Page 33 of Saving Tracey (Finding Hope #1)

Chapter Seventeen

TRACEY

I shot upright when a piercing scream slipped past my subconscious mind, and for once, it wasn’t mine. Trevor shot into an up as well, and he grabbed Lucas immediately, who was screaming and crying in his sleep.

My heart broke in my chest.

"Luc, kiddo, wake up.” Trevor shook him gently, holding his little brother close to him.

Lucas's eyes flashed open, and he instantly clung to Trevor, tears pouring down his terror-stricken face. My heart reached out for the little boy. He looked so lost and terrified. His bottom lip quivered as he tried to calm himself down, but the tears wouldn’t stop streaking down his cheeks like an endless waterfall.

Trevor rocked him, shh ing him and whispering comforting words into his ears, reminding him that he was no longer with the monsters and that he was safe.

I slid out of bed, and Trevor watched me with questioning eyes, but I just held up a finger to him. I snatched on a pair of his sweats and ran out of the room, dashing down the stairs to the kitchen. I met Glenda and Dale at the bottom of the stairs.

"Is he okay?" Worry was clear in Glenda’s voice. She looked behind me up the stairs, where Trevor was still consoling his little brother.

I nodded. "Trevor has him,” I assured her. “I was just going to get him some milk from the fridge."

She nodded, and her eyes flickered down to my arms. I mentally cursed myself for being stupid enough to leave my arms bare.

She didn't say anything about them, though.

She just gave me a small smile and stepped aside, allowing me to slip past her and Dale.

I continued to the kitchen and yanked open the fridge, desperate to get back into Trevor's room, where my scars were safe from prying eyes.

When I got back up to Trevor’s room, Lucas was mostly calm—still crying silently, but calm, nonetheless.

Trevor was talking to him about the monsters in his dreams. I handed the glass of milk to Trevor, who shot me a grateful smile before turning his attention back to his little brother.

"Hey, Luc, look what Trace got you," Trevor told him, his tone soft.

Lucas looked at the glass of milk in Trevor’s hand and sent me a small smile, but he looked absolutely terrified to take the cup.

I slid on the bed beside them and held out my arms to Lucas.

Trevor's eyes widened at my gesture, knowing I hadn't gotten used to Lucas yet, but I kept my eyes trained on Lucas, an encouraging smile on my face.

He slid onto my lap without hesitation, snuggling against my chest. I wrapped my arm around him and placed the glass of milk in his small hands. "Hey, Luc?" I whispered, making him look up at me.

"Yeah?" He wrapped his small hands around the glass.

"You don't have to be afraid anymore.” Those troubled eyes, the same exact dark color as Trevor’s, stared right back at me.

God, they looked so alike .

"You promise?"

I nodded. "I promise, Luc. We won't let anyone else hurt you ever again."

He nodded, snuggling back against my chest and sipping on his glass of milk. I let my eyes meet Trevor's over Lucas's head. He leaned over and kissed my forehead. "I love you," Trevor murmured, his voice filled with so much emotion, it made my chest swell.

I sent him a small smile. "And I love you,” I told him softly.

A few hours later, I was sitting in the living room with Trevor, Paul, and Lucas.

Paul and Lucas were currently playing Call of Duty , and Trevor and I were cuddling on the couch.

I was between the armrest and Trevor’s body, and I was curled up against Trevor’s side under a blanket with his arm wrapped tightly around me.

Trevor was busy throwing remarks to Paul about his way of playing, making Lucas laugh hysterically to the point that he could barely press the buttons on his controller.

Dale and Glenda came into the living room, drawing my and Trevor’s attention to them. Paul and Lucas were too engrossed in their game to realize we all had company.

"I just got off the phone with Angelina," Dale spoke up.

Trevor sat up straighter at that news, and I looked between him and Dale, feeling slightly panicked. What was wrong? Why was Dale talking to Angelina? Was something wrong? Did something happen?

What the fuck was going on ?

"What did she say?" Trevor asked, his hand grabbing mine and squeezing gently, instantly settling my nerves a little bit.

