them from afar.

When I have a morning shift, I stop by the middle school and greet the little puberty-ridden sassholes.

Some of them I know because I coached when they were younger.

I always make sure to step behind the pillar when Verity drops Savannah, my daughter , off.

She keeps her headphones on, uses a crossover bag like her Mama used to, and keeps her head down.

She’s all Verity in so many ways I recognize.

Savannah doesn’t talk to anyone really– just sketches in her notebook until the bell rings.

At lunch time, I swing by the elementary school and watch as Noah, who dresses slightly better than most students here, is a social butterfly– flitting from table to table to talk to whoever calls his name.

There is never not a smile on his face, and he reminds me of me in that aspect when I was younger. Not Micah.

Savannah and Noah are complete polar opposites. I hope to God Savannah's only moodier due to puberty, and not because Micah ever made her feel less than his. I pray he never showed favoritism and loved them equally.

Like I will be doing.

Following Verity, on the other hand, is a bit harder on me to stay inconspicuous.

If she’s not holed up at her house, she’s in town working and talking to Will.

Laughing with Will. Leaning too close to look at blueprints over a table with Will.

I know he’s married. I know he has two kids with Evelyn.

I know they run a business together– but I don’t like it.

I make sure to pull Will over when he leaves for the day and have a small talk with him.

He throws his head back and laughs. “Jesus, you still got it bad for her, huh?” He speeds away.

Jason finally makes me spill my vitriol during our run, and I tell him everything .

“And you’re sure she’s yours?” he questions, panting as we run the trail of the community park that leads through the woods and out to the high school practice field. The man can lift, but when it comes to running, he loathes it.

“The second I looked into those blue eyes, I knew she was mine, Jace. Black hair, freckles, my cheek bones. She’s kinda tall, too, for a twelve-year-old.

Only thing that ain’t mine is her nose. That’s all Verity.

” I pant out, because fuck cardio. The only cardio I want is five-foot-three with brown hair, big brown eyes, and is the mother of my children.

But I’ll get there soon. Also- anyone that says Noah ain’t mine is getting a swift fucking fist to the throat.

“But she said you get to meet her properly?”

I nod, spitting on the ground as we keep running in the blistering sun.

Fuck, this heat wave is suffocating. It rained a few days ago but that sticky humidity remained.

Whose idea was this? I grimace when I remember it was mine.

“Told her there was no getting rid of me now.” Then I tell him how she flirted in that little way of hers that always makes my heart flicker and my dick throb .

Verity gives my heart an erection. A heart-on, if you will.

To this, Jason laughs, swiping at the sweat in his eyes. “So the wolf finally caught the rabbit, huh? Well, I’m happy for you. How do you feel, though?”

“Angry, at first. Mostly at myself.”

“And now?”

“I'm just… ready. When it comes to Verity, I promised her forever at seventeen, and I meant it. Now it’s just time for her to realize I did. I’m not a boy anymore. Thank God she wasn’t around to see the worst parts of me.”

Jason stops running, so I do, too. Throwing his arms up and clutching the back of his head, he lets out an exasperated breath, squinting.

“There were no ‘worse parts of you,’ Dean. Stupid, sure. Horny, of course. Stupid and horny, absolutely. But you were always a good man. You just needed a push. And now she gets the man you molded yourself to be. You’re you. You’re just a better version of you.”

“She lost her accent, man.” I reply with a sad shake of my head. I don’t know why that fucking guts me, but it does. “She’s got this… I dunno how to explain it other than it’s a different cadence to her words. Like she worked really hard to forget she ever lived here.” Forget me, I don’t say.

Jace hums. “She’ll come back to you. She’s still in there.

May be a little different, but…” He lifts a sweaty shoulder and lets it drop.

“You know, Maranda says sometimes women ‘lose their pink.’ It takes a good man – not a nice man – to bring it back. Slowly but surely. Maybe her accent comes back. Maybe it doesn’t.

But the girl that loved you is still in there either way. ”

I grunt as we start running again, and we come to another stop at a clearing and sit on some boulders just inside the shade– taking in the nature sounds late summer in Adelaide has to offer.

“I’m guessin’ you’re just waiting for her to hit you up now?”

