Page 14 of Ringmaster (The Kingdom of Shadow & Bone #1)

Mercy

Warm rays of sunshine beam down on us as we exchange a week’s worth of secrets we’ve each been hanging on to.

Miriam scoops a handful of salty seawater and dribbles it over her arms to cool off.

I do the same, relishing in the sensation of each drop carving its own path.

I repeat the process, seeking relief from the relentless sun.

“I can’t believe how hot it is already,” Miriam complains. “It’s going to be a miserable season. We barely even had spring.”

I sigh. “You’re right. It went right from rainy to miserable, but at least we have a great view.” I point at the shirtless men unloading the ships.

The docks are bustling and busy, which makes for good people-watching today.

The muscular workers move swiftly, unloading large boats filled with spices and luxurious fabrics.

Each man has a purpose and a job to do. They move as one, and it’s mesmerizing to watch—their tan, tattooed bodies, hardened and rippling in the sunshine from years of service on the trade routes.

Many of them have been working on the boats from the time they were sixteen, the same as Tavien.

Miriam cracks a smile. “You’ve always enjoyed that particular view?”

I roll my eyes. “Are you complaining?”

“Who, me?” she quips. “Never.”

I snicker. “Where were we?”

Miriam pretends to think. “You were just about to tell me something interesting.”

I laugh. “Oh, was I? I think you’ve got some confessions of your own to make.”

Waiting for my cousin’s response, and feeling relaxed, I let the tide lap over my skin, grounding my body as one with the sea.

If I stayed long enough, I wonder if it would claim me.

We’ve waded in up to our knees with our dresses gathered in our hands to keep from soaking them.

Our skin glows—healthy and sun-kissed already.

Hers from working in the markets. Mine from tending the garden and small orchard of fruit trees—gifts from my uncle, the wealthy merchant trying to care for my mother through it all.

Not just out of duty to his only living family, but because he truly cherishes her.

The same way I do. I hardly know the man, but this alone makes me feel close to him.

When she doesn’t answer after a few minutes of silence, I casually ask, “Is he on this run?” I’m hoping for an update on her secret courtship.

Miriam lights up at the mention of her secret lover. “Kaelric left on yesterday’s boat and won’t be back for a while. They’re sailing east.”

I arch a brow in surprise. “And you weren’t going to tell me if the two of you finally—you know?”

She blushes. “I’ve been carefully taking the supplement since my first blood. But Kaelric says he won’t touch me until we’re properly engaged.”

“Isn’t the eastern trade route dangerous? He didn’t want to—not even before he left?”

Miriam bites her bottom lip, and I instantly feel bad. I didn’t mean to make her worry.

“It’s mostly just sea beasts and sirens, according to him. He’s grown up along the eastern trade route, so I guess it doesn’t really bother him.”

I nod, relieved it’s not as dangerous as I’ve heard. “That’s good. But if you two get married, would you ever consider going with him?”

“Absolutely not. I’d stay here. I wouldn’t feel comfortable staying in his home or with his family. His father is a Lord. Mine’s a merchant. I wouldn’t want to embarrass myself,” she confesses.

I always forget Kaelric’s family owns an armada of ships.

His father is a very wealthy Lord in a far-off land.

This trade route is his to run—a gift from his father on his twenty-second birthday.

Each of his four children divides the routes between their fleets to continue the family business.

Kaelric is the youngest of the brothers, and even though he’s not in line for a title, their union will benefit my uncle greatly—which makes it hard to understand why Kaelric is afraid to ask for Miriam’s hand.

She interrupts my thoughts. “What about you, Mercy?” she asks. “Would you run away to the circus? Would you leave all this behind?”

My mouth drops open in surprise, and she giggles uncontrollably, laughing until tears fill her eyes. It earns us a puzzled look from Tavien. She waves, and he goes back to skipping rocks.

I splash my way closer to Miriam, dropping my voice low as I whisper, “I wish I could run away to the circus. There’s something between us. I finally know he feels it too.”

“What are you not telling me, cousin?” She pries, sensing there’s more to what I’m saying.