He rubbed soothing circles on the back of my hand with his thumb.

"She wants to have dinner with all of us—just you, me, Tracey, Glenda, and herself.

She wants to be absolutely sure that this has nothing to do with Kaleb's behavior lately.

I told her we agreed to dinner tonight. We're meeting at the French restaurant on the other side of town at six, so be ready. "

"Wait.” I put my hand up. My head was spinning from the sudden bit of information. "What's going on?" I looked up at Trevor so that my eyes met his.

Trevor ran his fingers through his hair. "While your dad is still out on the loose, I want you to move in with me here."

I gaped at him. I hadn't actually thought he meant what he said yesterday! I hated that I was always twisting Trevor's life around. First, I ruined his friendship with Kaleb, and now, I was going to be moving in with him?

I would be fine at Miss Brinson's. I didn't want Trevor doing more for me than he already had.

Besides, I didn't want my dad coming around here. He was insane, and he would hurt anyone in his path to get to me. I knew that. I couldn't let Trevor or any of his family get hurt—especially not Lucas.

I shook my head at him. "Trevor, I can't let you do this," I told him quietly, my eyes pleading with him to understand. "You've already changed so much in your life because of me, and now you're going to be putting yourself and your family in danger."

He put a finger over my lips, shaking his head at me.

"This isn't up for discussion, baby." I narrowed my eyes at him.

"I love you, and I will do anything in my power to protect you. I need you to understand that. You’re everything to me.

Dale and Glenda understand my need to have you as close to me as possible, and that's why they've agreed with me about you moving in. "

Tears filled my eyes. For seventeen years of my life, I had wanted nothing more than for someone to love me unconditionally and to protect me from all of the bad shit in my life. Now that Trevor was in front of me, loving me and protecting me, I didn't know what to do about it all.

I just knew that I didn’t want him or his family to suffer because of my own fucked up life.

Trevor pulled me into his arms. "Baby girl, I will protect you to the end of our days, I promise. I love you,” he stressed.

“Please, just go to this dinner and talk to Kaleb's mom about this.

I need you here with me, baby girl. I need to be able to wake up in the middle of the night and see you beside me, knowing that you're okay. "

I nodded, swiping at my cheeks to rid my face of the tears. He leaned forward and kissed me, not giving a shit about Dale and Glenda still being in the room. My cheeks heated crimson. He looked up at them when he pulled back from me. "We'll be ready to go by five-thirty."

Dale nodded, and he and Glenda stepped back out of the living room. I leaned back into Trevor's side, and he immediately wrapped an arm around my shoulders, holding me against him.

It always blew my mind how amazing Trevor was to me. He had been through so much shit in his life; he had a past that he hadn't even told me about yet, but he was still so strong.

I could only hope to be half as strong as he was one day.

After everything he had been through in life, he still came out on top. He didn't have suicidal thoughts, and he didn't have nightmares. He could think about his parents without having a panic attack.

Trevor loved so freely. He gave and gave, and he never asked for anything in return.

He loved me with all of his heart, always ready to make me happy, and to take care of me.

When he met his brother for the first time, he instantly grew attached to him and wanted to do nothing more than protect him.

Trevor was messed up in his own ways, but he was the greatest guy I had ever known, and I knew I would never meet anyone greater than him.

"What are you thinking about, baby?" Trevor asked me softly, kissing the top of my head.

And he knew me so fucking well. He knew when I was thinking, and he knew when I was depressed. He knew when I needed a hug, and when I needed to be alone.

I looked up at him, giving him a small smile. "I'm thinking about how great of a guy you are, and how lucky I am to have you.”

He grinned, leaning down to kiss me, his hand cupping my cheek.

I wrapped my hand around his wrist until he pulled back, placing a chaste kiss on the tip of my nose, making me blush.

"While we're talking about luckiness," he murmured, brushing his thumb over my cheekbone, "you’ve made me the luckiest guy on the planet.

I never thought that I would have a chance with you, yet you let me close to you.