I dip my chin. “I left my card with my phone number on the crack of her door and another in her mailbox,” I pause, because I’m not proud of this next part, “and another on her windshield under the wiper.”

Chief laughs. “Damn, you leave one on her side porch too?”

I let out a groan because yes. Yes, I fucking did. Jace cackles. “I also called Zoey and asked for Verity’s number to have just in case. I had to promise her I’m not gonna use it and I’m not.”

“Not yet.” Jason counters.

“I just don’t want to accidentally avoid the call or text because it’s an unknown number.”

He barks out another laugh at my expense and I’m really starting to regret ever making him my friend. “And she still hasn’t called? Man, that’s gotta be burning a hole in your pocket.”

“You're not helping me feel better, you know? Where’s my all-knowing, all-seeing guru with the old-town wisdom?”

“Look, if I can't fuck with you, we can’t be friends.”

I roll my eyes, leaning forward to sit my elbows on my knees.

“I just want to get to know them. I mean, Noah sees me at his school and says hello, but he's a social little thing. I don’t think the kid’s ever met a stranger he didn’t like.

Savvy reminds me so much of Verity when we were young.

Hunched over a sketchbook, totally unimpressed with the people around her. ”

“You know, River is in Savannah's grade. Always talks about how quiet she is. Says the other kids call her weird.”

“You telling me they’re bullying my kid?”

Jason's eyes go wide. “What? Christ, no. He makes them shut up. Goes with her to the library. Kind of watches over her. I raised that boy right. Well, his mother did. I mostly told them to do what their Mama said and not to pout… and then bought them some age-appropriate motorbikes so I could take them away and give her a well-deserved break every once in a while.”

I blink at him, all of that sounding a bit too familiar. “Sounds like we're gonna be in-laws.” I groan.

He nods once. “Just might. If you can convince Ver to stay.”

I shake my wrist to look at my watch. “Verity was never small town , Chief. She was always meant for greater things. I saw it then; I see it now. I’ll never hold her back. I’ll never force her to be anywhere she doesn’t want to be.”

Jason clears his throat. “You know, my dad was the one who walked into that house one too many times back then…” he shakes his head and looks towards the clearing. “It wasn’t right that Richard kept getting off scotch-free.”

“That wasn’t my dad’s fault. Richard knew powerful people. Not just in Adelaide.”

“Maranda’s dad was like that.” He says softly.

“When I met her during college, I was dating someone else at the time but Maranda was this… force I didn’t see coming.

I took one look at her and just knew she was the one for me.

I broke up with my girlfriend that night and started pursuing her.

I don’t why. I just did. She was this great thing, the quiet in the loud.

But then she allowed me to see all these really great little pieces of her and I was hooked .

But I also almost lost her due to my stupidity and well, just being young and reckless.

“Even though I knew what I had in my hands, it was like, I felt like I didn’t deserve it.

And when I almost lost her, it set me straight.

I had to work hard to be a man she could be proud of walking this life beside her.

I had to learn how to love her as a man and not a hormone-rage-fueled boy because the last thing she wanted- was to marry someone like her father. So I did the work. Same as you.”

We stay quiet for a few beats, listening to the sounds of a dying summer soundtrack.

“Here comes that wisdom.”

I dip my chin. “I’m ready.”

“Women like my wife, like Verity… are too headstrong and resilient sometimes because they’ve been forced to be.

They don’t know another way– even when life becomes a little easier.

She’s gonna need you there to be a little stronger than she is.

She’s not gonna know what to do when you do show up for her.

Don’t make it a big deal. Show up. Every time.

In any capacity. And don’t leave when she makes a big show of not needing you.

She needs you. She may think she’s got a handle on things, but buddy, even when she does, it’s nothing but chaos in her mind. ”

“I already knew that Jace. That’s the whole fuckin’ thing. I want to be the one she leans on, man. I know she can handle it. I just want the chance to prove that she doesn’t have to. I want to be a husband – her husband – and a father to our kids.”

He lifts a brow, acknowledging it. “Kids, huh?”

I nod again.

He makes a show of dusting his hands and letting it go by putting his hands up. “Then my work here is done. Student has surpassed the teacher and whatnot.”

I laugh.

“So, can River take Savannah to Homecoming?”

“You got a problem with me cleaning a rifle in front of your son?”