I glance at Tavien to make sure he’s not eavesdropping and find him thoroughly engrossed in his rock skipping.

“Well, something happened the other night,” I reveal, drawing out my big reveal with a grin.

“And what happened the other night?” Miriam asks, intrigued by the mystery.

“My father took us to the circus last week. He received free tickets at work. It was a strange bonus, but I got to watch him perform one of his best shows I’ve ever seen,” I swoon.

“Is that all?” Miriam asks, trying her best not to look disappointed.

“He kissed me after the show.” My words are laced with excitement.

Miriam clasps her hands over her mouth, covering up a quiet squeal. “Was it magical? Tell me it was magical!”

“It was everything I ever imagined it would be… until Father attacked him.”

“I’m sorry.” She hugs me. “But Mercy, he—” she pauses, looking at Tavien. “He actually kissed you. This is huge.”

I beam. “I know,” I squeal, choosing to keep what he said to me before he did a secret… for now.

I replay his words: There are things I can’t tell you, but I don’t want to fight this anymore.

I can’t fight it anymore. So if you’re going to be my undoing, then all I want is to crash and fall with you in my arms. I don’t know what he’s fighting, and I don’t care about the things he’s left unsaid.

All that matters is he wants me. I’ve dreamed of that feeling over and over—yearning for his embrace, a place to call home.

“So,” Miriam sighs, interrupting my thoughts. “Would you run away with him?”

It’s my turn to bite my lip. “Honestly? Yes.”

“After only one kiss?” Miriam teases, but I feel the sting of her judgment.

She doesn’t know him like I do, I remind myself, shaking off the shame and smiling at her to hide it.

“What can I say? It was that good.” And then we’re giggling again.

Hours pass, and we talk on and on until all too soon, soft colors paint the skies—purples, pinks, and blues peeking through.

The day is ending, slipping away to night, and even though the docks are still bustling from the delivery, it’s time to go home.

The shadows remind me of my last twilight walk.

I tense without meaning to, a shiver crawling up my spine.

“Do you want Tavien to walk you home?” Miriam asks, sensing my unease.

I nod, unable to accept her offer verbally, feeling slightly childish in my agreement. She smiles warmly, giving my arm an understanding squeeze before calling to her brother.

“Tavien!” He stops skipping rocks, giving Miriam and me his full attention.

“Can you walk Mercy home? It’s getting late.”

“Yeah, are the two of you ready?” he asks, eyeing us as we splash toward the beach.

“Yes, thank you. I don’t want to be late for dinner.” I reply, a half-truth.

Tavien doesn’t need to know about my encounter with Azrael the last time I left the markets. It’s my little secret, and something I don’t need anyone else finding out about. I enjoy my freedom all too much to jeopardize it.

“Are you coming with us?” Tavien asks Miriam.

“I think I should help with dinner and baths for the younger children at home. From the looks of things here, they’re still going to be unloading this ship until they run out of daylight. I’m sure our mother will appreciate the help.”

“Let her know I’ll be along after I take Mercy home.

I’ll bring some sandwiches back up here so Father and the rest of the men can grab a quick bite.

They’re sure to be exhausted. I’ve been watching all day, and from what I can tell, they’re unloading double the size of shipments we normally receive,” he answers.

Oh, how it makes me long for a sibling of my own to share the burden with.

But then again, I can’t wish my father on anyone else, let alone worry about protecting someone else from him.

I hug Miriam extra tight when we reach the shore.

She really is the closest thing I have to a sister.

Or a friend. Tavien and I walk in a comfortable silence.

He’s always been on the quieter side—observant and calm, taking in the entire world around him while assessing it in his mind.

It only bothers me because I’m left painfully alone in my thoughts.

I can’t help but shake the feeling that we’re being watched or followed.

Every few minutes, I steal a long glance over my shoulder, as if waiting for someone else to appear.

Tavien seems unbothered, but he is on high alert too, constantly scanning our surroundings with a hand at his side, ready and waiting to draw the dagger that hangs around his waist from a leather belt.

