Page 46 of Scrap Metal & Love Reforged

So much more than it should. It was ridiculous that just months ago, I’d had no desire to get close to anyone, and now, Iwas crushed. Knowing Seth had transformed me into some sort of weepy romance heroine.

“Are you sure?” Skye asked. “I mean, they’re our parents, and—”

“And I just don’t want to tell them right now,” I said.

Because I’dseenwhat they were like after Lance died. I’d seen how devastated they were. And that wasn’t even taking into account the fact that I had no idea how my parents might react to me being gay. They’d tossed around quite a few homophobic jokes when I was a kid, and my dad was the most hyper-masculine guy ever.

But I hadn’t seen them in years. Something might’ve changed, but I couldn’t know for sure. And Skye was… more dependable than them, more accepting and safer. And I hadn’t been entirely sure about even telling her. Even now, I still felt a cold, creeping sense of dread that she was really upset about this and just not showing it.

“Promise you won’t tell them,” I said. “This is something I want to tell them myself.”

Skye tilted her head away and slowly stood. “Okay,” she said. “I won’t say a word. I promise. You can stay with me as long as you want, and no one has to…has to know why exactly.”

“Thank you,” I replied.

Skye smiled. “It might not be so bad having you around. You can help me with Jess, while we’re looking around for another apartment.”

That was like her, looking on the bright side, even with things like this. “Yeah,” I replied. “It’ll be great.”

Maybe the apartment search would be good for me. A distraction from my broken heart and the stupid, stubborn crush I still had on Seth. This was my fault, really, as much as it was his. Sure, Seth had lied, but I’d been the fool who fell head overheels in love with him, trusting him. I never should’ve let my guard down like that. Then, everything would’ve been fine.

But it wasn’t fine. My chest was tight, and a darker thought crept in: maybe it would never be okay again. Right now, it sure felt that way.

Chapter Eighteen

Seth

The best thing about Brandon was that he was genuinely kind and an exceptional friend. Most people probably would’ve let me hang out to dry after what I’d done, but Brandon wasn’t one of them. I’d sent him a single text, “I really screwed up,”and Brandon announced that he was on his way.

I threw myself over the sofa and waited. Why didadmittingI'd screwed up make it all feel worse? And sure, this wouldn’t be my first botched relationship, but usually my break-ups were amicable. Or if not, it was usually that we just didn’t work, and as an adult, I knew that happened sometimes. There was no denying whose fault it was this time, though.

A knock sounded on my apartment door, and wincing, I rose from the sofa and crossed the kitchen floor. I threw open the door and Brandon greeted me. His arms were crossed, his mouth fixed in that familiarI-told-you-solook. I hadn’t expected Alex to be with him; he had the grace to look something akin to sympathetic. “Hey, guys,” I said.

“Hey, Seth,” Alex said, stepping into my apartment without hesitating.

Brandon gave me a nod and closed the door behind him. I felt suddenly like a misbehaving child, and in truth, I probably deserved that.

Alex settled onto the sofa, and Brandon sat. They looked for all the world like disappointed parents waiting to deliver a lecture. I sat in the chair near them and swallowed hard. “Okay, I know what you’re going to say. I caused this. I messed up. And you told me so,” I said.

“Well done,” Brandon said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “For God’s sake, Seth! I know you thrive on drama, but a secret alter ego? With Troy?”

“It wasn’t about drama,” I said. “I just didn't know when to tell him. I didn’t want to ruin things, and I told you that.”

Brandon sighed and ran his hands through his hair. “I don’t know what to tell you.”

I leaned back in the chair and nodded. “Well, I ought to make it up to him, right? Make things right, so he’ll forgive me. I can pull out all the stops. You know. Go really overboard.”

“Seth,” Alex said.

I tilted my head, meeting his gaze. Alex smiled sadly. “It doesn’t always work that way. Sometimes, you upset people, and you can’t make things right, at all. I think this is something that you’re going to have to sit back and wait for. Maybe it’ll fix itself out. Maybe it won’t.”

“But I can’t just sit here and donothing. What will that solve?” I said. “There has to besomethingI can do. Maybe I can get him a new apartment or something. I can help him out with money, or something like that. I—”

“Money? You can’t buy forgiveness,” Alex said. “Didn't work with him before, did it? Trust me; I understand the power of money, but it doesn’t work miracles.”

“I agree,” Brandon said.

As ifhehadn’t once been ridiculously rich and tried to fix all his problems with money. I idly kicked at the leg of the sofa. “Deep-down, I think I know that I can’t solve this thing with money, but I don’t know what else to do. I’ve never…I mean, I’ve had break-ups before, but I’ve never really had one that I felt so awful about.”