You make me feel okay again. I haven't felt depressed since the first moment I held you in my arms on that bathroom floor after making you throw up those pills.

You're so caring, Tracey, and I love that about you.

You're terrified of so much, yet you don't hesitate to comfort me or Lucas when we need it. "

I gave him a small smile, not knowing what to say. Trevor had a habit of leaving me speechless.

I twisted my fingers in my lap as I sat between Trevor and Dale at the table, Miss Brinson and Glenda on the other side of the table, Miss Brinson situated right across from me.

I was nervous, to say the least. I was being selfish. Kaleb's mom had bent over backward to provide for me and make me welcome into her home, and yet I was just running away from all that she had offered me.

"Tracey," Angelina said gently, making my eyes snap up to meet hers, “is this what you really want?"

I wanted to be by Trevor's side. He made me feel safe and protected, and I felt like nothing would happen to me with him constantly there by my side. It didn’t mean that I didn’t feel safe at her home, because I did, but there was just a kind of security I got being around Trevor that I couldn’t find anywhere else.

I nodded, swallowing nervously. Hurt flickered across her expression for a quick second, but she quickly smothered it. I hated seeing that hurt look cross her eyes. I knew she loved me as one of her own children, and I hated doing this to her.

"Did Kaleb scare you that much, sweetie?"

I shook my head, opening my mouth to tell her that my dad was out of prison, but I couldn't bring myself to say it. My throat closed up. I looked at Trevor, panicked.

He wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close to him, and kissed the top of my head before he spoke.

He looked up at Miss Brinson. "Her dad was released from prison, as you know, and she's terrified, to say the least." Miss Brinson nodded in understanding.

"I know you love her and want to protect her, but—“

She cut him off, offering him a small smile.

"You don't have to say anymore, Trevor. I understand.” We were both shocked.

“You and Tracey have had a bond that has been unbreakable since the first time you two played Call of Duty together in my living room.

You have had eyes for her—and only her— since you met her.

I want her safe, and I want her to be loved unconditionally.

She deserves that after the hell she has suffered through.

I just need to know that she's going to be protected and that you promise to love her and take care of her.

If you can promise me that, then she can move. "

Trevor nodded his head at her instantly. "Over my dead body will anyone touch her again."

She nodded, smiling at me. "Tracey, just remember, you are still one of my children, and you are welcome to come home anytime you want, okay?" Her smile was warm and genuine. My chest swelled.

I nodded, my throat closing up, my eyes filling with tears. She stood up and came around the table, her arms open for a hug. I got up also—and surprising not only myself, but her as well—I launched myself into her arms, hugging her tightly, letting a tear fall down my face.

All my life, I had just wanted a mother that loved me enough to do what was best for me, to love me unconditionally, and to put my needs before her own.

I finally had it.

My mom wasn't the woman currently sitting behind bars that let my asshole of a father beat me and rape me. My mom wasn't the woman who kept me in that situation all of my life.

My mom was the woman currently holding me in her arms, shh ing me and telling me that I was going to be okay.

My mom was the woman that gave me a better life and let me know that I was capable of obtaining happiness.

She released me, kissing my cheek. "I am always just a phone call away, Tracey. And you call me anytime day or night if you need anything. And remember, you have a key to the house; you’re one of my kids—you never have to knock, sweetheart.”

I nodded at her, tears rushing down my cheeks as I smiled.

She gave me one more final hug before she turned and walked out of the restaurant.

Trevor placed his hand on my lower back, and I slowly turned to face him when Angelina disappeared from my view.

"Are you alright, baby?" He wiped some tears off my cheeks.

I nodded, giving him a small, watery smile, my throat still thick with emotions and tears. "I've got a mom," I whispered.

He smiled at me, pulling me into his arms. "Yes, baby, you do, and she will never give up on you."

I circled my arms around his waist, burrowing my face into his chest.

I was going to move on. I had people that cared about me. I had a real mom. I had a family that loved me. I had Trevor to stand beside me and hold my hand through all of my tough times.

I was going to be stronger than this. It would take time, but I would no longer allow my father to ruin my life any further.