We’re halfway between home and the markets when a figure appears out of nowhere, leaping into our path and blocking the way.

Tavien throws out a protective arm in front of me, instantly reaching for his blade.

It feels wrong. My cousin is younger than I am, and while his build rivals the older men on the docks, he’s still just a boy.

He shouldn’t be the one protecting me. I wish Azrael were here.

Silently, I plead for him in my mind. Please Azrael, come for me. Rescue us.

The figure turns to face us, unnaturally slow, like a predator playing with its food. My heart thunders loudly in my chest, rapidly racing as if it might break free and run away to safety. And then I’m screaming as it charges right for us.

My screams drown out everything around me as the hideous creature lunges right for Tavien.

Its mouth is gaping wide, filled with thousands of sharp-pointed teeth.

This thing isn’t human. It’s some kind of nightmare we hear about in bedtime stories meant to scare us.

Tavien remains calm. He moves away from me, separating us by mere inches as he bravely charges forward to meet the attacker.

In the fading light, the sea glass catches the last rays of the sun, casting a faint glow where it meets the silver metal of Tavien’s dagger.

It’s fitting his weapon is crafted with sea glass as a decorative touch rather than expensive foreign gems. Most of the merchants and traders carry similar weapons, all with sea glass forged into the iron and steel.

“Stay behind me,” he urges protectively. “If you have to run, don’t look back. Go straight to the docks, or home. Find my father. Or yours. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” I rasp, before covering my mouth to silence a scream in horror.

The creature barreling for us is closing in, wings flapping, and a toothy snarl gaping wide.

I get a good look at it, immediately regretting doing so.

I want to squeeze my eyes shut, to wait for the cold tendrils of death to take me, but Tavien—brave, sweet Tavien who is still so much a boy—stands in front of me, unafraid and ready to fight.

The creature is horrifying. Six jagged wings curl like scythes, folding and unfurling with sickening snaps, as it moves toward us.

Once again, its mouth stretches too wide, and I get yet another glimpse of the splintered teeth like broken glass.

Its eyes burn like inverted stars—black voids rimmed with molten gold.

Oh, gods, how I wish Azrael were here to protect me.

Terror twists and turns, burrowing into my stomach.

I’m frozen in place behind Tavien, unable to react.

Tavien steps forward like a warrior with years of training, expertly angling his dagger so the first blow is only a warning.

He slices across its arm, kicking it back—his foot connecting with its chest so hard that it falls to the ground.

But the creature is relentless. It jumps to its feet and charges again.

This time, death awaits it on the tip of the dagger.

Tavien slides it right into the neck, just above the collarbone, with a precision that leaves me breathless.

Crimson, silver-streaked, glittering liquid seeps out, and I gasp.

“Look away, Mercy. I’m sorry. Look away, ”Tavien shouts over my panicked sobs.

But I can’t. I can’t look away from the horrible creature.

Tavien pulls his bloody dagger from its throat, and it falls to the ground, completely lifeless.

He cleans his blade in the dirt, sheathes it, then embraces me, whispering soft words of reassurance.

“Mercy, it’s okay. He was just some old pickpocket.

Probably strung out on the elixir or booze.

He’d have harmed us, or worse, snatched you for the illegal human trades. ”

I nod my understanding, except I’m confused.

Does he not see what I see? Can he not see the six blood-covered wings, withered and curled like the leaves of a dead plant?

Or the blood still trickling over the vicious incisors.

Does Tavien see a man where I see a beast?

My thoughts overwhelm me as I look over Tavien’s shoulder at the lifeless body laying on the street.

When my tears have dried and I’m calm again, we finally continue our walk home. I clutch his arm, both of us silent as the shock settles.

Tavien walks me right up to the door. I file past my mother and to my room so I can change.

As I walk down the hallway, I hear him ask if my father has a minute.

My heart sinks. Nothing good can come from a conversation with my father.

I know, deep down, Tavien feels duty-bound, but a bad feeling settles over me as the front door closes loudly.